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Candorville

Comics and cartoons about things that are stolen .

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Result page:    2  3  Next  (53 images)


1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-10-16 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-10-16 Pub. Date: 2017-10-16
Image Number: 163902
Caption: Do you have any idea how many mass shootings we've had in America this year? In just the first 75 days of the year, we had 273 mass shootings. That's almost one per day. There are more mass shootings than there are days in the baseball season. You know what that means, don't you? It mean mass shootings is America new national pastime. Stop stealing my lines.
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-10-08 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-10-08 Pub. Date: 2017-10-08
Image Number: 162900
Caption: Big L, you seen a doctor yet 'bout that heart attack you had? I didn't have a "heart attack," Clyde. All I had was pain in my arm, between my shoulder blades, in my chest, jaw and upper abdomen. Plus I was dizzy, fatigues and had heartburn. That could've been anything. And anyway, I took care of it myself. I started biking, gave up red meat, etc ... just in case. Anyway, I don't have health insurance. I earn too much for Medicaid and too little pay the Obamacare premiums. I got a solution for you, bruh ... Ok ... As long as it doesn't involve identity theft, Fake IDs and possible jail time. Hm ... well, then I got a different solution for you ... As long as it doesn't involve sneaking into another country. Well ... then I got a different solution ...
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-09-27 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-09-27 Pub. Date: 2017-09-27
Image Number: 163099
Caption: Guess what daddy heard on the radio today, son? I heard that an English settler named Clarence Hornswaggler stole the recipe for popcorn from Native Americans. It was an early example of cultural appropriation, and we don't encourage that sort of thing in this house. I thtill want popcorn fow dinnew. (Sigh), ok, let's try this: No popcorn for dinner because I said so.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-08-03 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-08-03 Pub. Date: 2017-08-03
Image Number: 161033
Caption: Big L, your checkin' account be overdrawn. Really? Thanks for … wait, how do you know I'm overdrawn? You might wanna warn a brotha next time. That !@#$ was embarrassin'. I had to put back all my groceries. I knew a decoy account was a good idea.
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-07-21 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-07-21 Pub. Date: 2017-07-21
Image Number: 160505
Caption: She had dinner with Randy "The Rock" Taylor, the 6-foot-5 former football player. Uh-oh … The guy who writes "MANuals," the best-selling series of advice books for me. Is he dwelling on it? The guy who gave a Ted Talk on "The Art of Hot Lovin'." I hope he's not dwelling on it. The guy who wrote "How to Steal a Woman's Heart: For Dummies." He's probably not dwelling on it.
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-05-11 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-05-11 Pub. Date: 2017-05-11
Image Number: 157810
Caption: How was I supposed to know it was innocent? You asked me to "hold something" for you. Never in the history of man has that turned out well for the person who's said "ok." Yeah, well Big Oatmeal an' the rest of the boys found it in my closet. All I could think of to save my rep was to say "I sell them things for $5 at the playground." I'm still not helping you break into "Big Oatmeal's" house to steal back you old Teddy Ruxpin. You ain't no real friend.
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-04-05 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-04-05 Pub. Date: 2017-04-05
Image Number: 156467
Caption: I'm heading to DC to report on the Democratic party's filibuster against that judge Trump's appointed to the stolen Supreme Court seat. And then I'm going to cover how they all boldly signed on to Bernie Sanders' Medicare-for-All bill. Wait … are you being sarcastic? Then I'm going to cover their stunning refusal to accept any more Wall Street bribes.
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-02-24 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-02-24 Pub. Date: 2017-02-24
Image Number: 154805
Caption: Lemont? Where've you been all day? I was waiting for you at lunch and you never showed up. I couldn't. After I dropped Lionel off at day care, everything went wrong. Someone had snatched my wallet, so I had to walk 20 blocks to get home. But my keys were missing, so I tried to climb in the fire escape. That's when I got arrested. Didn't they give you one phone call? I used it to call a lawyer. Forgive me for being so selfish. I waited a whole hour, Lemont.
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-01-23 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-01-23 Pub. Date: 2017-01-23
Image Number: 153701
Caption: I sense the tides have shifted, Rosencrantz. The pendulum has reversed its swing. A page has been turned. A new character has entered stage left. And nothing will ever, ever be the same. The tale has been sent down a fateful path, which ends either in exaltation or oblivion, we know not which. Oh ... wait ... perchance I just have gas. Served you right for stealing my week-old sandwich.
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-07-23 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-07-23 Pub. Date: 2016-07-23
Image Number: 146144
Caption: But I just wanna show you a magic trick. No. All I need is your favorite color and your first pet's name. No. I'm not giving you anything that'll help you guess my passwords. Ok. Then jus' gimme the name of your favorite high school teacher. Good talk, Clyde.
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-07-22 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-07-22 Pub. Date: 2016-07-22
Image Number: 146143
Caption: Two years ago. There's a video showing Michael Brown stealing something and bullying a shopkeeper. That's absolute proof he was just a thug who needed to be put down. Two weeks ago. So what if there's video of cops seeming to shoot people unnecessarily? You can't tell anything from a video. What?
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-05-24 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-05-24 Pub. Date: 2016-05-24
Image Number: 143638
Caption: I don't know why fools be keepin' useless junk from long ago. What the point of that is? How often you gonna open that box in your garage to look at the apple you finger-painted when you was four? They ain't no future generations gonna enshrine your third-grade diary in the Smithsonian. Ain't nobody gonna care 'bout no package Amazon delivered to your doorstep last week. I said give me back my package!
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-05-05 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-05-05 Pub. Date: 2016-05-05
Image Number: 142721
Caption: I'm sorry my check bounced last week, doc. That was because some Nigerian scammers stole my bank account. Dr. Noodle. I see. And how did that make you feel? Angry, I guess. Angry at them? Or angry at yourself for letting your gullibility impact not only your life, but the lives of people to whom you owe money? I thought these sessions were supposed to be about MY feelings. They are. Let's explore how inconveniencing your therapist makes you feel.
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-04-19 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-04-19 Pub. Date: 2016-04-19
Image Number: 142113
Caption: What's wrong? I'm ruined. When the Pulitzer board called yesterday to tell me I'd won this year's Pulitzer Prize for snarky criticism, Clyde answered, accused them of running a scam, and hung up. I cussed Clyde out. I called them back at the number they called me from, and apologized profusely. They asked me a bunch of questions to prove I was really me. So you got your Pulitzer Prize?! I got my bank account stolen by someone in Nigeria!
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-04-12 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-04-12 Pub. Date: 2016-04-12
Image Number: 141797
Caption: Can I share your fries, Clyde? Oh, so now you wanna share. Where was you when I wanted to share your cable tv line? or your wi-fi? Or your Netflix password? Or your social security number? You somehow got all that anyway. I got that on my own, Big L. That's the problem with American today: Erebody want erething just handed to them.
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-04-11 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-04-11 Pub. Date: 2016-04-11
Image Number: 141796
Caption: Whachoo gone an' canceled cable for, bruh? It's too expensive and I didn't watch most of the channels. I can see all my favorite shows on Netflix and Hulu for a fraction of the cost. That's selfish. Think of the ramifications. Think of the cable workers who gonna lose they job if erebody cut cable. Wait ... how did you know I canceled cable? (A) I don't know what you implying, an' (2) I don't even know how to tap somebody line to secretly share they cable.
     
