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Result page:    2  3  Next  (41 images)


1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-10-15 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-10-15 Pub. Date: 2016-10-15
Image Number: 149614
Caption: It's been a year since that magical night we spent near the lighthouse, and in jail … but Vancouver and I have been texting and Skyping almost every day since. Now I’m going to see her again in just six hours. I bet there'll be actual electricity when we touch. It's good that you're tempering your expectations.
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-06-08 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-06-08 Pub. Date: 2016-06-08
Image Number: 144221
Caption: You know how I've been seeing a lady from Vancouver long-distance? Dr. Noodle. I'm finally going to see her again in person, in just two weeks!!! But now I'm terrified. The one time we were together in person, it was hot and steamy and magical. We tend to build things up in our memories, and reality can never live up to our memories. Try to temper expectations. Too late. She's already started calling me "Thor." Ph.D.
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-07-09 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-07-09 Pub. Date: 2015-07-09
Image Number: 129284
Caption: Pick another story, son. No! I want beaw! You threw the bear story out the window. It landed in a dumpster, and a mangy dog threw up on it. Do you really want your beloved father to climb into that mess, get bitten by that rabid dog, and possibly get hurt or sick, just to get that book? Yyyaaaaay! That was not an offer.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-07-03 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-07-03 Pub. Date: 2015-07-03
Image Number: 129040
Caption: I'm tired of dating guys who seem to get their expectations of women from naughty internet sites. It's making guys think women actually like all the stupid stuff they see them doing. ... if you know what I mean. How would I know what you mean, Susan? I haven't the slightest idea. Are you talking about stupid snowboarding stunts or something? You're protesting too much, Lemont. I've barely even heard of the internet.
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-05-20 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-05-20 Pub. Date: 2015-05-20
Image Number: 127173
Caption: I keep thinking about those people who died or got hurt when that train derailed. Dr. Noodle. It's 2015. I'm ok with not having flying cars, or jetpacks, or moving sidewalks. M.A. But we should at least have trains and tracks that can't toss us off to our deaths now. The older I get, the less I expect. That's perfectly normal, Lemont.
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-04-28 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-04-28 Pub. Date: 2015-04-28
Image Number: 126131
Caption: Lemme see that paper when you done widdit, Big L. Why? You don't read the news. You couldn't care less about the news. Unless … Unless you're expecting to read news that's about you. … What did you do, Clyde? I'm offended that you asked. Besides, I'm workin' on a alibi.
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-10-03 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-10-03 Pub. Date: 2014-10-03
Image Number: 117060
Caption: … Because when libs talk "equal opportunity," they really mean "give me stuff I didn't earn." If you can't afford something, don't expect government to give it to you. If you didn't work hard enough to afford it, you just can't have it. Freeloaders. No, I asked why you're in favor of vouchers for private schools. Oh. 'Cause poor kids deserve private school too. (This cartoon was originally published on 2012-06-02).
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-09-28 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-09-28 Pub. Date: 2014-09-28
Image Number: 116324
Caption: I'm through with looking for a woman to date. That's drastic. Dr. Noodle. Not really. I've realized I've always had a void, deep in my soul. PhD. I've always felt alone, unloved, unneeded … As if there were no one expecting me to be a great man. When I was a kid, I filled that void with comics. Then later, with a woman's love. But you've realized the void is just too deep for anyone to fill? There is no woman alive who can love me so completely ... that I'll finally feel like I'm an important part of the world and I have a purpose. You're thinking of seeking God's love? I'm thinking of dating two women.
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-05-24 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-05-24 Pub. Date: 2014-05-24
Image Number: 111559
Caption: It's been five months, three days and seventeen hours since anyone paid me a compliment! Well … that's probably the highest compliment there is, Susan. It means people have to come to expect you to be smart, driven, kind and gorgeous … so when you are all those things, nobody really notices. That's a pretty deep thought you had there. Thanks! ... Wait a minute. That's insulting.
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-04-13 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-04-13 Pub. Date: 2013-04-13
Image Number: 95577
Caption: Twitter. Twitter.com/CANDORVILLE. The cable guy's supposed to be at my place between one and five, so I'm expecting him at seven. (Originally published on 2011-09-03).
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-12-30 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-12-30 Pub. Date: 2012-12-30
Image Number: 91193
Caption: Mmblello? Your kid has already forgotten about the Christmas gift you're still paying off. Zzzxbox2! But that's not really why I'm calling. Whozit? You ate WAY too much over the holidays. You think months of wearing winter clothes will hide the excess lard till you lose weight. Juz bigbonzz. But climate change may make this winter warmer than you expect. Don't be surprised if you have to wear t-shirts in January. Zzfatzzz. Today's wake up call is sponsored by Dr. Biggums Liposuction.
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-12-08 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-12-08 Pub. Date: 2012-12-08
Image Number: 90582
Caption: The definition of "insanity" is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. No it's not … It's lack of mental capacity legally freeing one from civil or criminal responsibility. The definition of "insanity" is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. No it's not ...
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-10-16 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-10-16 Pub. Date: 2012-10-16
Image Number: 88632
Caption: Obama'd better not choke in tonight's debate. Thug 4 Life. When I was a kid, the Dodgers choked so much that I stopped caring about baseball altogether. Lots of young people expect Obama to at least put up a good fight. You see where I'm going with this? Don't really care. Thug 4 Life.
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-10-10 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-10-10 Pub. Date: 2012-10-10
Image Number: 88327
Caption: I just now got your text. I'm so sorry. Y'know … When someone sends a text message, they usually expect a response right away. I know you're busy, but how long does it take to glance down at your phone? I take it you don’t still need me to toss toilet paper in through your window. Let's change the subject.
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-09-30 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-09-30 Pub. Date: 2012-09-30
Image Number: 87550
Caption: I'm through with looking for a woman to date. That's drastic. Dr. Noodle. Not really. I've realized I've always had a void. Deep in my soul. PhD. I've always felt alone, unloved, unneeded … As if there were no one expecting me to be a great man. When I was a kid, I filled that void with comics. Then later, with a woman's love. But you've realized the void is just too deep for anyone to fill? There is no woman alive who can love me so completely ... ... That I'll finally feel like I'm an important part of the world and I have a purpose. You're thinking of seeking GOD'S love? I'm thinking of dating TWO women. PhD. v
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-09-27 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-09-27 Pub. Date: 2012-09-27
Image Number: 87793
Caption: Oh, I get it. You're not going to tell me what salary you'd expect … The Candorville Chronicle. … Because people almost always undervalue themselves. But if you think staying silent is going to trick me into admitting your top offer is $85k a year, you're ... Editor-In-Chief. There really needs to be a "rewind" button on this thing.
     
