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Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons

Comics and cartoons about bribes and bribing.

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Result page:     (7 images)


1. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-04-15 bribe 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-04-15 Pub. Date: 2017-04-15
Image Number: 157174
Caption: Mr. Manafort and Mr. Bannon Share a Dream. We go into business together. Manafort Bannon, incorporated. Bribes, corruption, special services, show business …
     
2. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-03-25 bribe 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-03-25 Pub. Date: 2017-03-25
Image Number: 156369
Caption: Form 1040. Department of the Treasury. Internal Revenue Service. U.S. Individual Income Tax Return. 2016. OMB No. 1545-0074. IRS Use only - Keep your greasy fingers off this space. For the year Jan. 1 - Dec. 31, 2016 (And thank God THAT's over!). 2016 ending. 20. See separate instructions. Your Name (Phonetic Spelling). Your Name Used on Dating Service (Attach Recent Photograph). Your Social Security Number. Your gang or mob name (Ex: Louise Pepperoniface, etc) Your Travel Name (Do Not Use Mohammed). Your Other Social Security Number. Address of Your House Before Foreclosure. Crappy apt. you moved to. Bass Ale! How about a cold one right now? (adv.) City, State or Exit from Jersey Turnpike (if you have foreign address, go there and wait for instructions.) Presidential Election Campaign. Checking Here Will Not Make a Damn Bit of Difference. You. Whatshername. Instructions: Drop Dead. Except for Canada, Canada still OK. Eh? Filing Status. Or Fling Status. (It is later than you think.) 1. Single (in the Republican sense of the word). 2. Married Filing Jointly (include all arguments). 3. Married Filing Separately (include sex of partner if you remember). 4. Head of Household (are you the person who sits with head in hands and wonders how you are going to feed all these mistakes, er dependents?) Enter names of dependents. Write small. 5. Qualifying widower. Enter golf handicap. Exemptions. See Publication EXX "Exemption to Exemptions to Exemptions". If more than four exemptions, or if some exemptions have four legs check here. 6a. Yourself. (That's right, you, stupid. If you are not yourself, who did you claim to be?). b. Spouse (or anyone who thinks they should be) (That's a funny word. "spouse") c. Dependents: 1 First name. Nom de plume or AKAs. Phonetic Social Security Number. Last known address? Does this dependent follow instructions? (See instructions). Boxes checked. No. of children who had live-in girlfriends/boyfriends. Had their divorced spouses living with you. You asked to leave but they had no place to go. Add numbers on lines above. (OK to use fingers). d. Total number of exemptions claimed (Round up to nearest 3/5's). Income. Attach forms here. Attach a couple of Andy J's while you're at it, to speed processing. Your ad here! Read by millions! Contact IRS Media. Helpful Hint. We are not going to give you any helpful hints. 7 Wages, salaries, tips, bottle deposits, bribes, free lunches, coins found in couch cushions. 8a Taxable interest. Attach Schedule B. If you don't understand, go to plan B. b. Tax-exempt interest. Much more interesting, isn't it? 9a Ordinary dividends. Nothing special, just Joe the Dividend. b Qualified dividends. Big Whoop. Trump's Rich Friends. 10. Taxable Refunds. Bank error in your favor. Pass GO, collect 200. 11. Alimony received (if that bum ever paid up). 12. Business Income or (loss). Use Schedule EZ come, EZ go. 13. Capital gain of (loss). Include your share of the national debt. 14. Other gains or (losses). Check box if you are just making stuff up. 15a. IRA distributions. b. Amount you had with Lehman. 16a. Pensions and annuities. b Amount with State of Illinois. 17. Rental real estate, royalties, partnerships (Use Schedule X to report missing partner). 18. Farm Income or (loss), Attach Schedule F (Do not include the funny farm). 19. Unemployment compensation (Amazing isn't it? You get taxed on this, too). 20a. Social Security benefits b. Taxable amount. 21. Other Income. (Bake sales, washing cars, baby-sitting, bingo games, don't hide anything). 22. This is your total income. Unless you are General Electric. If so write zero. Adjusted Gross Income. Remember you can file this form electronically, using your computer, and really mess things up. 23 Educator expenses (Spankings, noogies, butt-kicking). 24 Certain business expenses that you as a mere nobody have no business knowing about. Just keep moving. 25 Health savings account deduction. (May make you sick.) 26 Moving expenses. (See instructions). 27 Instruction tax. 28 Self-employment tax. 29 Self-enjoyment tax. 30 Penalty for early withdrawal (One-half of self-enjoyment tax). 31a Alimony paid. Rat out spouse's SSAN. 32 USSR tax (Useless Social Security Recipients). 33 Student loan interest (Do not include English majors). 34 Lack of interest in being a student. 35. Add up lines one to a million, divide by twice the total sum of your weight in Chinese running shoes. If greater than one-half of total something, go forth and multiply. 36. This is your adjusted gross income (Adjusted? We mean disgusted.) Now we can go to page two, tra-la. Last thought: Any money or thing of worth laying around? Better send it in. Just in case. Hey, you never know. Cat. No. 11320B. Form 1040 (2016).
     
3. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2011-10-09 bribe 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2011-10-09 Pub. Date: 2011-10-09
Image Number: 66697
Caption: Thanks Heavens Mayor Bloomberg Knows Who's Ruining Bew York. Financial Disaster. AHA! This is your fault! Occupy Wall Street. Bribes. Graft. Theft. Fraud. Greed. Corruption.
     
4. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2010-12-03 bribe 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2010-12-03 Pub. Date: 2010-12-03
Image Number: 54961
Caption: Honest Abdul. Mister President, the U.S. cannot leave Afghanistan so soon. Of course, I know the U.S. has been robbed by many bad Afghans. It has been robbed my many people in our government. Even President Karzai and his brother have stolen money from the U.S. But the U.S. has never been robbed by me, Honest Abdul! That is why you cannot leave yet. Give me a chance. I mean ... Heh-heh! I mean give peace a chance. Be patient! And may I say welcome to Afghanistan!
     
5. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2010-11-16 bribe 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2010-11-16 Pub. Date: 2010-11-16
Image Number: 54298
Caption: New Tea Party Congressman Meets the Lobby. Tea? Hah, oh, yes here in Washington we serve only the finest vintage tea. Our friend is new in town. After dinner, take him over to meet your bible study group on "C" Street Tea, hee
     
6. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2010-10-26 bribe 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2010-10-26 Pub. Date: 2010-10-26
Image Number: 53635
Caption: Mr. Karzai Says, Well, Yes, They Have Been Accepting "Bags of Money". Bank of Afghanistan. Drive-up window. Karzai. US. Deposits. Iran
     
7. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2010-06-21 bribe 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2010-06-21 Pub. Date: 2010-06-21
Image Number: 50488
Caption: Wall Street at Bat. Well, yes, perhaps I did swing and miss the last time, but I was wondering how your wife and kids are doing? And what about the funding for the oil regulators' home? Allow me to donate a mere bagatelle $$. Did I say 'strike three'? Well, silly me ... I must have lost count again. And now that I re-imagine that pitch in my mind, I see it was way inside, or outside, or something ... Let's be fair. What do you think it was?
     
Result page:     (7 images)