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Rudy Park

Comics and cartoons about things that are dead .

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Result page:    2  Next  (21 images)


1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-10-06 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-10-06 Pub. Date: 2017-10-06
Image Number: 163386
Caption: Do you remember your early childhood, Randy? Of course, little buddy. I come from a long line of Randies who have photographic memories. It's an evolutionary trait that enabled early Randies to survive despite being connoisseurs of the female form. "Evolution"? Doesn't that mean some of them didn't make it? Overly long stares lead to nothing but trouble.
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-10-05 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-10-05 Pub. Date: 2017-10-05
Image Number: 163385
Caption: Do you remember your early childhood, Randy? Of course, little buddy. I come from a long line of Randies who have photographic memories. It's an evolutionary trait that enabled early Randies to survive despite being connoisseurs of the female form. "Evolution"? Doesn't that mean some of them didn't make it? Overly long stares lead to nothing but trouble.
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-09-22 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-09-22 Pub. Date: 2017-09-22
Image Number: 162864
Caption: Seriously, boss? I'm no longer allowed to talk about astronomy at work? Why? It's just bad for business. What if I want to get a huge merger approved so I could finally achieve my lifelong dream of having a monopoly of my very own? The government's not exactly science-friendly these days. I don't want them throwing up roadblocks just because my minion aid something that pressed their buttons. Did you know Venus is a dead world because of global warming? Stop that.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-09-10 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-09-10 Pub. Date: 2017-09-10
Image Number: 161928
Caption: My uncle keeps sending me crazy, paranoid conspiracy theories he hears on Youtube. Dr. Noodle. It all started a few years ago when he sent me an email about how the victims of the Hindenburg crash were all crisis actors. These same victims died on the Titanic! He wrote. Then he told me President Obama was setting up Femur Camps, where he'd be letting the Illuminati harvest our femur bones for voodoo incantations to turn all our frogs into insomniacs. When I asked him why on earth would anyone want to do that? he said I had been brainwashed by the cabal that runs both the fake news and the pepperoni industries. So I replied why would they waste their time brainwashing me? What would they gain from that? Does your uncle have a hobby? Get him to refer uncle!!! $$$$$$$ ... because it's possible that you're his hobby. He said they've brainwashed me into thinking there's nothing to gain from brainwashing me.
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-18 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-18 Pub. Date: 2017-08-18
Image Number: 161547
Caption: You heard earth's just entered its sixth great extinction event? Really? Vertebrate species are dying at a rate not seen since the dinosaurs dies off. This time it's thanks to us. But the good thing is, scientists think humans will die off pretty early in this mass extinction. How's that a good thing? We won't be around to hear the other animals say "I told you so."
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-04-27 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-04-27 Pub. Date: 2017-04-27
Image Number: 157299
Caption: Democracy is dead in Turkey, Randy. What? What are you talking about? The president there just granted himself absolute power in a fraudulent election. You ever wonder if maybe democracy isn't the norm … it's just a blip in history and it's on the way out? I'm hoping it'll soon be replaced with a robust sexyocracy. I was hoping for more of an xboxocracy.
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-11 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-11 Pub. Date: 2016-12-11
Image Number: 151421
Caption: Oh, Liam. I thought you were dead. I thought I would never see you again! Is that why you married … my brother? … Oh, Caroline … it's doesn't matter. When the mafia held me captive in a seaside cave all these years, the only thing that kept me alive was the thought of you. Caroline ... who is that mysterious stranger lurking outside your bedroom window? Is it yet another lover? No, it's me. Frank. The executive producer. You can cut all this out, we've been canceled. The market can't support more than three soap operas anymore. Everyone's busy watching Youtube. But Frank, I've got three more kids to put through college! And another thirty payments on my car! What am I supposed to do, you heartless @#$%?! Wait ... who's that lurking over there outside that other window? I don't know. It's me. Jeff, CEO of the network. We've been sold to Sputum Cable. They're canceling all executive producer contracts.
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-11-23 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-11-23 Pub. Date: 2016-11-23
Image Number: 151308
Caption: Did you ever have a bff, Sadie? Several. But not a single one of those ninnies held up their end of the deal. What do you mean? Did they betray you? Did they come to their senses and unfriend you? No. They died. All my bffs have died on me. So watch yourself or I'll bff you next. The term's not usually used as a threat.
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-11-01 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-11-01 Pub. Date: 2016-11-01
Image Number: 150484
Caption: I still can't believe what happened with "The Walking Dead," Randy. That death … I don't think I'll ever get over it. Characters become real to us, little buddy. They become old friends. So when they "die," it's natural to mourn them just as we mourn anyone. No, I mean I can't believe I forgot to post a reaction video on Youtube of me crying when the death happened. But at least I got to post a reaction video of me reacting to my not having posted a reaction video. I've lived too long.
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-10-31 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-10-31 Pub. Date: 2016-10-31
Image Number: 150483
Caption: I’m not sure I'm going to keep watching "The Walking Dead." Because of who they just killed off? No, because of how they killed the character off. It would've been one thing if it were just scary … But it was gross, and traumatizing. My date just kept crying and wasn't in the mood for lovin' for 30 whole minutes after that. I haven't met a lady who was "in the mood" in years. They must've all been anticipating this episode. Sure.
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-10-05 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-10-05 Pub. Date: 2016-10-05
Image Number: 149320
Caption: You're on "Ask Sadie." What's your problem?! Elon Musk. I watched his announcement of his Mars colonial fleet project on Youtube. All it made me thing was, why aren't we already there? What've we been doing the last forty years?! Well, offhand … I'd say we haven't been spending billions to go to a dead rock in space that doesn't have even a single International House of Pancakes. Um ... o ... k ...
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-02-23 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-02-23 Pub. Date: 2016-02-23
Image Number: 139579
Caption: How many people do you think will mourn for you when you're dead, Randy? Good question, little buddy. I live out loud. I've ridden a motorcycle across five continents, making countless friends along the way. I've conducted passionate love affairs in six languages, and taught the ancient art of seduction to sold-out crowds in two hemispheres. As a youth I delivered pizza to lonely housewives, for whom I host an annual reunion in Vegas. A man who lives his life out loud will leave thousands of mourners when he dies. What about a man who lives his life on mute?
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-06-24 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-06-24 Pub. Date: 2015-06-24
Image Number: 128754
Caption: Boss, a car just lost control and crashed through the wall. It almost got me, but I'm ok. That's awful. Go like beneath it and play dead. The diver's liability insurance will pay out a lot more if my employee bites the dust. Plus, the life insurance policy I took out on you covers this exact contingency. I'm pretty sure they'll eventually find out I'm not dead. How would you feel about relocating to my cabin in the Alaskan wilderness?
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-06-12 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-06-12 Pub. Date: 2015-06-12
Image Number: 128140
Caption: Is this Randy the Love Doctor? Speaking. What ails you, brother? I'm in love with my brother's wife. What's the best way to ask her out? Posthumously. No, seriously. I can see myself spending the rest of my life with her. That just may end up being a beautiful five minutes.
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-03-14 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-03-14 Pub. Date: 2015-03-14
Image Number: 124104
Caption: I heard you're going to Mars to star on some reality show. Yep. Mars One. We launch ten years from now. Ten years? You don't have the attention span to wait ten minutes. In ten years, you'll have forgotten all about this. And when that day comes, I will mock and berate you mercilessly. You'll be dead in ten years. Ridiculing you gives me a reason to go on! Being around you gives me a reason to go to Mars.
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-08-23 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-08-23 Pub. Date: 2014-08-23
Image Number: 115313
Caption: I had a very rewarding week. Weird. What? You sound almost happy, satisfied. So strange for someone with such a meaningless, dead-end existence to find amid his personal rubble a nugget of joy. Defeat snatched from the jaws of a vague sense of contentedness. It's almost enough to give me hope.
     
