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Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons

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1. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2018-04-07 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2018-04-07 Pub. Date: 2018-04-07
Image Number: 170446
Caption: Trump is getting tough with the Chinese: They want a trade war? Fine! I figure it might be a long war, so we better stock up. Made in China.
     
2. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2018-03-22 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2018-03-22 Pub. Date: 2018-03-22
Image Number: 169843
Caption: Steve Bannon and Robert Mercer Discuss Their Next Candidate. Zuckerberg! He's got dirt on everyone and they pay him! Genius!
     
3. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2018-01-20 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2018-01-20 Pub. Date: 2018-01-20
Image Number: 167640
Caption: Remember that guy Morales who used to be in our unit? The guy who came to the U.S. at ten years old, did well in school, went to college, then enlisted, made sergeant, served in a combat zone, honorably discharged, got married, had two kids … What about him? They're deporting him ...
     
4. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2018-01-05 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2018-01-05 Pub. Date: 2018-01-05
Image Number: 167120
Caption: Senator Orrin Hatch Announces His Retirement. What am I going to do? Where am I going to find people to crap on? Where am I going to find powerful people to kiss up to? Where am I going to find corporations who will give me money to push laws they want, and to kill regulations they don't want? Where am I going to find judges who will suck up to me if I promise to appoint them so they can take care of my friends? Where am I going to find people who will pretend I'm not an egotistical crook on a global scale? Where ... where ... where? God, I am going to miss this job.
     
5. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2018-01-02 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2018-01-02 Pub. Date: 2018-01-02
Image Number: 166838
Caption: US Marines Issues Skis. Training to Fight in North Korea. Why isn't China helping with this mission? Well … they probably made the skis.
     
6. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-12-24 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-12-24 Pub. Date: 2017-12-24
Image Number: 166525
Caption: From a Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens. "Oh, Man!" looks here. Look, look, down here!" exclaimed the Ghost. They were a boy and a girl. Yellow, meagre, scowling, wolfish; but prostrate, too, in their humility. Where graceful youth should have filled their features out, and touched them with its freshest tints, a stale and shrivelled hand, like that of age, had pinched, and twisted them, and pulled them into shreds. Where angels might have sat enthroned, devils lurked, and glared out menacing. No change, no degradation, no perversion of humanity, in any grade, through all the mysteries of wonderful creation, has monsters half so horrible and dread. Scrooge started back, appalled. Having them shown to him in this way, he tried to say they were fine children, but the words choked themselves, rather than be parties to a lie of such enormous magnitude. "Spirit! Are they yours!" Scrooge could say now more. "They are Man's," said the Spirit, looking down upon them. "And they cling to me, appealing from their fathers. This boy is Ignorance. This girl is Want. Beware them both, and all of their degree, but most of all beware this boy, for on his brow I see that written which is Doom, unless the writing be erased. "Deny it!" cried the Spirit, stretching out its hand towards the city. "Slander those who tell it ye! Admit it for your factious purposes, and make it worse. And bide the end!" "Have they no refuge or resource!" cried Scrooge. "Are there no prisons!" said the Spirit, turning on him for the last time with his own words. "Are there no workhouses!"
     
7. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-12-09 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-12-09 Pub. Date: 2017-12-09
Image Number: 166170
Caption: Things are fine … and if they're not, it's all Obama's fault.
     
8. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-10-20 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-10-20 Pub. Date: 2017-10-20
Image Number: 164134
Caption: So You Get All Your News from the Internet? That's right. So I know it's all true. See, they can't put anything on the internet unless it's true. Where did you hear that? On the internet … Make America Great Again.
     
9. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-10-17 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-10-17 Pub. Date: 2017-10-17
Image Number: 164071
Caption: Mike Pence Spots Some People Kneeling! Oh, Dear! But dear! They might be praying! Praying for what? Puerto Rico? We can't take that chance!
     
10. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-09-22 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-09-22 Pub. Date: 2017-09-22
Image Number: 163249
Caption: The West thing they can starve North Koreans into submission. And possibly millions of North Koreans may starve to death. But our enemies overlook one important fact. I won't starve.
     
11. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-09-20 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-09-20 Pub. Date: 2017-09-20
Image Number: 163074
Caption: We're comin' to the place I love … when no one knows what they're fighting for, and the whole thing is a confusing, hideous mess, and the killing goes on for years. Great … I'm tellin' you, just great … War. The Vietnam War. PBS.
     
12. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-09-13 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-09-13 Pub. Date: 2017-09-13
Image Number: 162830
Caption: Mr McConnell and Mr. Ryan Remember. Well, you know what they say in Washington if you want a friend … get a dog. Mueller Investigation. Welcome to the Kushners.
     
13. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-08-06 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-08-06 Pub. Date: 2017-08-06
Image Number: 161457
Caption: That's right! I won the most stupendous vote in the history of the world, and you can't believe the lying media. They don't even speak English … and Hillary is a Russian spy, of course, you knew that … by Gumphrey Daniels … Ain't that nice for the president to come and tell pa how things are ... Why, of course, ma, we his people ... The Base.
     
14. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-07-20 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-07-20 Pub. Date: 2017-07-20
Image Number: 160707
Caption: Russian Lawyer Lady Natalia Veselnitskaya, Former Trump Whisperer, Questioned by Vladimir Putin. Oh, Great One, we have misjudged the Americans. They are crazy but not stupid.
     
15. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-05-08 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-05-08 Pub. Date: 2017-05-08
Image Number: 157992
Caption: Russian Attempt to Hack French Elections Fails. What went wrong? We used the same hacking tricks!! They worked on the Americans!! What? Comrade Putin says return to Moscow immediately? Gulp! Gulp!
     
16. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-04-24 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-04-24 Pub. Date: 2017-04-24
Image Number: 157466
Caption: Mr. Sessions Instructs American Cities They Better Cooperate With the Feds. Ok, pay attention. This is a strongly worded letter … LA. Philly. New York. Chicago. Boston. Eh … You better obey … er um … er …
     
17. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-03-25 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-03-25 Pub. Date: 2017-03-25
Image Number: 156369
Caption: Form 1040. Department of the Treasury. Internal Revenue Service. U.S. Individual Income Tax Return. 2016. OMB No. 1545-0074. IRS Use only - Keep your greasy fingers off this space. For the year Jan. 1 - Dec. 31, 2016 (And thank God THAT's over!). 2016 ending. 20. See separate instructions. Your Name (Phonetic Spelling). Your Name Used on Dating Service (Attach Recent Photograph). Your Social Security Number. Your gang or mob name (Ex: Louise Pepperoniface, etc) Your Travel Name (Do Not Use Mohammed). Your Other Social Security Number. Address of Your House Before Foreclosure. Crappy apt. you moved to. Bass Ale! How about a cold one right now? (adv.) City, State or Exit from Jersey Turnpike (if you have foreign address, go there and wait for instructions.) Presidential Election Campaign. Checking Here Will Not Make a Damn Bit of Difference. You. Whatshername. Instructions: Drop Dead. Except for Canada, Canada still OK. Eh? Filing Status. Or Fling Status. (It is later than you think.) 1. Single (in the Republican sense of the word). 2. Married Filing Jointly (include all arguments). 3. Married Filing Separately (include sex of partner if you remember). 4. Head of Household (are you the person who sits with head in hands and wonders how you are going to feed all these mistakes, er dependents?) Enter names of dependents. Write small. 5. Qualifying widower. Enter golf handicap. Exemptions. See Publication EXX "Exemption to Exemptions to Exemptions". If more than four exemptions, or if some exemptions have four legs check here. 6a. Yourself. (That's right, you, stupid. If you are not yourself, who did you claim to be?). b. Spouse (or anyone who thinks they should be) (That's a funny word. "spouse") c. Dependents: 1 First name. Nom de plume or AKAs. Phonetic Social Security Number. Last known address? Does this dependent follow instructions? (See instructions). Boxes checked. No. of children who had live-in girlfriends/boyfriends. Had their divorced spouses living with you. You asked to leave but they had no place to go. Add numbers on lines above. (OK to use fingers). d. Total number of exemptions claimed (Round up to nearest 3/5's). Income. Attach forms here. Attach a couple of Andy J's while you're at it, to speed processing. Your ad here! Read by millions! Contact IRS Media. Helpful Hint. We are not going to give you any helpful hints. 7 Wages, salaries, tips, bottle deposits, bribes, free lunches, coins found in couch cushions. 8a Taxable interest. Attach Schedule B. If you don't understand, go to plan B. b. Tax-exempt interest. Much more interesting, isn't it? 9a Ordinary dividends. Nothing special, just Joe the Dividend. b Qualified dividends. Big Whoop. Trump's Rich Friends. 10. Taxable Refunds. Bank error in your favor. Pass GO, collect 200. 11. Alimony received (if that bum ever paid up). 12. Business Income or (loss). Use Schedule EZ come, EZ go. 13. Capital gain of (loss). Include your share of the national debt. 14. Other gains or (losses). Check box if you are just making stuff up. 15a. IRA distributions. b. Amount you had with Lehman. 16a. Pensions and annuities. b Amount with State of Illinois. 17. Rental real estate, royalties, partnerships (Use Schedule X to report missing partner). 18. Farm Income or (loss), Attach Schedule F (Do not include the funny farm). 19. Unemployment compensation (Amazing isn't it? You get taxed on this, too). 20a. Social Security benefits b. Taxable amount. 21. Other Income. (Bake sales, washing cars, baby-sitting, bingo games, don't hide anything). 22. This is your total income. Unless you are General Electric. If so write zero. Adjusted Gross Income. Remember you can file this form electronically, using your computer, and really mess things up. 23 Educator expenses (Spankings, noogies, butt-kicking). 24 Certain business expenses that you as a mere nobody have no business knowing about. Just keep moving. 25 Health savings account deduction. (May make you sick.) 26 Moving expenses. (See instructions). 27 Instruction tax. 28 Self-employment tax. 29 Self-enjoyment tax. 30 Penalty for early withdrawal (One-half of self-enjoyment tax). 31a Alimony paid. Rat out spouse's SSAN. 32 USSR tax (Useless Social Security Recipients). 33 Student loan interest (Do not include English majors). 34 Lack of interest in being a student. 35. Add up lines one to a million, divide by twice the total sum of your weight in Chinese running shoes. If greater than one-half of total something, go forth and multiply. 36. This is your adjusted gross income (Adjusted? We mean disgusted.) Now we can go to page two, tra-la. Last thought: Any money or thing of worth laying around? Better send it in. Just in case. Hey, you never know. Cat. No. 11320B. Form 1040 (2016).
     
18. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-02-20 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-02-20 Pub. Date: 2017-02-20
Image Number: 154967
Caption: Nixon in the Underworld. It's the Republican party … they miss you. DNR. Add oil daily.
     
19. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-01-02 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-01-02 Pub. Date: 2017-01-02
Image Number: 153023
Caption: Putin Says He Will Not Expel 35 American Diplomats. But Mr. President, we must punish these Americans. They are still here, aren't they? Oooh, he is so smart! Da. Nyet.
     
20. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-11-29 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-11-29 Pub. Date: 2016-11-29
Image Number: 151729
Caption: What About Those Two Million More People Who Voted for Clinton? Darling don't feel bad … obviously they were all illegal voters … Now, bo de wee nosey …
     
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