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Candorville

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Result page:    2  Next  (28 images)


1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-07-17 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-07-17 Pub. Date: 2017-07-17
Image Number: 160501
Caption: Would you like the good news or the bad. Bad. Ok. That "Vancouver" chick you're so in love with is cheating on you. Omigod … What's the good news? Since you don't have health insurance, the hospital says the albatrossectomy cost you $15,000. $15,000?! That's the good news?! Did I forget to say "relatively"? Dios mio.
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-04-25 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-04-25 Pub. Date: 2017-04-25
Image Number: 157285
Caption: Susan called 911 on me, Clyde. She was trying to get them to come take me in for a heart attack she thought I was having. But they put her on hold. And after a while, she sort of fell asleep and I sort of snuck away. Whachoomean "sort of," Big L? Ain't no such thing as "sort of." Somethin' either be or be not, bruh. One ambulance ride and one day in the hospital would eat up my whole life savings. Dead people ain't got no life savings, bruh.
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-04-03 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-04-03 Pub. Date: 2017-04-03
Image Number: 156465
Caption: So what if you can't get a mortgage to buy a house? If you really want to move to Canada, why not just rent? Because I've live in the same tiny $600 rent-controlled apartment my whole adult life, I've saved every month for decades, and I haven't bought a new computer since 2003. I've done all this so that one day I could afford to buy a house and have something to leave my son. Spending fifty billion dollars a month on rent might make that a little hard to do. You're exaggerating ... a little.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-09-22 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-09-22 Pub. Date: 2016-09-22
Image Number: 148764
Caption: Sir, Concast Cable's interested in an ad campaign that'll soften up their image in advance of this mega-merger. When people think of their purchase of Slime-Warmer Cable, Concast wants them to think of a mom-and-pop store … and not a corporate behemoth that's going to slash thousands of jobs, create a monopoly and eventually jack up prices. This'll be tough. On the bright side, we get to charge them the "utter (censored)" fee. Yayle. CEO of the Year 2002.
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-08-02 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-08-02 Pub. Date: 2016-08-02
Image Number: 146689
Caption: What do you mean you "had no choice"? I checked my bank account this morning. Newspapers, coffee, lunch, bus fare, diapers, day care, movie tickets, clothes It all adds up. It's like every day I leave the building, $50 vanishes from my wallet. Locking yourself on the roof all day is not the answer. I'm cold, hungry and my son's kinda stinky.
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-05-21 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-05-21 Pub. Date: 2016-05-21
Image Number: 143337
Caption: I took Lionel to his second baseball game the other day. We hadn't been to a Candorville Chokers game in two years. Back then, two Choker dogs, cokes and fries cost me $38. Last night it cost me $48. Back then, all the players were like 10 years younger than I was. But now they are all like 15 years younger. Having a kid speeds up the aging process. Baseball still around?
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-04-11 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-04-11 Pub. Date: 2016-04-11
Image Number: 141796
Caption: Whachoo gone an' canceled cable for, bruh? It's too expensive and I didn't watch most of the channels. I can see all my favorite shows on Netflix and Hulu for a fraction of the cost. That's selfish. Think of the ramifications. Think of the cable workers who gonna lose they job if erebody cut cable. Wait ... how did you know I canceled cable? (A) I don't know what you implying, an' (2) I don't even know how to tap somebody line to secretly share they cable.
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-03-26 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-03-26 Pub. Date: 2015-03-26
Image Number: 124644
Caption: If you could go back in time ten years, but you couldn't come back, and you would not be ten years younger would you do it? Only if I were an idiot. But if you went into the past, you could invest wisely and get rich. Yeah, but I'd die ten years earlier. We may only be decades away from figuring out how to end aging, or how to upload our consciousness to immortal android bodies. If I die ten years early, I might miss out on that. You know that stuff would only be for rich people, right? I've got $8,000 in an IRA.
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-01-09 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-01-09 Pub. Date: 2015-01-09
Image Number: 121080
Caption: I'm pretty sure my appendix just ruptured. Don't you want to call an ambulance? No, I opted for the silver Obamacare plan. That means if I call an ambulance, I won't be charged thousands of dollars for it. If that happens, I won't be able to keep saying "Obamacare's done nothing for me" with a clear conscience. Now's not the time to think about politics. Spoken just like a - ouch - ... statist.
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-09-15 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-09-15 Pub. Date: 2014-09-15
Image Number: 116478
Caption: I'm kind of disappointed in Apple's new smart watch. It's a rectangle. That's so 1980s. Watches are pretty much the only jewelry a hairy-chested man can get away with wearing without looking like he's in the mafia. This watch just doesnt work as man jewelry. It's too old-fashioned. You know what I'm saying? You sayin' you wanna feel better about the fact you can't afford that watch.
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-05-03 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-05-03 Pub. Date: 2014-05-03
Image Number: 110714
Caption: I took Lionel to his first baseball game the other day. I hadn't been to a Candorville Chokers game since I was a kid. Back then, two Choker Dogs, Cokes and fries cost $8. Last night, it cost me $38. Back then, all the players were like ten years older than I was. But now, they are all like ten years younger. "National Pastime" my behind, it should be national "past my time." Baseball still around?
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-04-12 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-04-12 Pub. Date: 2014-04-12
Image Number: 109844
Caption: Hello, Concast Cable, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. I'm pretty sure your merger with Cartel Cable is going to end up raising prices, so this is a great time to cancel my cable altogether and get all my favorite shows online for a fraction of the cost. At the sound of the beep, take your sky-high bills and shove them up your BEEP.
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-07-17 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-07-17 Pub. Date: 2013-07-17
Image Number: 99242
Caption: It ain't easy eatin' healthy, big L. When you walk into Groceryville, whachoo see? Grape juice: $4.48. Ten feet over, whachoo see? Grape DRINK 65 cents. What do you care? You're always eating MY food. Dont change the subject. Katrina's Ghost. Thug 4 Life.
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-06-18 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-06-18 Pub. Date: 2013-06-18
Image Number: 98184
Caption: What do you mean you "had no choice"? I checked my bank account this morning. Newspapers, coffee, lunch, bus fare, diapers, day care, movie tickets, clothes … It all adds up. It's like every day I leave the building, $50 vanishes from my wallet. Locking yourself on the roof all day is not the answer. I'm cold, hungry and my son's kinda stinky.
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-04-11 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-04-11 Pub. Date: 2013-04-11
Image Number: 95575
Caption: Lemont talks to his cable provider. You're right, satellite would end up being just as expensive. Glad you realized that! Doesn't mean I'm coming back to you. I've been thinking ... Almost everything I watch is online. Maybe I'll just get a Roku box and stream on Netflix and Hulu for $20/month. It's really over, isn't it. You'll find another man who won't mind paying $120 for the Sewing Channel. (Originally published on 2011-09-01).
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-04-10 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-04-10 Pub. Date: 2013-04-10
Image Number: 95574
Caption: Lemont talks to Brian at Concast cable. Didn't we give you HBO free for six months? When you were down, didn't we come over promptly to service you? Go ahead, try satellite. You'll come crawling back here when their six-month special is over and they get just as expensive as us. ok. 'Bye. WAIT! What if ... What if we change? It's too late, Brian. (Originally published on 2011-08-31).
     
