We'll have the Christmas feast for one. She means for two. He'll have a small bowl of cold oatmeal. No I won't! I'll have that Christmas feast! The turkey â€¦ the stuffing, the yams, the pumpkin pie a la mode with whipped cream, the extra-thick, brandy-infused eggnogg, the cranberry sauce, the succulent ham ... the reindeer jerky, the frosted sugar cookies with butter flakes, and the noose-shaped chocolate cupcakes with cheese filling. He'll have half a saltine cracker. You know what the doctors said, dear. They said your suffering is good for my blood pressure. I'll take my feast to go! Good move.