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Rudy Park

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Result page:     (14 images)

1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-14 sea 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-14 Pub. Date: 2017-08-14
Image Number: 161543
Caption: If there were one place on earth you'd never visit, where would that be, Randy? Easy: That would be McMurdo Station, Antarctica, little buddy. Nothing encourages hot snuggling more than being marooned in an icy wasteland. That would be a total waste of my skills of seduction. No challenge. I'd never visit the Mariana Trench. People don't live anywhere near there, and it's the deepest spot in the ocean ... so there'd be no wifi and not even satellite internet could reach it. We should have our own travel show.
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-06-04 sea 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-06-04 Pub. Date: 2017-06-04
Image Number: 158198
Caption: I've never been in here before. What's your best drink? That'd be the Gambler's Mocha. Sounds interesting. What's in it? Oh … a little of this, a little of that. For all you know, it's a smooth blend of hand-mixed Amedei Porcelana dark chocolate from Tuscany ... and Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee beans, hand-picked by sherpas 5,000 feet above sea level precisely at sunset ... topped with a light whip of frozen Arctic sea foam, and black diamond cream from Dubai ... for all you know ... Or it could be day-old sludge made with tap water from Flint? I thought you said you'd never been here before. Siri, where's the nearest Starbucks?
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-03-10 sea 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-03-10 Pub. Date: 2017-03-10
Image Number: 155395
Caption: Boss, if you could be any animal on earth, which one would you be? I'm glad you asked, minion. I'd be a nocturnal, camouflaged Wobbegong at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean. There I'd lie in wait, ever vigilant, ever hungry … ever ready to devour any creature large or small unlucky enough to brush against my whiskers. I'm going to back away now. No, no ... don't back away, minion ... That's when the Wobbegong will get you.
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-10-28 sea 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-10-28 Pub. Date: 2016-10-28
Image Number: 150210
Caption: I came to say bye-bye. But I thought Canada wouldn't grant refugee status. They wouldn't. But mommy says America is scrooged no matter who wins, so we're going to try New Sea Land. Even though that doesn't sound like a real place. New Zealand. I think she means New Zealand. Oh. But we haven't tried the a-through-y-lands yet. What?
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-10-11 sea 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-10-11 Pub. Date: 2016-10-11
Image Number: 149622
Caption: You got a phone call from who? From a "Mrs. Click-Whistle-Chirp." She's a dolphin. She wanted us to know that all the sea creatures and all the land mammals have banded together … to demand that we not elect Donald Trump. They haven't felt this compelled to speak to us since they convinced Noah to build that ark. I guess there are two sides to every story. They'd also like us to know "Flipper" and "Gentle Ben" were stereotyped.
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-05-12 sea 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-05-12 Pub. Date: 2016-05-12
Image Number: 143042
Caption: What's your earliest memory, Sadie? You cannot get under my skin, loser. Maybe I can help you figure it out: were people wearing powdered wigs, or were they wearing togas? Did they live in primitive huts or in trees? I'm not listening! Were they standing upright or swimming in primordial sea? You're about to be swimming in primordial soup.
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-03-27 sea 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-03-27 Pub. Date: 2016-03-27
Image Number: 140308
Caption: To tweet, or not to tweet - that is the question. Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the snark and the venomous replies of anonymous jerks or to take arms against the sea of haters, and by Googling links that prove them wrong, end them. To stop updating, to pause - to pause - perchance to browse the tweets of others ... Ay, there's the rub, for in that browsing state what dreams may come when we have re'lized others are wittier than we. But that the dread of something after tweeting, the undiscovered country, from whose bourn no burned-out Twitter-pundit returns, puzzles the will, and does make anonymous haters of us all. Thus 'tis better to never stop tweeting, and never to read the tweets of others.
