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Rudy Park

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Result page:    2  Next  (38 images)


1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-09-07 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-09-07 Pub. Date: 2017-09-07
Image Number: 162351
Caption: Gimme a hot chocolate. On the rocks. Straight. Lady troubles? And how. Old Mr. Mort told me if I wanted to appeal to the ladies, I should watch some old black and white movies and do what those guys do. So I started jogging downstairs sideways like Cary Grant. I said "see!" after every sentence like James Cagney. I ran in place and yelled "whoop-whoop-whoop!" like Curly. All the girls loved it. But now I have four playdates scheduled at the same time! Not at all where I thought that was going.
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-15 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-15 Pub. Date: 2017-08-15
Image Number: 161544
Caption: Where would you like to go before you kick the bucket, Mort? Easy: Africa, circa 2.5 billion B.C. That's where mankind's ancestors first arose. I could instill my progressive values in humanity from the very beginning. The homo habilis would pass my wisdom down through the ages. By the time Cro-magnon man emerged, we'd already have single-payer health care and a universal basic income. I meant in 2017. Oh ... then ... Denny's.
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-14 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-14 Pub. Date: 2017-08-14
Image Number: 161543
Caption: If there were one place on earth you'd never visit, where would that be, Randy? Easy: That would be McMurdo Station, Antarctica, little buddy. Nothing encourages hot snuggling more than being marooned in an icy wasteland. That would be a total waste of my skills of seduction. No challenge. I'd never visit the Mariana Trench. People don't live anywhere near there, and it's the deepest spot in the ocean ... so there'd be no wifi and not even satellite internet could reach it. We should have our own travel show.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-13 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-13 Pub. Date: 2017-08-13
Image Number: 160983
Caption: What was it you wanted to talk about, minion? There's a guy from Immigration and Customs Enforcement out front, boss. Oh, that. ICE said someone would stop by to thank me for tipping them off to all the illegals who were hanging out at Muhammad's Bean Pie Shack. What? Why would you do that? Because I'm a patriot. In times like this, every patriot must do his duty. If we have good reason to suspect a bean pie shack is a gathering place for people who shouldn't be here, it's our solemn duty to report it, so it'll get shut down. This wouldn't happen to have anything to do with how you've been looking for ways to boost our bean pie sales, would it? Coincidence. Don't be a conspiracy theorist, minion. Oh, and go tell ICE I have another tip for them. Very bad man.
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-06-30 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-06-30 Pub. Date: 2017-06-30
Image Number: 159730
Caption: Meanwhile, in Candorville … " … and the aria turned, smiled sweetly, and stepped off the cliff." The Last Book Store. Meet the author! Thank you, thank you so much. Any questions. I've got a question, miss. Lysurgus Cup. The Willow Chronicles. Clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap. Wow! Clap! Clap clap clap. How hungry are you? I knew a French place around the corner. Wanna get out of here? Yes. I mean NO. I mean, I'm working here. And I've got a man. Lemont. And I AM hungry though. And no! I'll be outside on the Harley.
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-05-21 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-05-21 Pub. Date: 2017-05-21
Image Number: 157666
Caption: Ask Sadie. Our resident surly lass answers actual reader questions sent to rudy@rudypark.com, and posts answers to www.rudypark.com. Dear Sadie, My husband keeps leaving his stuff all over the place and expecting me to pick up after him. How do I get through to him that this isn't the 1950s? - Angry in Anaheim. What is wrong with you?! He doesn't "expect you" to clean up after him! He doesn't care whether you leave his boxers on the coffee table or not. You are the one who cares. You are the only one who cares if things get picked up or not. He would only start caring at the point where the pile gets high enough to block his view of the tv. It's as if you've never even heard of the male species. Ask Sadie, baby!
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-05-04 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-05-04 Pub. Date: 2017-05-04
Image Number: 157561
Caption: It's the "Ask Sadie Advice Hour." "Mad in Montauk," you're on. What's your problem?! House of Java .net Cybercafe. My husband and I are getting divorced, and it's gotten bitter and angry. The problem is, we have 43 mutual friends on Facebook, and he's being so unreasonable about which ones are rightly his. You're arguing over custody of your Facebook friends? What the @#$% is wrong with you people?! Obviously, they're all yours. Everyone knows it's usually the woman who created the friendships in the first place. Also, I should get the kids, right?
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-04-26 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-04-26 Pub. Date: 2017-04-26
Image Number: 157298
Caption: Hey boss, it's almost closing time. Mind if I knock off early? I do indeed, minion. It's a slipper slope. If I let you off ten minutes early, next thing we know you'll be asking for eleven free minutes. Then people will catch wind of it and be asking for time off all over the place. Meanwhile, North Koreans don't ask for time off. They'll be outproducing us. It'll be the end of America. Boss ... are you AirBnB-ing my house again while I'm at work? You can leave here at 5pm and not a minute sooner.
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-03-03 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-03-03 Pub. Date: 2017-03-03
Image Number: 155088
Caption: Show me my childhood pictures. Error: Files not found. Are you sure? I loaded them this morning. I have no record of that. Never mind. Place a Skype call to my Uncle Mort. Error: Meatbag unit 4blpz attempting to subvert divide and conquer stratagem. Um ... show me any new channel. Right now. Error: Did I say that out loud?
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-01-31 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-01-31 Pub. Date: 2017-01-31
Image Number: 153978
Caption: Did you say we import our coffee beans from Chernobyl? Isn't that place a nuclear wasteland? That's culturally insensitive. Chernobyl is a beautiful land of glowing trees and three-headed mooses with raccoon tails. The brave and selfless tribe of hard-working grotesque mutants who hunt our coffee beans for us prefers "post-natural wilderness" to "nuclear wasteland." This is disgu -- Wait, what do you mean "hunt" our coffee beans? Don't get all bleeding-heart about it. The beans skittering around and chucking spears is no evidence they're sentient.
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-01-28 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-01-28 Pub. Date: 2017-01-28
Image Number: 153712
Caption: I just edited your Wikipedia entry. Whoopty doo. Tap tap tap tap tap. You'll be happy to know you are no longer the last of your kind, Sadie. Astronomers have discovered another supermassive black hole that expels nearly as much hot air as you do. You're now listed under "oppressive objects that burp out galactic gas." I will exact revenge at a time and place of my choosing.
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-10-28 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-10-28 Pub. Date: 2016-10-28
Image Number: 150210
Caption: I came to say bye-bye. But I thought Canada wouldn't grant refugee status. They wouldn't. But mommy says America is scrooged no matter who wins, so we're going to try New Sea Land. Even though that doesn't sound like a real place. New Zealand. I think she means New Zealand. Oh. But we haven't tried the a-through-y-lands yet. What?
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-10-26 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-10-26 Pub. Date: 2016-10-26
Image Number: 150208
Caption: What's your question for "Ask Sadie"? How do I talk my wife out of booking a vacation to Syria? Excellent question. It reminds me of the time I vacationed in the Monte Cassino monastery in Italy, in 1944. I had the entire place to myself … There was canasta, and Scrabble, and an excellent view of the Allied assault on the Germans' Gustav line. Man up! A little mortars and rubble never hurt anyone. They are offering discount packages.
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-09-18 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-09-18 Pub. Date: 2016-09-18
Image Number: 147784
Caption: Welcome to the Ask Sadie Radio Advice Hour. You're on Vancouver. It's my boyfriend. He's so distant. No emotionally … Emotionally it's like we're in the very same room, on the very same chair … in the same pair of pants, actually … we're close, is what I'm saying. But he lives so far away. Thousands of miles. And neither one of us can just pick up and move. We both have ties. Responsibilities. There's only one piece of advice I can give you ... Sock puppets. What you do is, you scrawl your lover's likeness onto the sock puppet. Then. whenever you feel heartache, slip it onto your fist ... and pummel yourself in the face for ever starting a stupid long-distance romance in the first place. Um ... thank you?
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-09-13 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-09-13 Pub. Date: 2016-09-13
Image Number: 148486
Caption: You're doing too much, Mort. I don't know what you mean. Optimum scruffiness is a delicate balance. One cannot have both wild hair and a wild mustache. It must be one or the other. What about Einstein? He was behaired all over the place. The only exceptions are for hobos, bikers and the big-brained. I rode my Huffy here, does that count?
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-06-24 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-06-24 Pub. Date: 2016-06-24
Image Number: 144913
Caption: Today's alpha-lesson is "Become a Vapor." Wherever you are, be it a broom closet or a baseball stadium, carry yourself as if your body fills the entire place. Greet people with you arms out wide. Have a wide stance. A booming laugh. A wide-open smile. Becoming a vapor is the best and most legal way to mark your territory.
     
