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Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons

Comics and cartoons about hearts.

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Result page:     (11 images)


1. Cartoonist Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2018-03-05 heart 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2018-03-05 Pub. Date: 2018-03-05
Image Number: 169359
Caption: Beyond the Paleo. Find modern life emasculating? Try a pseudo-scientific diet! Rarr! Caveman no eat grains! Never mind that actual prehistoric people ate hugely varied diets. Cartoon cavemen are more marketable. The Paleo Cave. Meat Cozies 50% oof. Yes we have 20 flavors of squirrel jerky! Paleo not enough? There's the all-meat diet (for real). Or go even further ... I don't eat no grass-fed sissy cows! Only cannibal cows! Dudebro Ranch. 100% beef-fed beef. Coming soon: Caveman healthcare! Doc, I think I'm having a heart attack. Sorry. Life is nasty, brutish and short!
     
2. Cartoonist Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2015-07-20 heart 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2015-07-20 Pub. Date: 2015-07-20
Image Number: 130133
Caption: Natural Gasbags. People who live near fracking sites have a much higher risk of hospitalization for heart disease and neurological disorders.* Hey kids! Hope you're enjoying the cheap transitional energy! It's an inconvenient truth overlooked by many a "serious" thinker. I'm no angry environmentalist. Fracking has been a blessing! Not near fracking, thanks to New York's ban. If only these people had to live like those whose lives have been ruined by fracking ... No way you'll be able to sell this place. But on the plus side, there's a hospital nearby! Then let's see how long it takes them to become angry protesters. No fracking near pundits. Go melt someone else's brain! *NIH Medline Plus, 7/15/15.
     
3. Cartoonist Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2009-10-19 heart 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2009-10-19 Pub. Date: 2009-10-19
Image Number: 90711
Caption: Slowpoke. Slowpoke Euro-Notes. You may encounter the exotic … "Bidets" are a French invention for catching travelers' laundry drippings. Non-QWERTY keyboards in Moroccan-run internet cafes will BLOW YOUR MIND. All I want is the letter "P"! FOOM! Frugal Korner. In Paris, make you own cafe: Le Petit Budget. You. Fabulous view of people spending more than you. 3 Euro bottle of wine. This is the new international symbol for "food that is affordable for Americans." Kebab. ... And the pathetic: Psychologists still cannot explain the impulse that causes some tourists to buy jester hats. I (heart) London. Fun Fact: Michelangelo's "David" is really a giant naked man! Hubba hubba!
     
4. Cartoonist Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2008-12-01 heart 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2008-12-01 Pub. Date: 2008-12-01
Image Number: 90998
Caption: Slowpoke. Things We'll Miss After the Election. Live-blogging of the infomercial. 8:11 Man upset about losing pension. 8:12 Barack places call to Michelle, the girls. 8:14 Soft fade to field of wheat. Increasingly specific identity-based candidate support. Antique thumbtack-collecting, puggle-owning, type B blood-having, sea-level dwellers for Palin. Musicians getting ticked at McCain for using their songs. BARRACUDA! MY HERO! McCain Palin Rally. Foo Fighters. I'll show you a barracuda! Heart World Tour. Bon Jovi. Political ads set in sun-dappled offices. Please note the symbolism of glorious morning sunlight pouring through the windows, in contrast to the 8-year sh*tstorm we've just been through.
     
5. Cartoonist Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2007-01-01 heart 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2007-01-01 Pub. Date: 2007-01-01
Image Number: 92347
Caption: Slowpoke. Are you PETRAEUSLY CORRECT? The Senate recently passed a resolution condemning an advertisement that dared to criticize General Petraeus. Confused about what you can and can't say about members of the military? I'm Professor Perkins, and I'm here to help! DO question the patriotism of a triple-amputee Vietnam vet, as the GOP did in attack ads against Sen. Max Cleland. Max Cleland claims he has the courage to lead ... But he's really Osama's best ho! DON'T dare point out that Gen. Petraeus has poppy seeds stuck in his teeth from his breakfast bagel. We're making progress in Anbar! DO mock John Kerry's wounds from Vietnam by passing out "Purple Heart Band-aids" at the Republican National Convention. Kerry got a widdle boo-boo! Snort! DON'T drop a newspaper featuring a photo of Petraeus on the floor. If you do, you must kiss it! I am SO sorry! DO dismiss the soldiers who wrote an op-ed in the New York Times that contradicted Petraeus' claims.* It was a liberal plot. Whatever you do, DON'T draw the general as Bush's leg-humping lapdog! Gen. Poodlus. Down, boy! This is a big no-no! Pfut. Congressional testimony. *Two of whom are now dead.
     
6. Cartoonist Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2007-01-01 heart 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2007-01-01 Pub. Date: 2007-01-01
Image Number: 92349
Caption: Slowpoke. Pop Culture Periscope. Today's topic: Skulls. Have you noticed that skulls are now everywhere? Used to be, they were reserved for the death-related … Fig. A. Toxic Waste. Fig. B. Metalhead. Hypocrisy. But now they've gone completely mainstream! Available at department stores. Sears Sale! Worn by pseudo-punk pop stars. Sweet-n-sassy heart and crossbones combo! Avril Lavigne. Be on the lookout for THIS: Baby's first death's head. Aw, we should send a print to grandma!
     
