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Rudy Park

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101. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-08-12 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-08-12 Pub. Date: 2015-08-12
Image Number: 131011
Caption: I hate Planned Parenthood. They're so evil. How so? They were caught on tape casually talking about stuff they deal with every single day. That means they're so used to what they do, that it doesn't make them tear up or feel sad to talk about it. Like if I ever get into a horrible car accident and my guts are everywhere, I want a doctor who's going to throw up when he sees it. That's the least a professional could do.
     
102. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-06-26 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-06-26 Pub. Date: 2015-06-26
Image Number: 128756
Caption: You and I need to set a time to talk. I have a side business of network marketing which is amazing! … And I'm excited about sharing this excellent opportunity with you … my dear friend. What're you doing? You can work from home, make your own hours … and build a multi-million-dollar business working 10 hours a week. HOJ. Are you reciting some sort of script to me? Of course not. If I forward you a brief video, will you watch it?
     
103. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-06-14 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-06-14 Pub. Date: 2015-06-14
Image Number: 127575
Caption: Hello, Rudy. What would you like, Uncle Mort? I'd like you to promise me you'll give due consideration to Bernie Sanders. Not sure we have that. Stop joking. This may be America's last chance to avoid a dystopian future where we're all slaves to a heartless corporate-run plutocracy. What do you have against dystopian futures run by heartless corporations? Some of our best movies and video games are set in that kind of future. I'm not going to win this one, am I? Can Bernie Sandwich give us replicants and hover-cars? SANDERS!!! I'm looking forward to playing two-player with my clone.
     
104. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-03-26 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-03-26 Pub. Date: 2015-03-26
Image Number: 124712
Caption: I rented a car from Hertz the other day, and there was a camera in it. Really? Someone forgot their camera? No, I mean in the dashboard. There was a little camera pointed at me. I have no idea who or what was watching me. Maybe it was Hertz. Maybe it was the NSA. Maybe it was for American Idol auditions. To cover all my bases, I sang the Star-Spangled Banner the whole drive. I'm never renting from Hertz again.
     
105. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-02-05 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-02-05 Pub. Date: 2015-02-05
Image Number: 122489
Caption: Boss … I need to take a few months off for paternity leave. That's commendable. I'm all for fathers taking an active role in their children's lives. It's good for the health of our economy. Take all the time you need, as long as the "baby" you're talking about isn't a kitten, a houseplant or some video game where you raise a simulation of a baby. I'd like to withdraw my request. I thought you might, minion.
     
106. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-31 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-31 Pub. Date: 2015-01-31
Image Number: 122186
Caption: Sometimes I wish I were a character in a video game. What? Why? Because they can run for miles, jump, tumble, spin, kick and punch, and never get out of breath. I can't run more than 100 feet without getting winded … and in civilization, you don't ever see an archer die of old age. Simulation-envy.
     
107. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-18 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-18 Pub. Date: 2015-01-18
Image Number: 120915
Caption: It's the Fad Herald. Please say hoverboards are in. Hear ye, today, a special announcement. The following is now in: Totally ignoring that we're now living in the year depicted in the movie "Back to the Future, part 2." Out: Any observation about what's come true: 3D movies, tablet computers, video conferencing, wall-mounted, wide-screen TVs that display multiple channels at once, being consumed by personal electronics and hoverboards. Um ... But I've been waiting 26 years to make those observations. Me too. Same here. And I've been waiting 26 years to mock everyone who does that. I'm not sure you got this one right, Fad Herald. Also out: Questioning what you're told. Oh. Sorry about that.
     
108. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-16 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-16 Pub. Date: 2015-01-16
Image Number: 121463
Caption: What if history had turned out differently? I've often wondered the same thing. What if the nuclear tests had happened at a different Marshall Island, other than Bikini Atoll? The bikini could've very well been called "the Rongerik." or "the Enewetak." or "the Rongelap." The possible perturbations boggle the mind. I meant something more important. ... Like how if Nintendo had adopted compact discs, the Playstation never would've happened.
     
109. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-12-06 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-12-06 Pub. Date: 2014-12-06
Image Number: 119728
Caption: Okay, dictation monkey, can you read back to me my Hypochondriac's Handbook Rules To Live By? Not really. While you were talking, I was pretending to type what you said, but I was actually playing a video game on my phone. I can't strangle you because I don't want to touch your cold-and-flu ridden corpus. One of those moments I just relish.
     
110. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-10-14 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-10-14 Pub. Date: 2014-10-14
Image Number: 117698
Caption: You took the first step: you bought a run-down shack in an up-and-coming location. Now you need to rehab it and get it sold. You've also let yourself go. You've gotten a little fat. You've taken the second step: You ordered "Nailed It!" The brand new workout from Insanity creator Shaun T. Today's video is cardio power tape-measuring. Huff huff. Pick up the pace!
     
111. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-10-04 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-10-04 Pub. Date: 2014-10-04
Image Number: 117143
Caption: Rudy, if you're playing a video game in there, I'm breaking this door down. Some of us have to GO. Of course I'm not. What's that beeping? I hear beeping in there. You're mistaken. What you probably heard is a big truck backing up a few blocks away. I've backed up. I've put on my motorcycle helmet. I'm getting a running start. BUT I'M ALMOST AT THE NEXT LEVEL! ... I mean I'm almost done.
     
112. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-10-03 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-10-03 Pub. Date: 2014-10-03
Image Number: 117142
Caption: You are not allowed to join the army, little buddy. You don’t want me getting hurt in the war? I just don’t think someone who's never won an arm-wrestling match in his life has any business taking on terrorists. For your information, you're looking at the world lightweight champion of thumb wrestling, fourteen years running. Not at all the same thing. And my mom said playing video games would never take me anywhere.
     
113. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-09-25 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-09-25 Pub. Date: 2014-09-25
Image Number: 116832
Caption: I really think I can handle this date on my own. Lemme ask you something. Would you trust me alone with a ybot 340? An Xbox 360? They changed the name? Okay. But you cannot hit on my date. I'm only here to help.
     
114. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-09-13 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-09-13 Pub. Date: 2014-09-13
Image Number: 116263
Caption: All the police brutality in the news makes it seem like it's happening more. It's not? Of course not. We've had police brutality ever since we first had police. You youngsters don’t know what police brutality is. Everything you've seen on your TV is what's done by police who know they're probably being recorded. When I was your age, there were no cellphone cameras or dashboard cams. Imagine what cops did before cameras existed! Anything that happened before I was born is meaningless to me.
     
115. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-09-02 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-09-02 Pub. Date: 2014-09-02
Image Number: 115993
Caption: I've decided to have a kid. I've decided to get my hearing checked. No, really. There are two ways to become a YouTube star. Either pull pranks on strangers … … or post cute kid videos. And since I'm kind of shy … First check if you're on the federal "do-not-reproduce" list.
     
116. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-09-01 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-09-01 Pub. Date: 2014-09-01
Image Number: 115992
Caption: What're you doing?! Your contract forbids you from watching "cute baby videos" on YouTube. Cute baby videos lead to employees wanting to have cute babies of their own. Having babies leads to employees asking for raises and time off. I don’t think everything in a contract is enforceable, boss. "Thinking" is forbidden by your contract.
     
117. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-08-22 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-08-22 Pub. Date: 2014-08-22
Image Number: 115312
Caption: Anyhow, thanks for listening, Rudy. It's part of the job. I guess you're right: the move to 3rd grade is a big one. There are lots of changes. You've just got to roll with it. And buy a new video game console? It eases any transition. How did you get to be so smart? Playing lots of video games.
     
118. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-08-09 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-08-09 Pub. Date: 2014-08-09
Image Number: 114703
Caption: "Batman v Superman" was just awful. Just AWFUL! Wait … what? Everyone was just sitting around a table and holding papers and saying their lines. They never even put on their costumes. You can't judge a movie based on the unfinished Chinese bootleg version of it. At least it was better than "Batman v Superman Again." Have you heard of patience?
     
119. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-07-23 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-07-23 Pub. Date: 2014-07-23
Image Number: 114173
Caption: I just need exactly 30 minutes to go to a funeral. Exactly? That's how long it'll take me to march to the archipelago where Bajor was and light a dragon on fire in Bajor's honor. I hope you're going to tell me you're talking about some video game … … because paying for your mental health care would violate my religious beliefs, and the supreme court said I don't have to do that. I dressed my pikemen in black.
     
120. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-07-21 video 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-07-21 Pub. Date: 2014-07-21
Image Number: 114171
Caption: I'm sorry, can you repeat your order? Why? Because when I was about to hit "new order," an alert popped up … … telling me my city was being marched on by an enemy alliance. Naturally, I had to launch the game and send all my troops, hero and resources to hide in Bajor a friendly neighboring city. Congratulations! Your troops have DESTROYED Bajor. This is probably how the Israeli-Palestinian thing started. What? where's my coffee?
     
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