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Candorville

Comics and cartoons about holes and holing.

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Result page:     (16 images)


1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-04-11 hole 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-04-11 Pub. Date: 2019-04-11
Image Number: 177116
Caption: You know the worst part of renting instead of owning a home? Aside from not being able to create generational wealth for your children and all your descendants, I mean. You don't really have a good reason to hang out in Home Depot. You don't get to tear down walls and dig a lot of holes when you rent. Don't put limits on y'self, Big L. I tore down a wall just last week, I don't give a @#$%.
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-05-05 hole 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-05-05 Pub. Date: 2018-05-05
Image Number: 171057
Caption: Your boy George Berkeley be trippin', Big L. Thinkin' he proved the existence of God. He argued the only thing we can be sure exist is our own minds. But because there got to be things in the universe we ain't ever thought of … that must mean there must be some all-seeing God out there, in whose mind erething exist. Later philosophers poked holes in that theory and what have you done, Clyde? That between my mind an' the big mind in the sky.
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-04-08 hole 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-04-08 Pub. Date: 2018-04-08
Image Number: 169718
Caption: Dr. Stephen Hawking saved my life, doc. How so? Dr. Noodle. I was in a deep dark depression. I wanted to end it all. I was about to. But just then, through my tv, I heard this computerized voice announcing his discovery about black holes. They're the most powerful things there are. But he's discovered that theoretically, they lose mass over time, until they're just ... gone. He said things can get out of a black hole both on the outside and possibly to another universe. So if you feel you are in a black hole, don't give up ... there's a way out. His loss is a moral and intellectual void that'll never be filled. Well that's depressing ... and ... now I'm ok.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-03-22 hole 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-03-22 Pub. Date: 2018-03-22
Image Number: 169629
Caption: I think I may have just witnessed the singularity, Susan. And it's freaking me out. You mean singularity as in black hole? No, I mean as in the moment when artificial intelligence becomes smarter than human beings. Last night, I witnessed what I'm sure were two Russian bots arguing with each other. How do you know they weren't actual people? They politely came to an understanding. We're doomed.
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-09-15 hole 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-09-15 Pub. Date: 2017-09-15
Image Number: 162601
Caption: Six months, bruh. Six months till they start deporting 800,000 "dreamers" to countries they don't know how to live in. I dug a hole in my closet an' I got canned food. I'm ready. Ready for what? Ain't you never read "Anne Frank's Diary"? What are you asking: Have I read it, or have I never read it? You and your double negatives. Ain't you never heard of the Underground Railroad? Now you're just messing with me.
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-08-06 hole 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-08-06 Pub. Date: 2017-08-06
Image Number: 160565
Caption: Your latest article was a little confusing, Lemont. What's confusing about my having solved Fermi's paradox? I've single-handedly explained how the universe could be filled with civilization, even though we've seen no evidence them. Did you know there's a possibility our universe exists within a black hole? ... and every black hole in our universe may contain an entire universe of its own? I've heard that. And did you know that people ultimately just can't stand those who are different from them? Don't you see, Susan? There is no paradox. When a civilization advances far enough, it doesn't fly to other stars. It thinks much bigger. It creates a black hole and vanishes into it so it can have a whole universe to itself. They could shape it and write its natural laws however they want. The Berniezoidians could have a whole universe full of single-payer healthcare, ... and the Trumpmagans could have a whole universe full of no undocumented immigrants. Oh. I was just confused about the part where you wrote "The Trumpmagans still insist Mexico will pay for the event horizon."
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-06-19 hole 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-06-19 Pub. Date: 2017-06-19
Image Number: 159388
Caption: Breaking news! The White House is urging Russia to intervene in the North Pole's civil war to secure the release of hostages held by elfin rebels. Click … Canadian homeowners are urged to check for bunny holes before mowing their laws, after a gruesome ... Click. After seven male senators in a row interrupted the witness' answers, Senator McCain scolded Sen. Kamala Harris for doing the exact same thing. Click. Gilligaaaan ... the Skipper tooooooo.
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-11-15 hole 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-11-15 Pub. Date: 2016-11-15
Image Number: 151017
