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Rudy Park

Comics and cartoons about relationships.

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181. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-06-28 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-06-28 Pub. Date: 2015-06-28
Image Number: 128142
Caption: I need a balloon, but they're locked in a cabinet. That's to keep people from making homemade narcotics. I'm not following. Isn't it obvious? When people see balloons, what's the first thing they think of? Kids? Exactly. And that leads to the desire to have kids. Now, when people want to have kids, the first thing they do is try to attract the opposite sex. Which is why our perfume and cologne are also locked in the cabinet, along with the razors and the makeup. Now ... when dates go well, they lead to hanky panky, which leads to babies. Which is why diapers are also locked in the cabinet. Now, babies grow into kids. Kids get sick a lot, which leads to people buying cough syrup. Cough syrup has been used to make illegal drugs. Which is why cough syrup is also locked in the cabinet ... We lock all the ingredients of illegal narcotics in the cabinet. Just get the key and open the cabinet please. Sorry, we keep the key locked in the cabinet. CVX.
     
182. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-06-25 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-06-25 Pub. Date: 2015-06-25
Image Number: 128755
Caption: Has anyone ever told you you snore, Rudy? No. That's probably because you're single, you've always been single, and you'll always BE single. Not that there's anything wrong with being utterly alone. I've got 3,800 Facebook friends. Being "alone" is so 20th century.
     
183. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-06-12 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-06-12 Pub. Date: 2015-06-12
Image Number: 128140
Caption: Is this Randy the Love Doctor? Speaking. What ails you, brother? I'm in love with my brother's wife. What's the best way to ask her out? Posthumously. No, seriously. I can see myself spending the rest of my life with her. That just may end up being a beautiful five minutes.
     
184. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-06-10 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-06-10 Pub. Date: 2015-06-10
Image Number: 128138
Caption: So you're not running for the Republican party's nomination for president? I'm dropping out to spend more time with my family. What family? You don't have any "family." You don't even have a girlfriend, or any prospects. You don't have so much as a hamster. The closest thing you have to a dependent is the mouse that lives under your bed. If you're quitting 'cause you can't win, just say so. I'm pursuing opportunities in the private sector. Stop it.
     
185. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-05-29 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-05-29 Pub. Date: 2015-05-29
Image Number: 127573
Caption: Hypothetically speaking, how would you suggest a normal man attract a spectacular woman? "Normal"? Like you and me. I mean, not all guys can work out six hours a day. Not every man can be a muscle-bound oaf whose only apparent quality is his animal magnetism. I can hear you in there! No offense, Randy!
     
186. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-05-21 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-05-21 Pub. Date: 2015-05-21
Image Number: 127262
Caption: People see me as a heartless, miserly man whose pursuit of money leaves him with no room for personal relationships. It's taken me a long time to cultivate that image, Randy. But sometimes, when I'm home alone in the cold of the night, I long to feel a warm, comforting body beside me. That's why I've started warming my life-size doll made of $20 bills in the microwave. Is that weird? To each his own.
     
187. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-05-20 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-05-20 Pub. Date: 2015-05-20
Image Number: 127261
Caption: Can I ask you something man-to-man? What's up? Let's say you're delivering your usual enormous campaign contributions to the members of the city zoning boards to ensure no potential competitors can open a café within 50 miles of your own. And let's say you realize you've fallen madly in love with one of the cronies you're bribing. Does it violate any sort of guy code to pursue a romance with your own crony? Very long talk ahead.
     
188. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-05-17 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-05-17 Pub. Date: 2015-05-17
Image Number: 126205
Caption: We're back, baby! Oh, no. Today's Special. Latte + 1hr. Web. $12.50. I'll have Jell-o. Make that two Jello-os. We're celebrating. The old lady and I are back together again. What? How dare you?! I'm only four months older than you. You're on thin ice, darling. Oh, I'm on thin ice, snookums? Am I the one who invited his freeloading sister to live with us without even a discussion? Am I the one who "accidentally" left the gate open so her husband's beloved dog could run away? ... Dear? You're the one who incessantly rubs all that in my face ... Darling pudding-pie. Make mine for here, but make his to go. No, make mine for here, but make hers to go. Sorry, I'm breaking up with both of you.
     
189. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-05-16 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-05-16 Pub. Date: 2015-05-16
Image Number: 126892
Caption: Why on earth would people willingly get into a relationship? Huh? If you're in a serious relationship, you can't be you anymore. You're an "us." The "us" is a tyrant. You can't go out, or choose where to eat, or anything, unless the "us" says it's ok. That's why I've pretty much always been single. Yeeaah ... that must be why.
     
190. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-04-11 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-04-11 Pub. Date: 2015-04-11
Image Number: 125279
Caption: Do you believe in global warming? No, because it snowed last winter. The whole thing's a hoax. Just like the so-called "moon landing". I can't do this. I'm telling you, respecting different opinion triples your dating pool. I'm not that good a swimmer. Maybe a big pool's a bad idea.
     
191. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-04-04 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-04-04 Pub. Date: 2015-04-04
Image Number: 125030
Caption: Mort, may I have a word? Mind your business. It's not safe or polite to make fun of a man carrying a gun. Besides, he's just exercising his 2nd-amendment rights. And I'm exercising my 1st-amendment rights and my right to impress my chick! Your what? Sadie, did you see me stand up to the handgun ape?! Yes dear. Very hot.
     
192. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-03-11 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-03-11 Pub. Date: 2015-03-11
Image Number: 124101
Caption: This had better be important. Hillary Clinton has got me thinking, Darlene. For eight years, she's been teasing us about whether she'll run for president. Maybe you've just been teasing me about us all these years. First of all, that's a sexist way to speak about Hillary Clinton. Secondly, I haven't been teasing you, Rudy. I just don't like you like that!!!! So you're saying I've got a chance?
     
193. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-03-04 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-03-04 Pub. Date: 2015-03-04
Image Number: 123746
Caption: Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, Do you agree with Rudy Giuliani? He said the president doesn't love America, because he's always apologizing for it and finding fault with it. Thoughts? *Actual reader question. Sounds EXACTLY like love to me. My husband would disagree, but don't mind him, he's just a quarrelsome know-it-all. Ask Sadie at asksadie@rudypark.com.
     
194. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-02-15 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-02-15 Pub. Date: 2015-02-15
Image Number: 122187
Caption: I have a date tonight. She's coming over. I need to get home and clean it all up. Not so fast, little buddy. Cleaning is a delicate art. Clean too little, and she thinks you're a slob. Clean too much, and she thinks you're hiding something. It's almost as if you haven't read chapter 7 of the manual. What manual? "Mancleaning: By Randy 'The Rock' Taylor." You wrote a whole book about cleaning? It's the follow-up to "How to Reach the Tenth Level of Passion by Feng Shui-ing Your Dust Bunnies." It's all part of my best-selling "MAN-ual" series.
     
195. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-02-06 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-02-06 Pub. Date: 2015-02-06
Image Number: 122490
Caption: You've reached Randy, The Dating Doctor. What ails you? My girlfriend. She's always dressing me in clothes I don't like, combing my hair in a way I don't like, and trying to get me to do things I don't like to do. That’s because she was impatient. Instead of finding the man of her dreams, she decided to just turn you into the man of her dreams. Run while you're still you. She replaced my running shoes with flip-flops.
     
196. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-15 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-15 Pub. Date: 2015-01-15
Image Number: 121462
Caption: I asked a lady if she wanted to grab a kale smoothie with me. She totally ignored me. Of course she did. Very few ladies are interested in a guy who latches on to the latest fads. It suggests you've got a roving eye, and you'll leave her for someone new later on. Most women like a man who's "classic." Solid. Reliable. Unmoved by the ever-changing winds. That's why I eat nothing but nuts, berries and hippos. If it was good enough for the cavemen, it's good enough for me. I thought cavemen ate brontosauruses.
     
197. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-05 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-05 Pub. Date: 2015-01-05
Image Number: 121145
Caption: The cutest lady I've ever seen in my life just walked in. The Love Doctor's on a break. That's ok, I don't need advice. I think I'll just ask her out on my own. Good for you, little buddy! Yeah, I'm thinking of staring at her a little too long, and then mumbling my name to her ... and then nature will take its course. The Love Doctor will see you now.
     
198. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-12-19 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-12-19 Pub. Date: 2014-12-19
Image Number: 120328
Caption: This is Dr. Sadie, what's your question, caller? I just found out my wife got a bonus at work. But instead of buying gifts for my mother and my six brothers, she flew to Maui and sent me a photo of herself eating a seven-course meal. Stop whining. She's given you the best gift a spouse can give ... Something to hold over her head for the rest of your lives. Well ... There is that, I guess.
     
199. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-12-12 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-12-12 Pub. Date: 2014-12-12
Image Number: 120014
Caption: Is this Randy the Love Doctor? Speaking. What ails you, brother? I'm dating this girl, and she's hinting that she wants a commitment. How do I keep getting what I want without giving her what she wants? That's easy. Every time she opens her mouth to talk about it, softly touch her lips with your finger and say ... "You know what separates us from everyone else?" "We don't even need words. Everything we have to say, we can say with our eyes." How long will that routine buy me? Six weeks of bliss.
     
200. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-11-30 relationship 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-11-30 Pub. Date: 2014-11-30
Image Number: 118881
Caption: Ask Sadie. Actual questions from actual readers. Send your questions to asksadie@rudypark.com. Dear Sadie, My boyfriend refuses to tell me his Facebook password, and his security settings prevent me from seeing who his other friends are. How can I trust that he's not cheating on me if he hides these things from me? -Distraught in Des Moines. I get this question all the time, Distraught. First, you shouldn't jump to conclusions. There's no reason to assume he's cheating. It's just as likely he's running drugs, or he's involved in human trafficking, or he tattoos people against their will and posts the pictures on Facebook. Second, STOP BEING SO NOSY! ARE YOU A GIRLFRIEND OR A PRISON GUARD?! If you don't trust your boyfriend, just leave ... or you can stay and make each other miserable. Both options have their pros and cons. Send questions for Sadie: asksadie@rudypark.com.
     
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