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Rudy Park

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141. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-06-02 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-06-02 Pub. Date: 2015-06-02
Image Number: 127845
Caption: This is the Ask Sadie Show. You're on, caller. What's your problem? I'm - Don't pussyfoot around the issue. Get to the point! I don't have all day! Get on with it, already! Next caller. You're on. What's your problem? Um … nothing. I'm good.
     
142. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-05-31 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-05-31 Pub. Date: 2015-05-31
Image Number: 126893
Caption: Your usual ginseng pumpernickel ostrich-sweat latte? No thanks. I wanna try something different today. The pecan praline white chocolate mocha's also good. Ooh, that sounds good. I'll have one of those. Coming up. But can you substitute macadamia nut for the pecan? That'll take some work, but it's doable. Thank you. And can you substitute turkey tears for the praline? Turkey tears sound good. And can you substitute pureed bagel for the mocha? Pureed bagel sounds lovely. I see where this is going. And can you substitute ginseng for the macadamia nut, ostrich swear for the turkey tears, and pumpernickel for the bagel?
     
143. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-05-19 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-05-19 Pub. Date: 2015-05-19
Image Number: 127260
Caption: I've figured out why Vladimir Putin is so belligerent toward us. It's his last name. In the west, it's been the subject of jokes for decades. A thing like that would make anyone cranky and hostile, and eager to punish anyone who doesn't take them seriously. Good point. I remember in grade school, there was a kid named "Ima Stinkbottom." She became an IRS auditor. I rest my case.
     
144. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-05-13 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-05-13 Pub. Date: 2015-05-13
Image Number: 126889
Caption: Rudy, you're good with kids. Sit down, I need your advice. Sure thing, boss. Businessman of the Year. Armstrong Maynard. If a girl scout asked me if she could set up a cookie stand outside the café … What would be the most kid-friendly way to serve her with a cease and desist order? Are you serious? I was thinking of having the process server dress up as Big Bird.
     
145. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-04-11 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-04-11 Pub. Date: 2015-04-11
Image Number: 125279
Caption: Do you believe in global warming? No, because it snowed last winter. The whole thing's a hoax. Just like the so-called "moon landing". I can't do this. I'm telling you, respecting different opinion triples your dating pool. I'm not that good a swimmer. Maybe a big pool's a bad idea.
     
146. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-03-27 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-03-27 Pub. Date: 2015-03-27
Image Number: 124713
Caption: It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller. My son's expressing curiosity about … well … you know. I'm worried that maybe it's time to have the talk. How do I tell him about … you know … without making it seem like a good thing? I don't want him to go out and … you know. I just want him to know how the ... you know ... works with the ... you know ... without making him want to go out and ... you know. Maybe you should buy him a book and call it a day. I don't know ...
     
147. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-03-16 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-03-16 Pub. Date: 2015-03-16
Image Number: 124314
Caption: Good morning, Rudy. What's so good about it? My awareness that Google and Apple, the two companies you idolize, are in increasing cutthroat competition. To think of the damage your two darlings could do to one another. The chaos. The drama. The Anguish! Plus, it's sunny. Bite me.
     
148. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-03-05 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-03-05 Pub. Date: 2015-03-05
Image Number: 123747
Caption: Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, Brian Williams said he wrongly remembered being shot down over Iraq, and reporters who were there are saying Bill O'Reilly's really exaggerated his experiences during the Falklands War. What do you think of that? THEY'RE LIARS!!! But it's nothing new. Even Edward R. Murrow lied about being in World War II. I have it on good authority he filed all his "battlefield" reports from a love nest in the Swiss Alps, while I - I mean, while an unknown buxom beauty massaged his toes.
     
149. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-02-20 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-02-20 Pub. Date: 2015-02-20
Image Number: 123162
Caption: Boss, I'm more than just a cashier and a mopper-upper guy. What? If only you'll give me more of a decision-making role, you'll find that I've got a lot of good ideas. Such as? I, uh … didn't really expect you to ask me right now. I sense a cash register that needs mopping.
     
150. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-02-09 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-02-09 Pub. Date: 2015-02-09
Image Number: 122752
Caption: I was watching the Super Bowl, having a good time, when all of a sudden there was this insurance company commercial. It has some kid saying he'll never do this or never do that, because he died in an avoidable childhood accident. Can you believe that? They had the nerve to momentarily kill my super-bowl-buzz in order to potentially save kids' lives. That was awful. What were they thinking? I don't know. Some people just don't have their priorities straight.
     
151. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-02-05 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-02-05 Pub. Date: 2015-02-05
Image Number: 122489
Caption: Boss … I need to take a few months off for paternity leave. That's commendable. I'm all for fathers taking an active role in their children's lives. It's good for the health of our economy. Take all the time you need, as long as the "baby" you're talking about isn't a kitten, a houseplant or some video game where you raise a simulation of a baby. I'd like to withdraw my request. I thought you might, minion.
     
152. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-15 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-15 Pub. Date: 2015-01-15
Image Number: 121462
Caption: I asked a lady if she wanted to grab a kale smoothie with me. She totally ignored me. Of course she did. Very few ladies are interested in a guy who latches on to the latest fads. It suggests you've got a roving eye, and you'll leave her for someone new later on. Most women like a man who's "classic." Solid. Reliable. Unmoved by the ever-changing winds. That's why I eat nothing but nuts, berries and hippos. If it was good enough for the cavemen, it's good enough for me. I thought cavemen ate brontosauruses.
     
153. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-14 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-14 Pub. Date: 2015-01-14
Image Number: 121461
Caption: You're on "Ask Sadie." What's your problem?! The price of oil is plummeting. So why're all my stocks doing so badly? I own 500 shares of Big-Box-Store Inc., 300 of Useless-Crudco, and 400 of Mindless-Consumerism Conglomerated. With gas prices so low, people have a lot more money to blow on consumer goods, so the market should be booming! I don't get it! First of all, oil is falling because there's too much supply. And having too much gas is never a good thing. Wait ... this isn't "Money Talk"?
     
154. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-05 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-05 Pub. Date: 2015-01-05
Image Number: 121145
Caption: The cutest lady I've ever seen in my life just walked in. The Love Doctor's on a break. That's ok, I don't need advice. I think I'll just ask her out on my own. Good for you, little buddy! Yeah, I'm thinking of staring at her a little too long, and then mumbling my name to her ... and then nature will take its course. The Love Doctor will see you now.
     
155. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-12-30 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-12-30 Pub. Date: 2014-12-30
Image Number: 120913
Caption: To be an alpha male, little buddy, you've got to live like you've got nothing left to lose. I don't know, Randy. How could I just stop worrying about losing my dream job, or losing my life savings, or losing my looks ... or losing the respect of other men and the respect and adoration of the ladies? Good news and bad. Good: If you've never had any of that stuff, you can skip right to the "nothing left to lose" part. Ok ... and the bad?
     
156. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-12-21 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-12-21 Pub. Date: 2014-12-21
Image Number: 119729
Caption: Are you a "Star Wars" fan, good sir? Who isn't? I would like to propose a small wager. Ask me any question about Star Wars. Any question at all … and if I answer with 100% accuracy, I will win a free coffee and scone per day, for an entire year. Interesting. And what do I get if you answer wrong? You get this laptop computer. It's fully functional, except for a slight catastrophic logic board failure. Deal. Sucker. Here's the question: what was I wearing when I saw 'Empire Strikes Back' in the theater in 1980? Huh? What was I wearing, smart guy? Underpants. Ha! Nice try, but I always wore my Underoos OVER my pants!
     
157. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-12-16 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-12-16 Pub. Date: 2014-12-16
Image Number: 120325
Caption: It's the Dr. Sadie advice hour. For the next two hours, I'll be taking nothing but Christmas-related calls. House of Java.net Cybercafe. You're on, Vancouver. What's your problem?! I'm an atheist. How come there's no national holiday for that? There is! It's called "Christmas"! The ads and the marketers have sucked everything religious out of it. Nothing in the Bible says "thou shalt shop." Good point.
     
158. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-12-07 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-12-07 Pub. Date: 2014-12-07
Image Number: 119148
Caption: It's been a banner year for you, Rudy, and I'm glad I was part of it. What do you mean? In January, you almost quit to go find a better job. In February, Armstrong almost made you a partner in the café. In March, you almost started working out to get in shape for summer. In May, you almost finally started writing that novel you've always wanted to write. And through it all, I was there to taunt you and point out your shortcomings. I look forward to continuing our partnership in 2015! I almost thought of a really good comeback.
     
159. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-11-28 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-11-28 Pub. Date: 2014-11-28
Image Number: 119416
Caption: There comes a time, little buddy, when you have to just accept that you'll never be famous. … That your life will never be adapted for television, and that when you die, only five or six people will truly care. Randy, you’re a genius! That sounds like a really good premise for my reality show. You're not listening. "The World's Least Famous Man: Starring Rudy Park!"
     
160. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-11-11 good 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-11-11 Pub. Date: 2014-11-11
Image Number: 118876
Caption: It's important to women that a man has a good relationship with his mother. Why's that? Because how a man treats his mother is a good indicator of how he'll treat a girlfriend. That's why I created an app that calls your phone and displays a photo of you hugging your mom whenever a gorgeous lady is within three feet of you. It also displays a nice, sweet lady whenever you're within three feet of your mom.
     
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