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The Park Comics And Cartoons

collected from fifty of the best cartoonists.

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381. Cartoonist Matt Wuerker  Matt Wuerker's Editorial Cartoons 2013-07-03 park 
Cartoonist(s): Matt Wuerker
Comic/Cartoon: Matt Wuerker's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-12-04 Pub. Date: 2013-07-03
Image Number: 98697
Caption: No Caption (George Seurat's painting, A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte is updated. People now hold a variety of wireless devices.)
     
382. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-12-03 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-12-03 Pub. Date: 2017-12-03
Image Number: 165381
Caption: Triple espresso. Forget it, Uncle Mort. Let's face facts: You're not as young as you used to me. Too much caffeine can literally kill you. Poppycock! Do you know who you're talking to? When we stormed across Europe under Patton, my tank battalion got stuck in the mud during a torrential downpour. Arty Lang switched my canteen full of rainwater with one full of tank gas. So I replaced his tank's timing belt with tree bark and dental floss. That big galoot and I were always pranking each other like that. It was different times. Don't judge. What were we talking about, again? You were ordering the gentle flower chamomile tea.
     
383. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-12-02 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-12-02 Pub. Date: 2017-12-02
Image Number: 165445
Caption: Welcome to the "Ask Sadie" radio hour. You're on, Kenosha. What's your problem?! I'm a grad student pursuing my PhD. in robotics. Under the recent tax plan that passed the House, I'd have to count my tuition waiver as income, even though I never received any actual money. This would put me in a higher tax bracket and I'd have to drop out because I could never afford to pay those taxes. Good riddance, Poindexter. Science is nothing but gobbledygook anyway. Studies have shown that's not the case.
     
384. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-12-01 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-12-01 Pub. Date: 2017-12-01
Image Number: 165444
Caption: Says here the Mediterranean Sea wasn't always there. Big whoop, geek-boy. Tap tap tap tap tap. Says here 6 million years ago, it was a salty desert that was 10,000 feet below sea level … and because of the topography and the air pressure, it was a suffocating, hellish wasteland that got up to 170 degrees. Nothing but tardigrades, misery and extra-sweaty demons could've lived there. Which reminds me, didn't you say your family originally came from the Mediterranean? Which reminds me, when's the last time you brushed your teeth?
     
385. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-30 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-30 Pub. Date: 2017-11-30
Image Number: 165443
Caption: Is it true that celery has negative calories? Sorry, little buddy. There are six calories in one stick of celery. We burn 11 calories per hour chewing. It takes one minute to chew a stick of celery. Divide 11 by 60 and you get a lard-burn rate of only 0.183 calories per stick. So you're still consuming more than five calories per stick. What if I chew the stick for a whole hour straight?
     
386. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-29 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-29 Pub. Date: 2017-11-29
Image Number: 165442
Caption: I forgot to tell you "Happy Black Friday." What do you mean, Billy? Isn't that your holiday? Um … you're asking me that because I'm a merchant … Right? I guess so. Oh. That's good. I was about to ask "what are your parents teaching you?" What part of Africa do "merchants" come from?
     
387. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-28 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-28 Pub. Date: 2017-11-28
Image Number: 165441
Caption: Today on the Ask Sadie Show, we'll be addressing one single topic: "Comeuppance." Specifically, we'll talk about how the tables have finally turned on men who've preyed on women for generations. It reminds me of the last time there was such a dramatic reversal of the social order. The place: France. The year: 1789. Great-great-great-great-great-grandma Sadie had just invented the guillotine. Ironically, she'd invented it as a new way to cut cake.
     
388. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-27 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-27 Pub. Date: 2017-11-27
Image Number: 165440
Caption: Where've you been all weekend, Randy? Tibet. Women are coming out of the woodwork to exact justice on men who sexually harassed them years or decades ago. I wanted to know if I owe anyone an apology. So I climbed the tallest mountain and asked a monk to help me meditate, so I could retrieve crystal-clear memories of every time I ever flirted with a woman. Turns out the monk had to resign because he's sexually harassed someone. What the -- ... wait ... No, I'm actually not surprised anymore.
     
389. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-26 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-26 Pub. Date: 2017-11-26
Image Number: 165380
Caption: Quadruple espresso. Sorry, Uncle Mort. I'm gonna have to cut you off. I'm old! I can drink as much as I want, whenever I want! You think I got this old without knowing what I can and can't handle? Sorry. See?! I told you I -- Zzz. A barista should always follow his instincts
     
390. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-25 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-25 Pub. Date: 2017-11-25
Image Number: 165181
Caption: Randy? What kind of frat parties do you think they had in ancient Rome? I mean, they wore togas every day. That's easy, little buddy. They'd wear an Akkadian loincloth. The Akkadians were just as ancient as the Romans as the Romans are to us. You seem to know a lot about them. That's because the Randy lineage traces its roots back to the Akkadians. Randush "The Rock" Taylor was a popular loincloth model back then. I can trace my family back to Cleveland.
     
391. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-24 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-24 Pub. Date: 2017-11-24
Image Number: 165180
Caption: Minion, I'm ordering you not to talk about alternate histories with the customers. No more "what if feudalism never happened" nonsense. If people start thinking things could've been different, they'll soon start thinking things could've been better. Which could lead to them thinking things can still get better. This "gap between rich and poor" thing is working out in my favor. I don't want your talk of alternate pasts to accidentally create any alternate futures. Very bad man.
     
392. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-23 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-23 Pub. Date: 2017-11-23
Image Number: 165179
Caption: You ever wonder what would've happened if Nintendo had never existed? There'd have been no Mario Bros., and since Sega created Sonic to compete, there'd be no Sonic. And without those, the market wouldn't have been big enough to interest Sony. So … no Playstation. And no Playstation, no Xbox. Several generations of awkward teens would've had to come up with other excuses not to go outside. Sometimes I wonder if it rained where I grew up.
     
393. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-22 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-22 Pub. Date: 2017-11-22
Image Number: 165178
Caption: Disney's trying to buy Fox. If they did that, then all of Marvel's best heroes would be in the MCU. It would be horrible! The whole Marvel cinematic universe is one big story told by dozens of movies. This would, like, triple the amount of movies I'd have to watch! I'd have to watch every X-Men spinoff to make sure I got every reference made in any Thor or Avengers movie, for instance. HOJ. Your definition of "have to" and my definition of "have to" are very different. I'd have to see them all in 3-D. I'd have to get a second job to afford that.
     
394. Cartoonist Steve Kelley  Steve Kelley's Editorial Cartoons 2006-08-11 park 
Cartoonist(s): Steve Kelley
Comic/Cartoon: Steve Kelley's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-11-22 Pub. Date: 2006-08-11
Image Number: 14425
Caption: Security. All Gates. Just think � After this, the lines at Disneyland will be nothing.
     
395. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-21 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-21 Pub. Date: 2017-11-21
Image Number: 165177
Caption: You're on "Ask Sadie." What's your problem?! The Senate. They tried AGAIN to repeal Obamacare, this time by hiding it in the tax bill. When's it going to stop? It's so repetitive. This reminds me of "Groundhog Day," that film where that lovely Mr. Bill Murray went from having a great personality to being a horrible loser. Um ... I don't think that's what you were supposed to take from the movie. There is one adorable deleted scene with a chainsaw. It's on the Youtube.
     
396. Cartoonist Bob Thaves Tom Thaves  Frank and Ernest 2017-11-21 park 
Cartoonist(s): Bob Thaves Tom Thaves
Comic/Cartoon: Frank and Ernest
Viewable Date: 2017-11-21 Pub. Date: 2017-11-21
Image Number: 166743
Caption: Wild Animal Park. I'm writing the wild animal park's location on him --- We should have addressed this elephant in the room a long time ago.
     
397. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-20 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-20 Pub. Date: 2017-11-20
Image Number: 165176
Caption: Armstrong, an unmarked truck just delivered a pallet of mystery meat. Turkey. It doesn't look like turkey. It looks more like some sort of dehydrated pigeon. What's it matter? If we slap it in a sandwich, smother it in "gravy," and label it "turkey," customers won't know the difference. Wait, did you just think quotes around the word gravy? "no."
     
398. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-19 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-19 Pub. Date: 2017-11-19
Image Number: 164536
Caption: Harrison Ford, no question. Tom Selleck. Without a doubt. I don't care if they did offer Selleck the role first, Ford was a much better "Indiana Jones." I don't care if they did offer Selleck the role first, Ford was a much better "Indiana Jones." Ford was ok, but his character was less that manly. What are you talking about? That's ridiculous! Harrison Ford was the definition of eighties manliness! You're telling me the "definition of eighties manliness" could run around the world for weeks and months at a time ... and never once grow anything more than a little stubble? I think maybe you're a little biased about the whole "big giant mustache" issue. Likewise, my patchy little stubbly friend. On matters of great import, even the philosophers must sometimes agree to disagree. Stop!!! All the greatest philosophers had big mustaches, you know.
     
399. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-18 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-18 Pub. Date: 2017-11-18
Image Number: 164887
Caption: Warner Brothers put several whole scenes from "Justice League" up on Youtube. Wrong move. Ruins the mystery. To market a movie like this, one must be a mystery. An enigma. A reserved figure who gives the impression of a beast with rippling muscles lurking just below the veneer of a gentleman. Wait ... isn't that last part from your self-help book "Randy's Guide to Becoming a Mysterious Man"? You'd be surprised at how universally applicable these principles are, little buddy. Anyway, I feel like I've already seen the whole movie. Bored now.
     
400. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-17 park 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-17 Pub. Date: 2017-11-17
Image Number: 164886
Caption: Rudy, it's come to my attention you've been using the restroom three times a day. Of course I have, boss. Did you not see the sign out front that says "restrooms are for customers only"? Seriously? I work here, boss. I've worked here for sixteen years! Good point. Calculating ... average customer spends $20 ... multiply by sixteen ... multiply by 365 ... I'll have to deduct $116,800 from your next several dozen paychecks. Very bad man.
     
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