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Result page:    2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  11  12  Next  (222 images)

1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-03-21 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-03-21 Pub. Date: 2018-03-21
Image Number: 169628
Caption: Is it all just a waste of time? I don't know what you mean, bruh. I wrote an article called Mr. President, if you want to look like you're Russia's stooge, firing your Secretary of State right after he strongly criticizes Russia is a great way to do it. Just seconds after I posted it, thousands of people attacked me on Twitter, and I've been debating them ever since. But now I'm not sure any of them were actual people. If they was actual people, they'da tuned you out after that long-@#$ headline, like I did.
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-03-02 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-03-02 Pub. Date: 2018-03-02
Image Number: 168931
Caption: Whachoodoin', bruh? You been on youtube all day. I'm arguing with some Ukrainian lady who posted a video accusing me of smearing her country by pointing out its growing neo Nazi problem. She said Ukraine's like any other country: minorities and foreigners are safe as long as they stick to the city center. And stick to the sunny side of the street in the city center. And stick to the hotel. And avoid the lobby ... I always avoid lobbies. That's where they get you ... and avoid room service.
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-12-19 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-12-19 Pub. Date: 2017-12-19
Image Number: 166284
Caption: I went out with this book agent last week and told him some stories about work. Then he tried to get me to write a novel based on it. Awesome! I've written three, you know. If you need any advice, just come to me. I could walk you through it. Share my expertise. Writing a novel is a long, hard process. Takes about six months to a year. I'll guide you through it, 'cause you're my best friends and I love you. I finished it last week. I hate you with a passion.
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-11-19 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-11-19 Pub. Date: 2017-11-19
Image Number: 164467
Caption: Great-looking hair, made easy. Just dye. We now return to our program. How much time do I have to save the kitten, bring Timmy his inhaler, and defuse the nuclear bomb? You have a lot less time than you did before you started that sentence. We'll be back after these messages ... I'm rally psyched Little Tyrant Pizza's bringing the flavor with its new pecan guacamole dipping sauce! A guy, a beach, a skateboard. A girl bouncing in slow motion. And these corn chips that have nothing to do with any of that. Buy them. Six other commercials that go on so long that you don't remember what show you're watching. Going back to Netflixing everything. And now back to our show ... What were we doing? Defusing something or other, I think.
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-11-10 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-11-10 Pub. Date: 2017-11-10
Image Number: 164653
Caption: 1982. When I grow up, I want to be a single dad, Lemont. You mean "single mom"? Are you kidding? Compare "Alice" or "Gloria" or "One Day at a Time" with "Diff'rent Strokes" or "Silver Spoons." Single moms all struggle for long hours in dead-end, low-wage jobs. But single dads are all millionaires who don't seem to need jobs at all. My goal in life is to prove tv wrong, is what I'm saying. Fred Sanford's a single dad and he's always having heart attacks.
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-10-26 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-10-26 Pub. Date: 2017-10-26
Image Number: 164150
Caption: Dear Lemont Brown, This is an attempt to collect a debt … for something you don't remember having bought. And even if you do remember, you bought it so long ago that odds are you haven't kept any records proving you already paid for it. Sign here and include a check to admit defeat and make this all go away. Lemont Brown.
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-10-21 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-10-21 Pub. Date: 2017-10-21
Image Number: 163907
Caption: I can't remember how to divide, Clyde. Say what? Long division. I don't remember how to do it. I got an "A" in calculus back in high school. I got a "4" on the AP test. But let 20 years go by, and all of a sudden I have no idea how to even begin to divide 4,852.8 by 297.492. It take most people more than 20 years to forget how to use a calculator, bruh. You might wanna get y'self checked out.
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-10-11 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-10-11 Pub. Date: 2017-10-11
Image Number: 163630
Caption: Bruh, you gotta stop writing about "Star Track Discovery." Don't nobody like it. Get over it. "Trek." And it's a great show! It's just a vocal minority online that keep coming up with ridiculous reasons to hate it. They decided long before they ever saw it was gonna be horrible, and now they just don't want to be wrong. It's textbook case of confirmation bias! I knew you wasn't gonna make no sense, an' I was right.
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-10-08 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-10-08 Pub. Date: 2017-10-08
Image Number: 162900
Caption: Big L, you seen a doctor yet 'bout that heart attack you had? I didn't have a "heart attack," Clyde. All I had was pain in my arm, between my shoulder blades, in my chest, jaw and upper abdomen. Plus I was dizzy, fatigues and had heartburn. That could've been anything. And anyway, I took care of it myself. I started biking, gave up red meat, etc ... just in case. Anyway, I don't have health insurance. I earn too much for Medicaid and too little pay the Obamacare premiums. I got a solution for you, bruh ... Ok ... As long as it doesn't involve identity theft, Fake IDs and possible jail time. Hm ... well, then I got a different solution for you ... As long as it doesn't involve sneaking into another country. Well ... then I got a different solution ...
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-06-11 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-06-11 Pub. Date: 2017-06-11
Image Number: 158398
Caption: Man, Lemont … how long's it been? Twenty years? Just about. You still working at Pigville Pork Burgers? Nah … I got a job as the Candorville Chronicles White House correspondent. Then I went on to found Candorville.com, the internet's seventh largest source for news and opinion. Oh. That's cool. That's cool. How do you not know this? We're Facebook friends. I post links to my articles every day. We were roommates all through college, and you don't even read my updates? Facebook's for reading you-stuff? I thought it was just for posting me-stuff. I'm sorry, man. I feel horrible. As you should ... Anyway, you still working as a roadie for Hootie and the Blowfish?
