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Pickles

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401. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2014-06-15 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2014-06-15 Pub. Date: 2014-06-15
Image Number: 111843
Caption: What's this? Oh, no you DON'T! Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on ME! What's the problem? The computer just warned me that I have too many open windows and I need to close some. Nice try, computer. Last time I checked the whole house, and not a single window was open!
     
402. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2014-06-01 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2014-06-01 Pub. Date: 2014-06-01
Image Number: 111289
Caption: Earl, how many days in a row have you been wearing those pants? I don’t know. Who's counting? Isn't it about time to put them in the laundry basket? The way I see it, shirts, socks and underwear need washing. Pants don't, unless you spill something on them. Stay there. I'll get the ketchup.
     
403. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2014-04-14 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2014-04-14 Pub. Date: 2014-04-14
Image Number: 109608
Caption: Don't bother grampa, Nelson. He's all tuckered out. How come he's so tired? My sister was here for lunch today and I told him to be nice. It takes him a couple of hours to recover from being nice for so long.
     
404. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2014-03-14 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2014-03-14 Pub. Date: 2014-03-14
Image Number: 108032
Caption: My daughter said she wanted to take a "selfie" with me. I had no idea what she meant. Then she grabbed me, held out her phone and blinded me with her flash. And then she left me there, dazed, confused and seeing spots. Is she mad at your for some reason? I don't know. Maybe.
     
405. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2014-01-30 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2014-01-30 Pub. Date: 2014-01-30
Image Number: 106556
Caption: As long as I look straight ahead my neck feels fine. But it hurts if I look up or down, or to the left or right. Well, I hope you feel better soon, dear. I've still got eyes in the back of my head, so don't you boys try getting away with anything!
     
406. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2013-12-29 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2013-12-29 Pub. Date: 2013-12-29
Image Number: 105245
Caption: Woof! Woof! Worf! Woof Wumf! What's all that barking about? Wooph! Wharf! Woof wof! Woaf woof whomf! It's the neighbor's dog. He goes crazy every time I come out in the backyard. Wuff. Woof! Woorf! Whurf! Wow! That's got to be pretty annoying. Doesn’t it drive you bonkers? Woorf! Wruff! Whooph! Wrarf! Nope. I've mastered the technique of blocking out whatever noise I don't want to hear. Woorf! Wof! Wulf womf! If you don't believe me, just ask Opal. Woo woof! Wiff! Woff! Whaff.
     
407. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2013-12-08 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2013-12-08 Pub. Date: 2013-12-08
Image Number: 104412
Caption: I used to think trees could move because they're alive. I thought trees made the wind by swaying back and forth like big fans. The more they waved, the windier it got. Plus, they made noise like the fan in our house. Then I found out I was wrong. Trees don't make the wind. Gramma says grampa makes wind. And he blames it on me!
     
408. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2013-12-01 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2013-12-01 Pub. Date: 2013-12-01
Image Number: 104124
Caption: Grampa, how come some men go bald when they get old and some don't? Well, son, it's all because of something called genetics. What're genetics? That means you inherit certain traits from your ancestors. In my case, I inherited a trait called male pattern baldness. Aw, too bad! Did you at least get to choose the pattern?
     
409. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2013-10-10 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2013-10-10 Pub. Date: 2013-10-10
Image Number: 102267
Caption: Grampa, who's the boss, you or gramma? Well, I am the man of the house … The patriarch. So I guess, technically, you could say I'm the boss. BUT DON'T TELL GRAMMA I SAID THAT!
     
410. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2013-08-29 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2013-08-29 Pub. Date: 2013-08-29
Image Number: 100597
Caption: Don’t you care what people think about you, Earl? Nope. When people see you out in public in sweatpants they think, "there goes someone with no class". And they automatically knock 20 points off what ever they think your IQ might be. And no offense, but you don't have 20 points to spare.
     
411. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2013-06-10 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2013-06-10 Pub. Date: 2013-06-10
Image Number: 97455
Caption: Those are weird-looking pants, grampa. They're called camouflage pants, Nelson. What's camouflage? It means they make you blend in to your environment so you're not noticeable. I don't think it's working.
     
412. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2013-05-24 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2013-05-24 Pub. Date: 2013-05-24
Image Number: 96638
Caption: Aren't you going to fix this sprinkler, grampa? I don't know. It seems like kind of a shame. Maybe this sprinkler has always dreamed of being a geyser. Who am I to stifle it's creativity and make it conform to what everyone thinks a sprinkler should do? Grampa really hates fixing sprinklers.
     
413. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2013-05-19 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2013-05-19 Pub. Date: 2013-05-19
Image Number: 96633
Caption: How are your sniffles, Earl? Any better? Snoof! Nope, worse. Much worse. I'm afraid I'm not long for this world. I've done some research, and I'm pretty sure I've either got terminal dropsy or galloping adult death syndrome. Earl, I've told you a hundred times ... If you feel sick, DON'T look up your symptoms on Google!!
     
414. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2013-04-29 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2013-04-29 Pub. Date: 2013-04-29
Image Number: 95807
Caption: Don't chew your fingernails, Earl, that's disgusting. You should do like I do and get a manicure. I don’t get manicures. I gnaw off broken nails. I'm married to a caveman. Cavemen don’t wear cheap cologne.
     
415. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2013-04-11 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2013-04-11 Pub. Date: 2013-04-11
Image Number: 95057
Caption: Are you asleep, Earl? Nope, I'm just contemplating. Contemplating what? Oh, you know. The big question. The big question? Yes. Don't you ever stop and ask yourself, why am I here? Yes, quite often I ask myself why you're here.
     
416. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2013-01-20 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2013-01-20 Pub. Date: 2013-01-20
Image Number: 92114
Caption: Young folks today are spoiled rotten. I hear them complain about having to get up early to go to school or work, and I think, poor babies! They'd sleep 'til noon if they had their way. Look at me. I'm old and retired, but I still get up at five every morning, seven days a week. And you don't hear me whining about it, do you? Nope. You just stumble in from the bathroom and crawl back in bed by 5:05. That's not the point!
     
417. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2012-12-30 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2012-12-30 Pub. Date: 2012-12-30
Image Number: 91199
Caption: What are you reading, Earl? "Huckleberry Finn." Haven't you already read that? Yeah, several times. But, as someone once said, "A truly great book should be read in youth, again in maturity and once more in old age … " " … As a fine building should be seen by morning light, at noon and by moonlight." That's very profound! Yeah, and besides, I don't remember a darn thing from the last time I read it.
     
418. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2012-12-21 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2012-12-21 Pub. Date: 2012-12-21
Image Number: 90617
Caption: What are you eating, Earl? Leftover pie for breakfast? Hey, don't judge me! Pie isn't that different from toast and jam. Judge you? I want to join you!
     
419. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2012-11-26 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2012-11-26 Pub. Date: 2012-11-26
Image Number: 89759
Caption: Grandpa, do you ever think about dyeing your hair? I DO dye my hair, Nelson. Its natural color is brown, so I dye it this beautiful shade of white. I also trim all the thick curls off the top of my head so it's easier to comb. Don't tell gramma. She thinks I come by these good looks naturally.
     
420. Cartoonist Brian Crane  Pickles 2012-11-21 don't 
Cartoonist(s): Brian Crane
Comic/Cartoon: Pickles
Viewable Date: 2012-11-21 Pub. Date: 2012-11-21
Image Number: 89465
Caption: So, you don't think I'm cool, huh? I don’t know. Actually, I'm pretty darn cool. In fact, I'm so cook I have to dress and act UNCOOL just so the ladies don’t chase me. It looks like it's working pretty good.
     
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