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1. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2018-03-24 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-03-24 |
| Image Number: |
169553 |
| Caption: |
Would you like to go out sometime? In your dreams. Well? She said I should sleep on it.
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2. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2018-03-11 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-03-11 |
| Image Number: |
168714 |
| Caption: |
I can't believe you were fired from another job. It was probably my fault, Simone … Turbo Temps. Probably? I think it was because I called in sick … on a Friday. Wait -- that's it? You know, you're allowed a certain amount of sick days. Totally. I even texted my supervisor a doctor's note. And that wasn't good enough? Turns out she got a second opinion from my Facebook photos.
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3. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2018-02-25 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-02-25 |
| Image Number: |
168232 |
| Caption: |
I think Constance and I really hit it off. Ooooh … sounds like somebody's smitten. You think so? Well, tell me how you feel about her. It's hard to describe, Meg … I want to be with her -- wherever she is, every second of the day. Well … okay. I want her to think about me constantly ... to the point she has trouble concentrating on anything else. Seriously? And I want her overwhelmed with panic at the mere thought of losing me. Wow. So, basically, you want to be her cellphone. Exactly! Sale. 50% off.
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4. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2018-02-24 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-02-24 |
| Image Number: |
168482 |
| Caption: |
I'm glad you ended it with that older wealthy woman. Thanks, mom. You know, money will never make you happy. You're right. I finally did the math and knew I had to bail. Wait -- You did the math? Dustin, isn't that a little crass? Not about her money, mom ... I realized when I turn 70, she'll be 85.
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5. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2018-02-23 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-02-23 |
| Image Number: |
168481 |
| Caption: |
Dude, isn't this where you met Louise? Yeah … but that's over. Over? Yeah … it was all about her and her wants and wishes. It got to the point where she acted like I wasn't even there. Man, that must've been horrible. I'm Louise. Can I buy you a drink?
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6. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2018-02-22 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-02-22 |
| Image Number: |
168480 |
| Caption: |
The woman I'm seeing earns way more than I do. I'm afraid she doesn’t respect me. I wouldn't worry … Embrace it. Think about Oprah and Stedman. Totally. Stedman knows where I'm coming from. Stedman.
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7. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2018-02-20 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-02-20 |
| Image Number: |
168478 |
| Caption: |
I need to powder my nose. I'll be right back. Sure thing. Watch out for that one, Dustin. She just wants a boy toy for a little you-know-what. I wish I was twenty years younger.
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8. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2018-02-13 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-02-13 |
| Image Number: |
168234 |
| Caption: |
I ordered your mom a present for Valentine's Day and had the package delivered to my office. Still, she always seems to know what I got her. Um … Dad … You realize your laptop records your browsing history, right?
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9. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2018-02-08 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-02-08 |
| Image Number: |
167993 |
| Caption: |
The barista remembered my drink before I said anything. Does that mean she likes me? I'll bet it does. Either that or she can't believe that you're so set in your ways that you never venture outside of your little box... You know, never try anything new, have no curiosity -- no sense of adventure whatsoever. One of the two. |
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10. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2018-01-28 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-01-28 |
| Image Number: |
167164 |
| Caption: |
Ugh. I waited too long to make dinner reservations and now the restaurant's full. That is utterly thoughtless. Unforgivable. Your secretary, I mean. She should have booked those reservations a week ago. My secretary is new. And he's a dude. Oh, sorry. that was a little sexist on my part, wasn't it? Men. I know, right?
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11. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2018-01-21 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-01-21 |
| Image Number: |
166924 |
| Caption: |
Hello? Hello? Hello? Hellooo? I'm back! Sorry! … my mom called, and she was outside the coverage area.
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12. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2018-01-20 |
Pub. Date: |
2018-01-20 |
| Image Number: |
167170 |
| Caption: |
Well? Dude. She's so hot I got tongue-tied. I told her, I wish I was better with words. But that didn't sound right … so I asked if it's was better with words or were better with words. And? She said I made my point.
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13. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2017-12-20 |
Pub. Date: |
2017-12-20 |
| Image Number: |
166079 |
| Caption: |
Helen's never handed me a list of gift ideas before. She must think I'm losing it. I'm sure she's doesn't think you're losing it, Ed. This morning she emailed me a copy of the list. She thinks you're losing it.
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14. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2017-12-19 |
Pub. Date: |
2017-12-19 |
| Image Number: |
166078 |
| Caption: |
My wife gave me a list of what she wants for Christmas. She's never done that before. Does she think I'm losing it? That I'm completely out of touch? What did you get for her last year? Beep boop bip bip boop. Sweetheart, what did I give you last year for Christmas.
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15. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2017-12-06 |
Pub. Date: |
2017-12-06 |
| Image Number: |
165544 |
| Caption: |
I like to check social media to see what Meg's up to … but lately she doesn't update Facebook that much. I wonder why. Probably the same reason she doesn't sit at the kitchen table and talk to her friends on speakerphone.
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16. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2017-11-10 |
Pub. Date: |
2017-11-10 |
| Image Number: |
164473 |
| Caption: |
Got a minute, Ashley? I've never bought anything on iTunes before. It's for my daughter. No problem. She wants an album by Adele. Which one? I don't know her last name.
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17. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2017-10-15 |
Pub. Date: |
2017-10-15 |
| Image Number: |
163144 |
| Caption: |
What?!! Reformat each file individually? Seriously? Everything okay, Megan? I have to archive, like, two hundred photographs and some are jpegs, some are tiffs -- to make matters worse, there are, like, two dozen pngs! I'm so sorry that happened, sweetheart. Thanks, dad. That means a lot to me. Did you understand a word she said? One thing I've learned, Dustin ... you don't have to understand to be understanding.
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18. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2017-10-06 |
Pub. Date: |
2017-10-06 |
| Image Number: |
163149 |
| Caption: |
The girl I'm sitting next to is killing me. I told her I wanted to be an electrical engineer … and she said she's glad I want to drive a train that doesn't burn fossil fuels. Wait --- so you want to drive a hybrid train instead? The guy I'm sitting next to is killing me.
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19. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2017-09-26 |
Pub. Date: |
2017-09-26 |
| Image Number: |
162903 |
| Caption: |
What's wrong? Meg sent me a text, and while I was composing an answer she sent another text … so now I have to change everything I wrote! Oh, honey, you can't expect … to have the thumb speed of a teenage girl. In that case, I'll resort to extreme measures. I'm calling her on the phone.
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20. |
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| Cartoonist(s): |
Steve Kelley Jeff Parker |
| Comic/Cartoon: |
Dustin |
| Viewable Date: |
2017-09-02 |
Pub. Date: |
2017-09-02 |
| Image Number: |
161865 |
| Caption: |
Your mother just texted me a picture of a dress. I don't know what she wants me to say. Just text an emoji you know she'd like … That's brilliant -- Those emoji are meaningless. There. I sent a smiling serving of chocolate sogt-serve ice cream. Boop. How come it doesn't have a cone?
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