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-03-19 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-03-19 Pub. Date: 2016-03-19
Image Number: 140514
Caption: Whachooneed, whachooneed I got a toothbrush, a bus pass, a gas card, an alternative to Obamacare Wait back up. What kind of toothbrush? Because my toothbrush recently went missing. I wrote my name on it. Lemme see the handle. Can't. It's the kind that come with a filed-off handle.
     
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-03-15 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-03-15 Pub. Date: 2016-03-15
Image Number: 140510
Caption: The past couple years, I've been rejected for a mortgage, a car loan, a credit card, a Macy's card, Girl Scout cookies How is it that identity thieves were just able to open six credit cards in my name, Clyde? Maybe I should get you to teach me how to steal my own identity. (A) I'm offended you assume I know how to do that ... an' (2) here's how you do it ...
     
19. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-03-14 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-03-14 Pub. Date: 2016-03-14
Image Number: 140509
Caption: I was supposed to be covering a horrible story in Uganda. But then a horrible story broke in the Ukraine. So I changed my ticket to the Ukraine and booked a room at the Motel Sixky. Turns out there is no "Motel Sixky." It was a fake website run by identity thieves. Look on the bright side: Now you got a horrible story to cover right in your house. True.
     
20. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-01-20 stolen 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-01-20 Pub. Date: 2016-01-20
Image Number: 137946
Caption: Thanks for letting my son and me stay here for a while, Clyde. It's just too cold out there to make it home. It's so warm in here. It's almost like you have ten heaters going. I admit nothing. What did you do? Anything people put on the outside of they windows is free.
     
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