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-07-08 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-07-08 Pub. Date: 2014-07-08
Image Number: 113514
Caption: Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, Why are you a Yankees fan? Purple pinstripes are WAY better than blue ones. Go Rockies! See ya in the series this year! -Love, prettyinpurple. *(Actual reader letter) Ask Sadie at rudy@rudypark.com. Why do I like the Yankees, Rudy? Dunno. Why do I like Cuban cigars, 100-year-old port, John Wayne, Albert Einstein rubbing my feet while I bathe in salt from THE DEAD SEA?! Um ... Why must I be subjected to letters like this?!?! I can't get past the Einstein thing ...
     
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-06-17 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-06-17 Pub. Date: 2014-06-17
Image Number: 112744
Caption: My cheapskate muse is dead. Great. I woke up yesterday and realized it's been months since I've had an idea for cheating the customers. Everything I'm coming up with is cliched: charging extra for toilet paper, 75 cents for a clean cup, one-for-the-price-of-two bagel specials. I can't take pride in ripping people off like that. One-for-the-price-of-two?
     
19. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-03-29 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-03-29 Pub. Date: 2014-03-29
Image Number: 109295
Caption: Funeral for a phone. Farewell friend, thanks for the talks. I'm glad our souls did meet. I prefer not to think that you have died. RIP CELLPHONE. But live on, just obsolete. Hey, that's worse!
     
20. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-02-17 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-02-17 Pub. Date: 2014-02-17
Image Number: 107781
Caption: Sadie, are you watching the Olympics? The Olympics are dead to me. The year was 1980. I had spent 50 years training for my moment in the sun. I'd sacrificed friends, family, wealth. I had become a tenth-level Scrabble Grand Master. To make it onto the team, I mercilessly destroyed every opponent that crossed my path, including one Rosalynn Carter. To this day, gullible people still believe we boycotted the Olympics because of some silly Soviet invasion. Randy, you watching the Olympics?
     
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