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Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons

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1. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2018-01-21 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2018-01-21 Pub. Date: 2018-01-21
Image Number: 167798
Caption: Get Used to It. The New Normal from the former party of Lincoln. Moscow Federal. Bank of Cyprus. Happy Meal. US. Lie. A Dark and Stormy Night by me. Oil.
     
2. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-12-24 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-12-24 Pub. Date: 2017-12-24
Image Number: 166525
Caption: From a Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens. "Oh, Man!" looks here. Look, look, down here!" exclaimed the Ghost. They were a boy and a girl. Yellow, meagre, scowling, wolfish; but prostrate, too, in their humility. Where graceful youth should have filled their features out, and touched them with its freshest tints, a stale and shrivelled hand, like that of age, had pinched, and twisted them, and pulled them into shreds. Where angels might have sat enthroned, devils lurked, and glared out menacing. No change, no degradation, no perversion of humanity, in any grade, through all the mysteries of wonderful creation, has monsters half so horrible and dread. Scrooge started back, appalled. Having them shown to him in this way, he tried to say they were fine children, but the words choked themselves, rather than be parties to a lie of such enormous magnitude. "Spirit! Are they yours!" Scrooge could say now more. "They are Man's," said the Spirit, looking down upon them. "And they cling to me, appealing from their fathers. This boy is Ignorance. This girl is Want. Beware them both, and all of their degree, but most of all beware this boy, for on his brow I see that written which is Doom, unless the writing be erased. "Deny it!" cried the Spirit, stretching out its hand towards the city. "Slander those who tell it ye! Admit it for your factious purposes, and make it worse. And bide the end!" "Have they no refuge or resource!" cried Scrooge. "Are there no prisons!" said the Spirit, turning on him for the last time with his own words. "Are there no workhouses!"
     
3. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-11-17 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-11-17 Pub. Date: 2017-11-17
Image Number: 165312
Caption: Back from Asia. Wail 'til I tell you about my success in China …
     
4. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-10-28 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-10-28 Pub. Date: 2017-10-28
Image Number: 164592
Caption: $300 Million Contract Awarded to 2 Person Company from Interior Secretary Zinke's Hometown … hmmm … We love Puerto Rico! So … how long have you worked for the company? Well … let's see. What's today? Tuesday?
     
5. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-10-22 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-10-22 Pub. Date: 2017-10-22
Image Number: 164187
Caption: From Catch 22* "Dear Mrs., Mr., Miss, or Mr. and Mrs. _______: Words cannot express the deep personal grief I experienced when your husband, son, father, or brother was killed, wounded, or reported missing in action." Got those letter ready fro me to sign, Sarah? FOX. *From Chapter 31, Catch 22, with apologies to Joseph Heller.
     
6. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-10-20 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-10-20 Pub. Date: 2017-10-20
Image Number: 164134
Caption: So You Get All Your News from the Internet? That's right. So I know it's all true. See, they can't put anything on the internet unless it's true. Where did you hear that? On the internet … Make America Great Again.
     
7. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-10-08 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-10-08 Pub. Date: 2017-10-08
Image Number: 163670
Caption: Hello Puerto Rico. It's from the great white father in Washington. A token of his esteem …
     
8. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-08-24 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-08-24 Pub. Date: 2017-08-24
Image Number: 162077
Caption: History Doesn't Repeat Itself, But It Rhymes.* Historic marker. Underground Railroad. Slaves from the south used this route fleeing to Canada. Later … undocumented workers used this route fleeing to Canada. *Attributed to Mark Twain.
     
9. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-07-29 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-07-29 Pub. Date: 2017-07-29
Image Number: 161051
Caption: From Seemingly Nowhere, Mr. Scaramucci Shows Up. Nice place ya got here, Reince boy, be a shame if somethin' ever happened to it. Mr. Priebus. Rinse - good work. The Donald.
     
10. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-06-07 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-06-07 Pub. Date: 2017-06-07
Image Number: 159127
Caption: Job Offer. The White House? You want to offer him a job? … Eh … Zoom! I'm sorry, he seems to have stepped away from his desk …
     
11. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-06-06 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-06-06 Pub. Date: 2017-06-06
Image Number: 159083
Caption: London Staying Calm. Fine ales. Ye Olde Crown and Implant. Fully licentious. 'Course, the only reason I come to the pub is to get away from the bloody Mooslims.
     
12. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-05-28 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-05-28 Pub. Date: 2017-05-28
Image Number: 158593
Caption: No caption (President Donald Trump and the First Lady Melania Trump take milk baths in bathtubs placed far away from each other).
     
13. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-05-19 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-05-19 Pub. Date: 2017-05-19
Image Number: 158330
Caption: Mr. McConnell Says He Would Appreciate "less drama from the White House." Impeachme … Everything is hunky dory.
     
14. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-04-12 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-04-12 Pub. Date: 2017-04-12
Image Number: 156933
Caption: In Other News, Steve Bannon Removed from Air Force One. Security.
     
15. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-04-10 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-04-10 Pub. Date: 2017-04-10
Image Number: 156919
Caption: McConnell Tells Putin. Lissen, Putin, you been tryin' to screw up our Democracy. We won't stand for that. No, sir! We're Americans. We'll screw up our own Democracy! We don't need help from anybody.
     
16. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-04-08 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-04-08 Pub. Date: 2017-04-08
Image Number: 156903
Caption: Jared Kushner in Charge of Lots of Stuff. War. Hey, it's gonna be great working with you, Jarry … benefitting from your wealth of experience. And you went to Harvard. Well, well … Say, my old friend went to Harvard. Ever know him? Henry Kissinger? Mom. H.
     
17. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-04-06 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-04-06 Pub. Date: 2017-04-06
Image Number: 156700
Caption: President Trump Analyzes News from Fox. Hmmm … nice cans.
     
18. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-03-31 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-03-31 Pub. Date: 2017-03-31
Image Number: 156458
Caption: Ivanka On The Job. Look! My new office … Right down the hall from daddy's. I can get some ideas about how to get more votes from women! Daddy's Li'l Girl. Ivanka. I can't wait to try out some ideas on that nice Mr. Bannon! He's so smart! Let's see … something for women ... Ivantalot. I'm surrounded by idiots ... Oooh ... Free panty hose for all women ... Ivantabankalot. Idiot number one ... Well, well, hard at work I see ... Yup! And listen to this idea, Steve ... Ivantabank.
     
19. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-03-25 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-03-25 Pub. Date: 2017-03-25
Image Number: 156369
Caption: Form 1040. Department of the Treasury. Internal Revenue Service. U.S. Individual Income Tax Return. 2016. OMB No. 1545-0074. IRS Use only - Keep your greasy fingers off this space. For the year Jan. 1 - Dec. 31, 2016 (And thank God THAT's over!). 2016 ending. 20. See separate instructions. Your Name (Phonetic Spelling). Your Name Used on Dating Service (Attach Recent Photograph). Your Social Security Number. Your gang or mob name (Ex: Louise Pepperoniface, etc) Your Travel Name (Do Not Use Mohammed). Your Other Social Security Number. Address of Your House Before Foreclosure. Crappy apt. you moved to. Bass Ale! How about a cold one right now? (adv.) City, State or Exit from Jersey Turnpike (if you have foreign address, go there and wait for instructions.) Presidential Election Campaign. Checking Here Will Not Make a Damn Bit of Difference. You. Whatshername. Instructions: Drop Dead. Except for Canada, Canada still OK. Eh? Filing Status. Or Fling Status. (It is later than you think.) 1. Single (in the Republican sense of the word). 2. Married Filing Jointly (include all arguments). 3. Married Filing Separately (include sex of partner if you remember). 4. Head of Household (are you the person who sits with head in hands and wonders how you are going to feed all these mistakes, er dependents?) Enter names of dependents. Write small. 5. Qualifying widower. Enter golf handicap. Exemptions. See Publication EXX "Exemption to Exemptions to Exemptions". If more than four exemptions, or if some exemptions have four legs check here. 6a. Yourself. (That's right, you, stupid. If you are not yourself, who did you claim to be?). b. Spouse (or anyone who thinks they should be) (That's a funny word. "spouse") c. Dependents: 1 First name. Nom de plume or AKAs. Phonetic Social Security Number. Last known address? Does this dependent follow instructions? (See instructions). Boxes checked. No. of children who had live-in girlfriends/boyfriends. Had their divorced spouses living with you. You asked to leave but they had no place to go. Add numbers on lines above. (OK to use fingers). d. Total number of exemptions claimed (Round up to nearest 3/5's). Income. Attach forms here. Attach a couple of Andy J's while you're at it, to speed processing. Your ad here! Read by millions! Contact IRS Media. Helpful Hint. We are not going to give you any helpful hints. 7 Wages, salaries, tips, bottle deposits, bribes, free lunches, coins found in couch cushions. 8a Taxable interest. Attach Schedule B. If you don't understand, go to plan B. b. Tax-exempt interest. Much more interesting, isn't it? 9a Ordinary dividends. Nothing special, just Joe the Dividend. b Qualified dividends. Big Whoop. Trump's Rich Friends. 10. Taxable Refunds. Bank error in your favor. Pass GO, collect 200. 11. Alimony received (if that bum ever paid up). 12. Business Income or (loss). Use Schedule EZ come, EZ go. 13. Capital gain of (loss). Include your share of the national debt. 14. Other gains or (losses). Check box if you are just making stuff up. 15a. IRA distributions. b. Amount you had with Lehman. 16a. Pensions and annuities. b Amount with State of Illinois. 17. Rental real estate, royalties, partnerships (Use Schedule X to report missing partner). 18. Farm Income or (loss), Attach Schedule F (Do not include the funny farm). 19. Unemployment compensation (Amazing isn't it? You get taxed on this, too). 20a. Social Security benefits b. Taxable amount. 21. Other Income. (Bake sales, washing cars, baby-sitting, bingo games, don't hide anything). 22. This is your total income. Unless you are General Electric. If so write zero. Adjusted Gross Income. Remember you can file this form electronically, using your computer, and really mess things up. 23 Educator expenses (Spankings, noogies, butt-kicking). 24 Certain business expenses that you as a mere nobody have no business knowing about. Just keep moving. 25 Health savings account deduction. (May make you sick.) 26 Moving expenses. (See instructions). 27 Instruction tax. 28 Self-employment tax. 29 Self-enjoyment tax. 30 Penalty for early withdrawal (One-half of self-enjoyment tax). 31a Alimony paid. Rat out spouse's SSAN. 32 USSR tax (Useless Social Security Recipients). 33 Student loan interest (Do not include English majors). 34 Lack of interest in being a student. 35. Add up lines one to a million, divide by twice the total sum of your weight in Chinese running shoes. If greater than one-half of total something, go forth and multiply. 36. This is your adjusted gross income (Adjusted? We mean disgusted.) Now we can go to page two, tra-la. Last thought: Any money or thing of worth laying around? Better send it in. Just in case. Hey, you never know. Cat. No. 11320B. Form 1040 (2016).
     
20. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-03-10 from 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-03-10 Pub. Date: 2017-03-10
Image Number: 155616
Caption: Scenes from Ben Carson's History of Immigration. Wow! What great luck! Our families can grow up in freedom and opportunity! And free transportation!
     
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