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Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons

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Result page:    2  3  4  Next  (62 images)


1. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-06-06 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-06-06 Pub. Date: 2017-06-06
Image Number: 159083
Caption: London Staying Calm. Fine ales. Ye Olde Crown and Implant. Fully licentious. 'Course, the only reason I come to the pub is to get away from the bloody Mooslims.
     
2. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-04-01 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-04-01 Pub. Date: 2017-04-01
Image Number: 156638
Caption: A Reminder to All Who Think Baseball Can Only be Played by Millionaires. You can Actually Play Baseball Yourself With Some Friends. It's Quite a Lot of Fun.
     
3. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-03-25 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-03-25 Pub. Date: 2017-03-25
Image Number: 156369
Caption: Form 1040. Department of the Treasury. Internal Revenue Service. U.S. Individual Income Tax Return. 2016. OMB No. 1545-0074. IRS Use only - Keep your greasy fingers off this space. For the year Jan. 1 - Dec. 31, 2016 (And thank God THAT's over!). 2016 ending. 20. See separate instructions. Your Name (Phonetic Spelling). Your Name Used on Dating Service (Attach Recent Photograph). Your Social Security Number. Your gang or mob name (Ex: Louise Pepperoniface, etc) Your Travel Name (Do Not Use Mohammed). Your Other Social Security Number. Address of Your House Before Foreclosure. Crappy apt. you moved to. Bass Ale! How about a cold one right now? (adv.) City, State or Exit from Jersey Turnpike (if you have foreign address, go there and wait for instructions.) Presidential Election Campaign. Checking Here Will Not Make a Damn Bit of Difference. You. Whatshername. Instructions: Drop Dead. Except for Canada, Canada still OK. Eh? Filing Status. Or Fling Status. (It is later than you think.) 1. Single (in the Republican sense of the word). 2. Married Filing Jointly (include all arguments). 3. Married Filing Separately (include sex of partner if you remember). 4. Head of Household (are you the person who sits with head in hands and wonders how you are going to feed all these mistakes, er dependents?) Enter names of dependents. Write small. 5. Qualifying widower. Enter golf handicap. Exemptions. See Publication EXX "Exemption to Exemptions to Exemptions". If more than four exemptions, or if some exemptions have four legs check here. 6a. Yourself. (That's right, you, stupid. If you are not yourself, who did you claim to be?). b. Spouse (or anyone who thinks they should be) (That's a funny word. "spouse") c. Dependents: 1 First name. Nom de plume or AKAs. Phonetic Social Security Number. Last known address? Does this dependent follow instructions? (See instructions). Boxes checked. No. of children who had live-in girlfriends/boyfriends. Had their divorced spouses living with you. You asked to leave but they had no place to go. Add numbers on lines above. (OK to use fingers). d. Total number of exemptions claimed (Round up to nearest 3/5's). Income. Attach forms here. Attach a couple of Andy J's while you're at it, to speed processing. Your ad here! Read by millions! Contact IRS Media. Helpful Hint. We are not going to give you any helpful hints. 7 Wages, salaries, tips, bottle deposits, bribes, free lunches, coins found in couch cushions. 8a Taxable interest. Attach Schedule B. If you don't understand, go to plan B. b. Tax-exempt interest. Much more interesting, isn't it? 9a Ordinary dividends. Nothing special, just Joe the Dividend. b Qualified dividends. Big Whoop. Trump's Rich Friends. 10. Taxable Refunds. Bank error in your favor. Pass GO, collect 200. 11. Alimony received (if that bum ever paid up). 12. Business Income or (loss). Use Schedule EZ come, EZ go. 13. Capital gain of (loss). Include your share of the national debt. 14. Other gains or (losses). Check box if you are just making stuff up. 15a. IRA distributions. b. Amount you had with Lehman. 16a. Pensions and annuities. b Amount with State of Illinois. 17. Rental real estate, royalties, partnerships (Use Schedule X to report missing partner). 18. Farm Income or (loss), Attach Schedule F (Do not include the funny farm). 19. Unemployment compensation (Amazing isn't it? You get taxed on this, too). 20a. Social Security benefits b. Taxable amount. 21. Other Income. (Bake sales, washing cars, baby-sitting, bingo games, don't hide anything). 22. This is your total income. Unless you are General Electric. If so write zero. Adjusted Gross Income. Remember you can file this form electronically, using your computer, and really mess things up. 23 Educator expenses (Spankings, noogies, butt-kicking). 24 Certain business expenses that you as a mere nobody have no business knowing about. Just keep moving. 25 Health savings account deduction. (May make you sick.) 26 Moving expenses. (See instructions). 27 Instruction tax. 28 Self-employment tax. 29 Self-enjoyment tax. 30 Penalty for early withdrawal (One-half of self-enjoyment tax). 31a Alimony paid. Rat out spouse's SSAN. 32 USSR tax (Useless Social Security Recipients). 33 Student loan interest (Do not include English majors). 34 Lack of interest in being a student. 35. Add up lines one to a million, divide by twice the total sum of your weight in Chinese running shoes. If greater than one-half of total something, go forth and multiply. 36. This is your adjusted gross income (Adjusted? We mean disgusted.) Now we can go to page two, tra-la. Last thought: Any money or thing of worth laying around? Better send it in. Just in case. Hey, you never know. Cat. No. 11320B. Form 1040 (2016).
     
4. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-12-13 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-12-13 Pub. Date: 2016-12-13
Image Number: 152281
Caption: Look, Putin is corrupting vote in America. Good! Why should we be the only ones to suffer? Pravda. US voters screwed by Russian hackers. Shut up. - Putin.
     
5. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-10-29 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-10-29 Pub. Date: 2016-10-29
Image Number: 150625
Caption: Well, lemme tell you what I'm gonna do. I am not voting for some Republican loudmouth, and I am not voting for some re-tread establishment liberal. No sir! I am voting for the only person I know I can trust - Me! Oooh … a selfie. ?
     
6. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-10-12 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-10-12 Pub. Date: 2016-10-12
Image Number: 149844
Caption: I'll tell you one thing. This never would have happened if Mitch McConnell were still alive. The Republican Party. Ouija. Happy times are … Members only.
     
7. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-09-29 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-09-29 Pub. Date: 2016-09-29
Image Number: 149280
Caption: The Claw! Dodge! Wells Fargo & Co. What? You only have one account? $ $
     
8. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-06-20 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-06-20 Pub. Date: 2016-06-20
Image Number: 146004
Caption: New television possibly starting this fall. The West Wingnut. How's that wall comin' along, Jose? The only thing we have to fear is ... um ... well.
     
9. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-06-05 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-06-05 Pub. Date: 2016-06-05
Image Number: 144419
Caption: McCain Endorses Trump. Great to have you aboard, John! Only parachute on plane McCain.
     
10. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-05-25 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-05-25 Pub. Date: 2016-05-25
Image Number: 143897
Caption: President Trump. Ok, senator, you're fired. You can't fire me. Yes I can. I am the president. No, you can't. I was elected. What? Only the people of my state can fire me. Buzzle-wuzzle. Heh-heh. I'll sue you! I'll sue you back!
     
11. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-05-22 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-05-22 Pub. Date: 2016-05-22
Image Number: 143795
Caption: Trump Asking for Donations from the Wealthy. We understood you were self-financing. In fact that was the only thing we like about you. Make Trump Great Again and again and again and again. Make America great again.
     
12. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-05-19 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-05-19 Pub. Date: 2016-05-19
Image Number: 143624
Caption: New members. The GOP. Trump. Members only. Who am I? Hell, man, I live here now.
     
13. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-03-23 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-03-23 Pub. Date: 2016-03-23
Image Number: 141038
Caption: Republicans Deal with Reality. Edward says there's only one way to save the Republican party from Donald Trump ... Vote for Hillary Clinton.
     
14. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2015-08-25 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2015-08-25 Pub. Date: 2015-08-25
Image Number: 131750
Caption: I assured him this was only temporary. But it didn't seem to cheer him up. Western markets recover. Ha! Ha! Comics. Xi's Taxi. Beijing-Shanghai. Special rates.
     
15. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2015-08-12 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2015-08-12 Pub. Date: 2015-08-12
Image Number: 131220
Caption: Mr. Trump, our research department says the only thing you could do to get more attention is to draw smiley faces in lipstick on your butt and run naked down Broadway waving American flags. Ok Your style. Computers. TKTS. Sony. Broadway. 47 St. Don't even think. Hot dogs $16. NYC. News.
     
16. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2015-08-10 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2015-08-10 Pub. Date: 2015-08-10
Image Number: 131110
Caption: Trump Sleeps. Of course I was right about that but the stupid reporters don't realize I am smarter than them and they fail and I win and that's why People love me cause I am a genius. I am worth eleven billion dollars and I always come out ahead and Bonk! Marla gave me this. She said it was the only way I'd get any sleep.
     
17. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2015-03-12 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2015-03-12 Pub. Date: 2015-03-12
Image Number: 124363
Caption: Lieutenant Tom Cotton With His Men in the Iraq War. All right, men, follow me Actually, sir, Corporal Smith here has just written a letter to the other side and we're all going to sign it not only is "Lieutenant" Cotton misguided, but he will be gone in a few months, replaces by somebody else who may have different ideas ... Better put in something about the Constitution ...
     
18. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2015-01-24 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2015-01-24 Pub. Date: 2015-01-24
Image Number: 122635
Caption: Senator Rubio in Iowa. Jose, this here's Senator Rubio. He's gonna send all the illegals back home. Should I vote for him? Only if you want to get up at four in the morning and do farm work for minimum wage.
     
19. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2014-11-20 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2014-11-20 Pub. Date: 2014-11-20
Image Number: 119465
Caption: Young Frenchman Leaves Paris to Join Islamic State Rebels. Once there he realizes that: 1. There is no wine. 2. There is only one kind of cheese. 3. The women are all wrapped in bags. So Eh You've seen a woman, eh? Nudge - nudge, wink-wink Oh, say no more ...
     
20. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2014-10-14 only 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2014-10-14 Pub. Date: 2014-10-14
Image Number: 117797
Caption: Father Dooley explains it all to you. So b'now I'm sure y'have heard that th' holy father has changed his opinion on homosexuals. And y'all know that God talks to th' holy father on a regular basis. So y'must realize that th' Pope is only followin' orders ... It's God that's makin' an awful horrible mistake. Have ye lost yer mind up there? Confessin' poofters? It that what it's come to?
     
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