Caption: Don't do it, Lemont. On my earth, I reported EXACTLY what I saw on election night. I posted it ALL on my news site. I wrote about how all the people in this bar took Trump's win. But I also wrote about how this run-down hole in the wall is the nexus of the multiverse. Here, you'll run unto the other yous who've made different choices, who came from world's that made different choices. All the roads not taken lead here. I lost most of my readers, and the girl of my dreams took out a restraining order. On the bright side, I forgot all about that when I met dinosaur me.
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-11-05 hole 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-11-05 Pub. Date: 2016-11-05
Image Number: 150476
Caption: 1982. What are you gonna be in 2012? I've narrowed it down to two options. If we don't blow ourselves up, I'll be a cyborg captain of a starship, hunting for black holes I can use to travel back in time and capture dinosaurs. If we DO blow ourselves up, I'll wear leather pants and roam the radioactive wasteland fighting mutants in order to bring a bucket of water and a little bit of peace to grateful orphans. It's good you have something to fall back on. Momma said that's important.
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-04-07 hole 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-04-07 Pub. Date: 2016-04-07
Image Number: 141504
Caption: Your boy George Berkeley be trippin', Big L. Thinkin' he proved the existence of God. He argued the only thing we can be sure exist in our own minds. But because there got to be things in the universe we ain't never thought of … that must mean there must be some all-seeing "God" out there, in whose mind erething exist. Later philosophers poked holes in that theory and what have you done, Clyde? That between my mind an' the big mind in the sky.
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-02-08 hole 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-02-08 Pub. Date: 2015-02-08
Image Number: 122070
Caption: I read that cops in Miami Beach were using six mugshots of black people for target practice. My first thought was "That's so #$% racist!" But then the police chief spoke about it. He said it's to make sure cops are able to tell different black people apart. So my second thought was: "That's a really good thing." Then maybe cops won't kill innocent people by accident. But then my third thought was "Wait a minute ... all six mugshots have bullet holes in them." Why can't I ever learn to just stop at my second thought, like most people? You'd better never go to Miami Beach, Lemont.
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-05-14 hole 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-05-14 Pub. Date: 2014-05-14
Image Number: 111231
Caption: Dr. Dre bought a $50 million mansion. Who does that? If you have $50 million lying around, you have options. You can make people's lives better. You can create jobs. … Or you can blow it on a house. Who in his right mind would choose to blow it on a house? You jus' jealous you don't have $50 million to throw down a hole.
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-11-02 hole 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-11-02 Pub. Date: 2012-11-02
Image Number: 89251
Caption: You've reached Maricopa County, Arizona. For tourist information, press "one." To ask why we keep sending "remember to vote" flyers that list the correct election date in English, but the incorrect date in Spanish … … Press "two." (Two.) Be sure to visit the Hole-In-The-Rock, at Papago Park. It's the biggest hole in a rock this side of the Mississippi!
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-12-03 hole 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-12-03 Pub. Date: 2011-12-03
Image Number: 73561
Caption: 1982. What are you gonna be in 2012? I've narrowed it down to two options. If we don't blow ourselves up, I'll be a cyborg captain of a starship, hunting for black holes I can use to travel back in time and capture dinosaurs. If we do blow ourselves up, I'll wear leather pants and roam the radioactive wasteland fighting mutants in order to bring a bucket of water and a little bit of peace to grateful orphans. It's good you have something to fall back on. Momma said that's important.
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-10-14 hole 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-10-14 Pub. Date: 2008-10-14
Image Number: 27399
Caption: Anderson Cooper's Battle Journal, Day 12: How are we going to rescue John McCain's lost honor from that prison camp with this crew of misfits? Asian Tax Shelter. Wesley Snipes and Chuck Norris. I won't even go there. Then there's Lemont Brown, the other embedded journalist. "Big L" is from some urban spit hole... Snap! ...and I think the light and space of Vietnam really put a zap on his brain. What in God's name is that crazy smell? Trees.
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-09-23 hole 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-09-23 Pub. Date: 2008-09-23
Image Number: 26923
Caption: John McCain's office. If you're calling to ask why we ran an ad saying Obama wanted to teach kindergarteners about sex… …when he really sought to protect them from sexual predators… Press "one". Boop. John McCain had to face much worse things than lies when he was a captive in a stinking rat hole in Vietnam! Oh, for the love of...
     
Result page:     (16 images)