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Rudy Park

Comics and cartoons about men.

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301. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-11-25 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-11-25 Pub. Date: 2014-11-25
Image Number: 119413
Caption: Did you know that Solange Knowles married a guy who's 22 years older than her? So what? That's not unusual. When I was a young lass, much older gentlemen courted me all the time. Albert was 40 years older than I was. Winston was 45 years my senior. W.E.B. was half a century older than I was. You should've seen the time they all ran into each other at my house. Albert scrawled E=MC2 on Winston's forehead with the last of W.E.B.'s mustache wax.
     
302. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-11-22 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-11-22 Pub. Date: 2014-11-22
Image Number: 119147
Caption: Think I'll be a more effective alpha male if I learn to play pool? That's on of those things you always see an alpha male do: stand around a pool hall polishing his stick and racking up the balls. … Sizing up his shot, like he's secretly a geometric wizard who's about to make the whole world line up the way he wants it to just with one whack. Or maybe I should take up darts, where I myself become an extension of the missile I'm launching. Any sport in the bar family works.
     
303. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-11-11 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-11-11 Pub. Date: 2014-11-11
Image Number: 118876
Caption: It's important to women that a man has a good relationship with his mother. Why's that? Because how a man treats his mother is a good indicator of how he'll treat a girlfriend. That's why I created an app that calls your phone and displays a photo of you hugging your mom whenever a gorgeous lady is within three feet of you. It also displays a nice, sweet lady whenever you're within three feet of your mom.
     
304. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-11-06 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-11-06 Pub. Date: 2014-11-06
Image Number: 118566
Caption: I don’t know, man, I think you've taken it a little too far, divvying people up like this. Nonsense. It's a delicate balance. A little depression is good for business. Stimulates the sale of comfort foods. But too much depression, and half of my patrons won't even get out of bed, let alone buy anything. What do you mean "stop"? All I said to that democrat was "nanny-nanny-boo-boo." Yes, but you're in the non-gloating section.
     
305. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-11-05 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-11-05 Pub. Date: 2014-11-05
Image Number: 118565
Caption: I thought you'd be more excited because of all the extra power the republicans have now. Those communists? If you want to see me excited, check back with me on December 7, 2037, at 6:42 AM. According to my calculations, that's when the cabal of industrialists who REALLY control the world will dispense with the pretense of "government." We'll just turn on everyone's secretly implanted compliance-chips. You calculated that? Way back when I opened my first lemonade stand. It's in my business plan under "endgame."
     
306. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-11-01 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-11-01 Pub. Date: 2014-11-01
Image Number: 118268
Caption: Did you hear Sadie's show today? Of course not, little buddy. Randy's man-rule #68.1: "Never admit you know anything about what the people you know do for a living." It's the first page in the chapter titled: "Never Display More Interest In A Person Than That Person Shows In You." Do you know what I do for a living? I don't even know your name, little buddy.
     
307. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-10-31 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-10-31 Pub. Date: 2014-10-31
Image Number: 118267
Caption: Akron, you're on "Ask Sadie." What's your problem?! My son is a shiftless goof-up who couldn’t find his rump with both hands. Really? … Well then, you're a lucky man. There is nothing more validating than having offspring who can't measure up to you. Enjoy your daily reminder of your unsurpassed excellence. That's true. I never accidentally burned down MY old man's house.
     
308. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-10-26 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-10-26 Pub. Date: 2014-10-26
Image Number: 117421
Caption: You've reached Randy The Love Doctor. What ails you? It's an emergency, Doctor Randy! I see a beautiful, sexy, confident, smiling lady at the end of the bar. Hold on, she … yeah she totally just looked at me. WHAT DO I DO? Absolutely nothing. It took you 6.2 seconds to tell me she looked at you and to ask me what you should do about it. My exhaustive research has proven a man has only six seconds to respond affirmatively to a look of interest. After that, he'll either lose his nerve or whatever response he gives will seem rehearsed. Your best move now is Randy's Recovery #67: First, gaze off into the distance as if you're a tortured soul deep in self-reflection ... I can do that.
     
309. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-10-21 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-10-21 Pub. Date: 2014-10-21
Image Number: 117983
Caption: Sadie, you were around in the sixties … is "Mad Men" accurate? That depends. Are you genuinely curious about history, or is this your oafish way of calling me old? Genuinely curious. Honest. All right … They took liberties, but they got the general tone right. And how accurate was "Bonanza"?
     
310. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-10-16 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-10-16 Pub. Date: 2014-10-16
Image Number: 117700
Caption: I think the man in the corner may have Ebola. He's drinking hot tea. Everyone knows that people who have sore throats drink hot tea. A sore throat is one of the first symptoms of the Ebola. Don’t you think it's time to quarantine his booth? Let's see if he asks for honey.
     
311. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-10-07 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-10-07 Pub. Date: 2014-10-07
Image Number: 117416
Caption: I don’t know how I feel about the final "Hobbit" movie coming out. It's the end of an era. Try again. That is not at all what I meant when I said ladies respect a man who's a thinker. I may not buy the iWatch. After all, what is time, really? Decent. But could be better.
     
312. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-09-15 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-09-15 Pub. Date: 2014-09-15
Image Number: 116548
Caption: Boss, why'd you post a sign out front that reads "Please Do Not Bring Your Guns Into This Establishment"? I've worked at this café for 13 years, and I don’t remember anyone ever bringing a gun. So why post the sign? The media's been calling all day asking what's going on. I'll have to dock your pay for the time you waste answering your own questions. Very bad man.
     
313. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-09-14 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-09-14 Pub. Date: 2014-09-14
Image Number: 115615
Caption: Come in, minion. What's up, boss? I'm writing a novel. It's a thriller about an intrepid café owner who discovers a map to the lost coffee bean of the ancients. The bean is hidden in crumbling catacombs beneath a booby-trapped Mayan temple. Braving an almost certain grizzly death ... ... the cafe owner sends his obsequious minion to liberate the bean. Wait ... what? But the story really gets going when the evil minion tries filing for workman's comp just because he loses a few toes. Can the brave owner have his government stooge dismiss the complaint before his insurance premium is affected? Stay tuned! I don't think I get one-percenter fiction, boss.
     
314. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-09-12 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-09-12 Pub. Date: 2014-09-12
Image Number: 116262
Caption: Did you hear Sadie's show today. DID I. My favorite part was when she made that construction worker who called in cry. She's a rare talent. It's amazing how she can peel grown men and women like an onion, find what makes them tick and squash it like a bug. Is she still around? Smile and assume she is, if you know what's good for you. Sadie sure topped herself today.
     
315. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-09-11 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-09-11 Pub. Date: 2014-09-11
Image Number: 116261
Caption: Caller, let me stop you right there. Your problem is you're a doormat! You need to march right back in there and tell him you don’t take orders from any man, and if he wants dinner he can fix it himself. You don’t think Denny's would fire me for that? NO FREE ADVERTISING!!! The Denny's at 9287 Bushmill Road, I mean.
     
316. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-09-09 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-09-09 Pub. Date: 2014-09-09
Image Number: 116259
Caption: This is Dr. Sadie. What's your question, caller? How do I know if a guy likes me? There's one telltale sign a man is interested in you: HE WEEPS WHEN YOU MERCILESSLY MOCK HIM AND ALL THAT HE HOLDS DEAR. It also weeds out the "men" who are afraid to cry. Thank you, Dr. Sadie.
     
317. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-09-07 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-09-07 Pub. Date: 2014-09-07
Image Number: 115314
Caption: Today's MAN LESSON is "The Art of Promising." I'm ready. Part one: Never … promise … anything. Wait … what do you mean? Pretend you're the lady. Ask me to promise you something. Ok … (ahem) … Promise me you won't ever even LOOK at another woman? A man would have to be CRAZY to look at another woman when he COULD be looking at the most beautiful woman in the world. And I'm not crazy. Notice, if you will, not only is there a complete absence of a promise ... ... there are also at least four iron-clad loopholes built in. Can you identify them? This is worse than math to me.
     
318. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-08-30 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-08-30 Pub. Date: 2014-08-30
Image Number: 115614
Caption: @sexygirl4u and I had a falling out last night. I hit "like" on a revealing photo she'd posted. But then I worried that was too forward of me. So I hit "like" on all 89 of her less suggestive photos so she wouldn’t think I was a pervert. Then she blocked me. I just don't understand women, I guess. I'm starting to.
     
319. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-08-25 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-08-25 Pub. Date: 2014-08-25
Image Number: 115609
Caption: Boss, the customers can hear you cackling maniacally. I've topped myself, minion. It's not enough to run ads that tout our own excellence; we have to simultaneously tear down the competition. Behold my masterpiece. "100 percent of those who drink Coffee King's coffee will die." Best part is it's technically true.
     
320. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-08-17 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-08-17 Pub. Date: 2014-08-17
Image Number: 114438
Caption: EPIPHANY!!! Uh oh. I'm running this as a communist utopia! Really? You mean … … You're going to start distributing muffins to patrons based on your need instead of our means? No, I mean I've BEEN running it as a communist utopia. I've charged everyone exactly the same for their muffins, when I should have been means-testing. If you can afford to pay $650 for a muffin, then by Ayn Rand, that's exactly what I should charge you. Pardon me, I've got a customer. One muffin, please. I'll have to see your W-2 or 1099.
     
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