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-11-15 sea 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-11-15 Pub. Date: 2015-11-15
Image Number: 134469
Caption: Open mic night presents Meleogris Gobbler. 'Tis the story of a woeful refugee whose plight has been forgotten. An admirable, amiable sort is he but boy is he downtrodden. With courage of the kind you rarely see, he defended his land. When Redcoats invaded over land and sea, he's peck their knees and hands. And how did America repay this debt owed its forest bird? Did you put our noble visage on the national seal as we would have preferred? No. You ate us. Just like the British did. I really think that it's the least you can do to redeem your traitorous heart ... if you grant all my brethren refugee status, before these holidays start. Anyone have any gravy?
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-11-12 sea 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-11-12 Pub. Date: 2015-11-12
Image Number: 135085
Caption: Says here the Navy's going to be patrolling the South China Sea. It could spark a history-changing war. Google tells me the last time a Naval conflict changed history, it was the Battle of Midway. You were alive at that time. How awesome was it to already be ancient when Midway happened? I never expected a question like that from a prepubescent stooge like you. Was it as awesome as when you saw Cleopatra lose at the Battle of Actium? I see you're bringing Google's a-game today.
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-10-05 sea 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-10-05 Pub. Date: 2015-10-05
Image Number: 133534
Caption: I've lost faith in everything, Randy. I feel like a tiny raft drifting in a stormy sea. There is no up. There is no down. The entire foundation of the world is made of flimsy tissue paper. Maybe the Buddhists are right. Maybe nothing is really real at all. Facebook going down for a few hours last week isn't that big a deal, little buddy. Yes, it really is.
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-08-16 sea 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-08-16 Pub. Date: 2015-08-16
Image Number: 130397
Caption: Are you ok, Rudy? Yes. Fine. Just a flu I can't shake. Probiotics. You should be taking probiotics. And barnacles. Wait head is fuzzy. What'd you say? It's an old trick Ernie Hemingway taught me when we were out on the high seas. You don scuba gear, go down to the docks, and scrape barnacles off a ship hull. Then you sleep with them stacked on your forehead and in the morning you stir them into your third mojito. I use ginseng tea instead of mojitos. Works just as well. I haven't been sick a single day in the last 55 years. I think I'll just stick to Robitussin. You're a corporate tool!!! You've got barnacle breath.
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-07-16 sea 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-07-16 Pub. Date: 2014-07-16
Image Number: 113803
Caption: Billions of years ago, Earth had only one huge supercontinent, it was called "Pangea." Pangea was a hellish place. Right now our oceans and seas moderate the climate on all our relatively small land masses. But on Pangea, the inland continents became vast deserts, wrecking Earth's atmosphere. How do you know all this, little buddy? Sadie was there. She told me. I HEARD THAT! I'LL PANGEA YOU!
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-07-08 sea 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-07-08 Pub. Date: 2014-07-08
Image Number: 113514
Caption: Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, Why are you a Yankees fan? Purple pinstripes are WAY better than blue ones. Go Rockies! See ya in the series this year! -Love, prettyinpurple. *(Actual reader letter) Ask Sadie at rudy@rudypark.com. Why do I like the Yankees, Rudy? Dunno. Why do I like Cuban cigars, 100-year-old port, John Wayne, Albert Einstein rubbing my feet while I bathe in salt from THE DEAD SEA?! Um ... Why must I be subjected to letters like this?!?! I can't get past the Einstein thing ...
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-06-01 sea 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-06-01 Pub. Date: 2014-06-01
Image Number: 111310
Caption: Open Mike Night Presents The Poetry Stylings of Rudy Park. O tardigrade, o tardigrade, o microscopic tardigrade Invulnerable invertebrate you disapprove those who venerate Nay, consecrate the vertebrates. Your tiny size cannot negate - in any way invalidate ... Depreciate ... Eliminate your innate state of "great." Almost all life thou doth predate. Mass extinctions? ... You tolerate. While dinosaurs, they meet their fate, you propagate and populate. You survive almost anyplace ... from deepest seas to outer space. To those who try to make a case that having 'no backbone's" disgrace, I point you out, o tardigrade and say ... IN ... YOUR ... FACE! See, Claire?! I'm not the only one who thinks backbones are overrated! Shut up, dear. Ok.
Result page:     (14 images)