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Rudy Park

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Result page:     (18 images)


1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-04-23 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-04-23 Pub. Date: 2017-04-23
Image Number: 156593
Caption: Is your tap water free? Of course, fine sir. So is everything in it: The pollutants and chemicals … the countless microorganisms that cause allergies and grotesque diseases … all of which cost far more money to treat than the cost of bottled water. (Sigh) Fine. One bottle water, please. That'll be $6.99. I'm not sure what's worse: Countless microorganisms of one big greedy macroorganism. I'm done filling all the bottles from the tap, boss.
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-07 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-07 Pub. Date: 2016-12-07
Image Number: 151821
Caption: What's the best way to distract people when they're mad at you? Simple, little buddy. I cock my head to the side, smile, and say "guilty as charged." Then I ask for their phone number. This tends to fill them with hopeful anticipation. And it's a well-known fact that you can't hold both hopeful anticipation and recrimination in your brain at the same time. When I said "You," I meant *me*, not *you*. Oh. In that case, you might want to try begging forgiveness.
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-08-12 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-08-12 Pub. Date: 2016-08-12
Image Number: 147087
Caption: Scientists discovered an immense hole in Siberia. Nobody knows what caused it. Some think global warming melted a huge, gas-filled hill made of ice so fast that is exploded. Let's let them go on thinking that, little buddy. House of Java.net Cybercafe. By the way, if you ever go out to the middle of nowhere to brew your own black market cologne, make sure you don't brew it on a hill made of ice. That does not constitute an admission of anything.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-06-24 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-06-24 Pub. Date: 2016-06-24
Image Number: 144913
Caption: Today's alpha-lesson is "Become a Vapor." Wherever you are, be it a broom closet or a baseball stadium, carry yourself as if your body fills the entire place. Greet people with you arms out wide. Have a wide stance. A booming laugh. A wide-open smile. Becoming a vapor is the best and most legal way to mark your territory.
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-05-09 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-05-09 Pub. Date: 2016-05-09
Image Number: 143039
Caption: I bet you've filled your head with so many tweets and Instagrams that you've crowded out all your actual memories of your own life. Nonsense. I remember way back, all the way to … well let's see … oh, I've got it … My earliest memory was opening an America Online cd, putting it in our old PC, and seeing that symbol. You do realize that was the 1990s don't you? You must have already been in your teens. You are a very sick generation! I get misty-eyed when I think back to "you've got mail!"
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-05-08 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-05-08 Pub. Date: 2016-05-08
Image Number: 142234
Caption: What can I get you? An explanation for that dumb reason why Batman and Superman stopped fighting at the end of Batman V Superman. Would you like that spoiler-filled or spoiler-free? Spoiler-filled would be lovely, please. Ok. Batman did not stop fighting Superman just because both of their moms were named "Martha." "Martha" was not just a person. In Batman's nightmares, "Martha" had come to represent all that was good about him. When Superman whispered "Martha," it did two things: It forced Batman to see Superman as a person who - even as he was about to die - was only concerned with the safety of his human mother. So maybe he's not the alien monster who needs to die that Batman had thought he was ... And secondly, it reminded Batman of the good that used to be in him. The goodness "Martha" personified. Batman was on the verge of becoming a bad guy. When he swore "Martha will not die tonight," he was not just promising to save Clark's mom. he was promising to save his own soul. That'll be $14.95. Can I also get a side of explaining why Captain America and Iron Man can't just agree to disagree?
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-04-18 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-04-18 Pub. Date: 2016-04-18
Image Number: 142130
Caption: You're on "Ask Sadie." What's your problem?! Super delegates. A candidate could win the most votes in the primaries but lose anyway of the superdelegates want someone else! Can you believe that? Oh stop yer sniveling. In my day, the parties chose candidates in smoke-filled backrooms without even pretending the people get a vote. At least this charade gets you out of the house. Gets the blood pumping. I guess.
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-02-28 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-02-28 Pub. Date: 2016-02-28
Image Number: 139003
Caption: I'm 40! Oh. Well happy birthday. A lot of people wouldn't be happy about turning 40. But I'm thrilled! I've been looking forward to my midlife crisis for a long time. I've got it all planned. First I'm going to buy a sports car. Then I'm going to leave my family for someone half my age who really GETS me. Then we're going to embark on a road trip filled with booze, shoplifting and debauchery. Anyway, what's your most dangerous drink? I want something that says "I'm letting the tiger in me out to play!" We've got some week-old coffee I haven't thrown out yet. That's pretty dangerous. Gimme a large and keep it coming.
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-01-20 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-01-20 Pub. Date: 2016-01-20
Image Number: 137964
Caption: I'm thinking of suing your cafι. I just got a $2,000 dental bill. YOU should be paying for it. I'm in here every day and I always order your sugary scones and your sugar-filled lattes. That's why I had twelve cavities! I'll settle out of court for a scone and a latte. No deal.