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-02-21 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-02-21 Pub. Date: 2013-02-21
Image Number: 93618
Caption: You've reached Concast Cable. You have a past due balance of $198 for the month of January. How would like to remedy this? By credit card? By PayPal? By cancelling your overpriced service and finding something better to do with my time that sit in front of my TV. What if I gave you $10 off for the next six months? Ok.
     
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-05-14 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-05-14 Pub. Date: 2012-05-14
Image Number: 80981
Caption: And then, on his way out the door, the father turned and said " I would think you'd offer a discount of at least 10% " So even broke people could honor him by buying the book." I dont think thith ith "Where da Wild Things Are."
     
19. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-01-22 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-01-22 Pub. Date: 2012-01-22
Image Number: 74977
Caption: I'm so sick of Hollywood values. They clearly have nothing but hatred for America. That's nonsense. Why do you think Hollywood makes billions of dollars from millions of Americans every year? OWS protester love of red velvet cake. Daily Nutjob. Obama wet bed as child, covered it up. All those "Hollywood" values are actually American values. Million of Americans engage in violence, promiscuity, and whatever else you see on your tv. On the other hand, millions of Americans practice all the kindness, selflessness and tolerance you also see on tv. Hollywood is just a mirror of society. I only meant they charge a lot for movies and cable. Oh. Never mind, then. You're right.
     
20. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-09-01 expensive 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-09-01 Pub. Date: 2011-09-01
Image Number: 65031
Caption: Lemont talks to his cable provider. You're right, satellite would end up being just as expensive. Glad you realized that! Doesn't mean I'm coming back to you. I've been thinking ... Almost everything I watch is online. Maybe I'll just get a Roku box and stream on Netflix and Hulu for $20/month. It's really over, isn't it. You'll find another man who won't mind paying $120 for the Sewing Channel.
     
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