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-07-03 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-07-03 Pub. Date: 2012-07-03
Image Number: 83012
Caption: Everything was going fine with the guy from Date-A-Dude. Till he asked for my number. I thought he was gonna call to ask me out. But he TEXTED me. So what? It's 2012. What'd you expect him to do, wear tights and a feather and serenade you from the steps of your castle? I expected a phone call. Dream on, princess.
     
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-06-02 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-06-02 Pub. Date: 2012-06-02
Image Number: 81467
Caption: … Because when libs talk "equal opportunity," they really mean "give me stuff I didn't earn." If you can't afford something, don't expect government to give it to you. If you didn't work hard enough to afford it, you just can't have it. Freeloaders. No, I asked why you're in favor of vouchers for private schools. Oh. 'Cause poor kids deserve private school too.
     
19. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-03-23 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-03-23 Pub. Date: 2012-03-23
Image Number: 77682
Caption: I demand to appeal this to the other partners, Mr. Fitzhugh. You removing contraceptive coverage from my insurance is unacceptable. You earn six figures, Garcia. You can afford to buy your lady pills on your own. That's not the point. Health insurance is part of my compensation package. This is like you docking my pay. I expect to be paid in full for my hard work. Communist. CEO of the Year 2002.
     
20. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-09-24 expect 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-09-24 Pub. Date: 2011-09-24
Image Number: 65730
Caption: The definition of "insanity" is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. No it's not. It's lack of mental capacity legally freeing one from civil or criminal responsibility. The definition of "insanity" is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. No it's not.
     
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