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-08-23 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-08-23 Pub. Date: 2015-08-23
Image Number: 130664
Caption: What's the first thing you remember? Why do you ask? Because it'll help the cosmologists. Come again? Cosmologists have discovered a lot about the universe. In 1990, they discovered cosmic microwaves are "black body radiation." What that means is, they discovered the microwave radiation that fills the universe conforms exactly to a pattern known as a "black body spectrum" that was predicted by models of the big bang. English!!! They proved the big bang happened. But one of the big questions cosmologists still can't answer is: "What came before the big bang?" Cosmologists everywhere would very much love to hear about your earliest memory. Get ready to experience the second big bang!!!
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-08-11 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-08-11 Pub. Date: 2015-08-11
Image Number: 131010
Caption: I think I'm going to vote for Donald Trump. What? Why? Because he's trending. The slow recovery, the healthcare system, ISIS, the rest of the world … It's all no match for a guy who's trending. If we're lucky, he'll fill the cabinet with Kardashians. I'd like to see Beyonce as secretary of oh-yeah.
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-08-02 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-08-02 Pub. Date: 2015-08-02
Image Number: 129606
Caption: I recently read "The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up". It's changed my life, minion. Pay attention. May involve me. The reason a lot of us never have a truly clean house is, we settle. Settlers. Pilgrims. Turkey. Our clothes, for instance. Our closets are full of stuff we're just ok with. What we should do is take everything out, lay it all on the bed, go through it ... and anything we have to think about keeping, we toss. Floss. The only things you should keep in your closet are the ones that immediately fill you with joy. Almond Joy. Joy Behar. The human mind is much like a closet. To be truly happy, we must eliminate any unnecessary thoughts that don't bring us joy. I meditate every morning to ensure all my thoughts are profitable. It's important to focus. My next car might be a yellow Ford Focus.
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-10-13 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-10-13 Pub. Date: 2014-10-13
Image Number: 117697
Caption: What ever happened with that old shack you bought in the woods? You were going to rehab and flip it. It's going well. So far I've downloaded and categorized every single episode of "Property Brothers" and "Income Property." I had a little setback, though. The hard drive where I thought I'd stored "Curb Appeal" is filled with "Star Trek" instead. You bought that shack seven years ago. Counselor Troi is distracting.
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-09-16 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-09-16 Pub. Date: 2014-09-16
Image Number: 116549
Caption: Sadie? What're you doing with a gun? You ninnies put up a sign saying "No Guns." That's going to attract criminals who prey on the unarmed, and it’s going to attract pro-gun fanatics who'll want to protest the new policy. The cafι will soon be filled with goons looking to harm, and goons who think only their gun can protect them from anarchy. Naturally, I need to protect myself from all of them. Boss, I'm taking a sick-year.
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-08-01 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-08-01 Pub. Date: 2014-08-01
Image Number: 114436
Caption: Scientists discovered an immense hole in Siberia. Nobody knows what caused it. Some think global warming melted a huge gas-filled hill made of ice so fast that it exploded. Let's let them go on thinking that, little buddy. House of Java .net Cybercafe. By the way, if you ever go out to the middle of nowhere to brew your own black market cologne, make sure you don't brew it on a hill made of ice. That does not constitute an admission of anything.
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-04-27 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-04-27 Pub. Date: 2014-04-27
Image Number: 109908
Caption: THIS JUST IN: Nothing new happened today. Opinion polls are unchanged … No missing people were found … no new ones went missing … there were no shootings … the weather is the same as yesterday … Russia hasn't begun any new invasions, no natural disasters have struck, nobody "stood their ground" in Florida ... ... No celebrities have done anything dumb ... ... There are no new rumors about the next iPhone ... ... In short, we have 24 hours to fill and nothing to talk about. What's that mean? Stay tuned for expert analysis.
     
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-04-20 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-04-20 Pub. Date: 2014-04-20
Image Number: 109635
Caption: Is your tap water free? If course, fine sir. So is everything in it: the pollutants an chemicals … … the countless microorganisms that cause allergies and grotesque diseases … … all of which cost far more money to treat than the cost of a bottled water. (Sigh) Fine. One bottled water, please. That'll be $6.99. I'm not sure what's worse: countless microorganisms or one big greedy macroorganism. I'm done filling all the bottles from the tap, boss.
     
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-04-05 fill 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-04-05 Pub. Date: 2014-04-05
Image Number: 109634
Caption: I've been watching British shows on Hulu. They're strange. Why? Well … the people in them, they … they look really kind of … homely. You only think that because our shows are filled with impossibly perfect-looking models who look the way Americans WANT to look, not the way we really look. ... By "we" I mean "you." I'M modelicious.
     
Result page:     (18 images)