7. Cartoonist Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2006-01-01 heart 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2006-01-01 Pub. Date: 2006-01-01
Image Number: 86613
Caption: Slowpoke. Spreadin' the Manure. True: The White House has instructed the Dept. of Agriculture to work praise of Bush's foreign policy into speeches. Actual talking point. Agriculture is the heart and soul of a nation, and its importance should not be underestimated in the Iraqi's efforts to build a strong, self-sustaining democracy. Here are some other possible segueways ... When addressing sheep farmers: We all know there's nothing tastier than a rack of lamb. ... And speaking of Iraq, the President has a clear strategy for victory! Sheep produces of Okiedokie County. When addressing cattle ranchers: The fat veins in a well-marbled slice of beef remind me of rivers ... like the Euphrates and Tigris in Iraq - where, incidentally, the President has a clear strategy for victory! Caution: Try not to get too carried away. When I think of fruits and vegetables, I think of sprouting freedom in the Middle East ... Of land where spuds have replaced scuds ... Of dangling carrots of democracy ... Of the strong moral fiber of our President, who has a clear strategy for victory! Now, back to avocado prices ... Produce growers of Wahoochie County.
     
8. Cartoonist Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2006-01-01 heart 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2006-01-01 Pub. Date: 2006-01-01
Image Number: 86615
Caption: Slowpoke. After years of lobbying by the food industry, the House recently passed the National Uniformity For Food Act which negates states' food safety laws in favor of weaker federal regulation. (Crossed out) WARNINGL This food contains a chemical known to the State of California to cause cancer. What other new food safety laws lie ahead? Nutrition Label Reform - relaxes burdensome accuracy requirements. I can't believe these only contain one gram of fat. Tallow Twists. Rockin' Jalapeno Flavor. Heart Healthy. The Pretty Produce Act - Airbrushed fruit legalized. In the age of Photoshop, people demand perfection! Why not give it to them? Nature's Bosom Bananas. PSSSHT! Eventually, labeling is no longer an issue, as the food industry convinces people toxins are good for them. New Merculoids! Mountains of Mmm - mmm - Methylmercury in every bite! Mommy! I want Merculoids! I want Merculoids! Yes, dear.
     
9. Cartoonist Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2004-01-01 heart 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2004-01-01 Pub. Date: 2004-01-01
Image Number: 92663
Caption: Slowpoke. August 2001 - after receiving a warning about Al Qaeda's plans to attack the U.S., the President sprang into action with a series of preventive measures. Take THAT, Osama! Thwak! The Golf Ball Defense Shield. The President immediately set out to protect the Ridgewood Country Club in Waco, Texas by creating a zone of flying golf balls which could brain dangerous interlopers. Aggressive Brush-Clearing. By getting tough with the brush on his Crawford ranch, the President struck fear into the hearts of terrorists. Are you watching, evildoers? This COULD be your nappy beards! Rrrr. WHACK! Crackdown on Armadillos. The President deployed his Scottish terrier Barney to chase armadillos which, according to the White House, may have been Al Qaeda operatives. These armadillos hate freedom. Yap! And lastly, the ... Strategic Ass-Sitting Program. Yawn! I think it's time for operation Enduring Naptime.
     
10. Cartoonist Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2004-01-01 heart 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2004-01-01 Pub. Date: 2004-01-01
Image Number: 92667
Caption: Slowpoke. It's Spongy the encephalopathic politicow. With the aid of her press secretary, Spongy launches the first-ever bovine bid for President. MOOOOOO … Spongy says: "Pay no mind to my hideous, brainwasting disease. We must end all regulation of industry!" Downed Cows for a Better U.S. We (heart) Spongiform. Much of the electorate is unfazed by Spongy's non-human status. She might not be the brightest, but she surrounds herself with smart people! She seems like an honest everycow, and that's what matters. I like beef, so I like Spongy. Spongy shoots up dramatically in the polls with a surprise visit to troops in Iraq. Army. Hooray! Yay, Spongy! Coming soon: The debates! This country needs health care reform now! Moooo ... Mooo .. Moooo ... Spongy's opponent may be articulate, but he's too angry and impassioned. I'll take gentle mooing any day. I agree. Spongy wins, hands down!
     
11. Cartoonist Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2002-01-01 heart 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2002-01-01 Pub. Date: 2002-01-01
Image Number: 92650
Caption: Slowpoke. Drooly Julie's Culture Corner. Ah, yes! It's that time of year again when a young woman's fancy turns to male undergrads' tawny, muscled thighs covered with a light dusting of man-fur! (Sigh) It puts me in such a poetic mood! 'Sup, bro? Abercrumbie Lacrosse. O college boy, thine leg hair is like a meadow of wild grasses through which I would cavort nakedly, leaving heart-shaped crop circles. Huwh? Are you, like, an English major? Actually, I have my PH.D. in hanky-pankypology. Old Gravy XL Athletics. Aye, behold the sturdy young scholar, with legs like golden Corinthian pillars! Would that I could snip some of your calf fuzz and weave it with others' into a giant tapestry. 'Twould be my homage to man's glorious ursine pelt! Momma warned me about girls like this! Gapp Tennis. Hey, what about me? I'm a cyclist, so I shave my legs. Ah, the sinewy, glabrous legs of bikers! Spandex swaddled, spring-loaded pistons ready for action! You can ride the Tour de Drooly anytime! Move over Bukowski!
     
Result page:     (11 images)