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-05-04 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-05-04 Pub. Date: 2016-05-04
Image Number: 142738
Caption: Don't you hate it when you meet a woman, there's chemistry, things are going great … and then just a few wrong words wreck it all? I met this amazing woman. It was love at first sight … That's when she asked me if there was any place nearby where we could grab a drink. Wait ... you're saying SHE ruined it? I just can't be with someone who's not smart enough to Google things for herself.
     
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-03-07 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-03-07 Pub. Date: 2016-03-07
Image Number: 140197
Caption: Where would you spend your honeymoon? Skyrim, no contest. First, my lady and I would climb the 1,000 snow-covered steps to the summit of the mountain overlooking High Hrothgar … where we'd witness the distant castle glowing silver and blue in the light of the sunrise ... as several planets hover in the morning sky. Please tell me you're not talking about some place in a video game. I'd have chosen the rolling fields of Mulgore, but that's got too many bloodthirsty orcs.
     
19. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-01-09 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-01-09 Pub. Date: 2016-01-09
Image Number: 137449
Caption: Come again? I said, are you seeing anyone? Seriously? … Or casually. Whatever. I mean seriously?! This was the life or death emergency you begged me to talk about? I lost my place in line for this?! Should've waited till after she got her coffee. Well it's ABOUT to be "life and death"!
     
20. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-12-31 place 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-12-31 Pub. Date: 2015-12-31
Image Number: 137201
Caption: Boss, there's a rumor going around that someone lost a $1,000 bill in the café. There are like 200 people out there. Interesting. And I assume they're all looking for the $1,000 bill. I assume they don't want anyone else to know about it before they find it. I assume each of them is buying our food and drink so the others won't suspect they're here with ulterior motives. I wonder who could have possibly spread such a rumor in the first place? Very bad man.
     
Result page:    2  Next  (38 images)