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-06-06 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-06-06 Pub. Date: 2017-06-06
Image Number: 158826
Caption: To: Rudy Park. From: Lemont Brown. What're you up to these days, Brother Park? That depends. If we're talking the SimCity game I began back when we were in college in '93 … I'm up to 14 linked quad-core RAID devices that take up the whole basement. That's not what I meant. It's costing me a fortune, but I've been playing the same game for so long that I'm pretty sure my 59 billion Sims have become sentient and worship me as a deity. I meant how do you spend your time these days? Working. I've got 59 billion mouths to feed. Tap tap tap tap.
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-05-20 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-05-20 Pub. Date: 2017-05-20
Image Number: 158081
Caption: Ain't nobody know what they be doin', Big L. What do you mean? Media be talkin' 'bout Russia Russia Russia all day long. But they ain't marketing it right. How come Netflix don't have "Red Dawn" an' "Twins" an' all them other Cold War movies up on they front page right now? None of this is entertainment!!! Whachoo mean? Danny DeVito an' Arnold Schwarzenegger bein' twins is pure entertainment.
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-05-07 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-05-07 Pub. Date: 2017-05-07
Image Number: 157070
Caption: America sure is great agin, I'll tell ya what. After eight long years of darkness, we're finally seein' the light agin. I meant "darkness" as in the metaphorical sense. You know … as in wickedness, evilness or malignant stupidness. I by no means meant anything racial, and you implyin' I did ... well, that sorta assumption-makin' is why you fellas lost the election. Furd. Why are you assuming that I, myself, am not a Trump voter? Well, dang ... you got me on that one. I mean, I'm not ... but that's not the point.
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-04-27 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-04-27 Pub. Date: 2017-04-27
Image Number: 157287
Caption: Clyde, if something ever happens to me … Don’t worry, bruh. I'll take you kid an' raise him up for you. I'll teach him all he need to know about life. He'll be the baddest two-year-old on the block. Ain't nobody gonna mess with him. I'll also teach him erethang you woulda taught him: I'll make him watch Star Track an' Doctor Boo an' some @#$% like that. Long as he ain't a snitch, we'll be cool. I was just going to say "call Susan."
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-04-20 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-04-20 Pub. Date: 2017-04-20
Image Number: 157015
Caption: You know why 'Star Trek' is off the air? Because no one wants to see the liberal Communist utopian propaganda. Think about it: Nobody needs money. Everyone's basic needs for food and shelter are met by the government. What incentive does anyone have to accomplish anything if they're not scared about ending up hungry and homeless? Well ... Boredom's an incentive. Notice how they all wear pajamas all day long. They're work pajamas.
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-04-15 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-04-15 Pub. Date: 2017-04-15
Image Number: 156723
Caption: 1982. I don't like going to the doctor. My Uncle Benny went to the doctor and never came back. Plus, there are lots of sick people there. How is it a good ideas to go sit in a waiting room where everyone has the plague? Plus, I believe in the Vulcan philosophy of mind over matter. If Spock could trance himself free of those killer alien spores, I could do that too. You're going to die young, Lemont. No, I'm going to live long and prosper.
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-03-30 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-03-30 Pub. Date: 2017-03-30
Image Number: 156200
Caption: I'm coming out with a new book, Clyde. It's called "I Have Over 1,000 Facebook Friends and Only 50 of Them Bought My Latest Book … I have 257,000 Twitter Followers, and Only 5,000 of Them Bought My Latest Book … and I Have One Allegedly Close Friend Sitting Right Next to Me and He's Never Bought Any of My Books." That's 'cause you titles be way too long, bruh. Colorblind Ed.
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-03-24 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-03-24 Pub. Date: 2017-03-24
Image Number: 155917
Caption: This is the Ask Sadie Radio Hour. "Lemont" in Candorville, you're on. Yeah. I'm moving to Canada to be with a woman I love. I don't mean right now, I mean maybe next month. Or six months from now. Or maybe next year. Anyway, I'm definitely going. Maybe. Please don't tell me you want to know if you're moving too fast. Of course not. I want to know if I should consider wondering if I'm moving too fast. A Train.
19. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-03-23 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-03-23 Pub. Date: 2017-03-23
Image Number: 155916
Caption: Whachoo gon' move to Canada for, bruh? So what you got some perfect girl up there. That ain't gonna last. Either she gonna get tired of you, or you gonna get tired of her. Or the magic gonna wear off an' you'll find out she ain't "perfect" noway. Only way to keep a perfect relationship perfect is to end it while it still be perfect. That's why your life full of failure, an' my life be full of perfection. Stop making nonsense seem like sense!
20. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-03-16 long 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-03-16 Pub. Date: 2017-03-16
Image Number: 155655
Caption: Everything's good. I'm happy doctor. Dr. Noodle. Excellent! That's great news! As long as your happiness is genuine. As long as its not actually denial. Or as long as it doesn't cause you to become complacent. Nope. Genuine happiness over here. Let's schedule an extra sessions so we can find out if that's the case. M.A.
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