What can I get you today? I'll have a latte and … don't be rude, Jill. Pardon? I'm speaking to my little one. Jill, say hello to this nice man and introduce yourself properly. Hello. Properly. Hand him your card. Jill Johnson, CTO? Chief Toddler Officer. The apocalypse cannot be far off. I wanted Sans-Serif!
As our CEO-in-Chief has demonstrated, it's good for a businessman to surround himself with children who'll cover for â€¦ I mean, help him. I've tried adopting a baby, but the agency grew suspicious just because I asked for the type least likely to sell out its parent. Unfortunately, I can't just clone myself. I need an actual mate if I want to produce accomplices ... I mean "off-spring." Your job, minion, is to craft a date-a-dude.com profile for me that'll recruit ... I mean "attract" a suitable mate. Very bad man.