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Rudy Park

Comics and cartoons about breaks and breaking.

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41. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-03-17 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-03-17 Pub. Date: 2016-03-17
Image Number: 140524
Caption: Boss, the weirdest thing happened this morning. Someone threw a brick through my window at 4:30 a.m. Shocking. Horrible. Calamitous. Thank goodness you weren't hurt. On the bright side, since you were woken up, you managed to come in to work on time for the first time in months. Very. Bad. Man. There's a silver lining in everything, minion.
     
42. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-03-06 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-03-06 Pub. Date: 2016-03-06
Image Number: 139362
Caption: Breaking news! The Brazilian Zika virus is spreading explosively! Experts say it could be a bigger global health threat that Ebola! Most people infected with the disease won't feel any symptoms at all and those who do will probably just think it's a minor cold, experts say. Of course, if you're pregnant or may get pregnant, the virus may give your child a tiny microcephalic head. Otherwise no biggee. Wait ... what? Experts say concern over this calamitous virus is overblown. This is really no big deal at all. MAKE UP YOUR MINDS!!! Experts say this mostly innocuous virus could ravage the entire globe.
     
43. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-12-03 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-12-03 Pub. Date: 2015-12-03
Image Number: 135995
Caption: We interrupt today's "The Price is Right" episode to bring you breaking news … uh … never mind, we're sorry. It can wait. Please forgive us. Breaking News!!!!! Nobody messes with my routine. It'll never happen again.
     
44. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-11-26 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-11-26 Pub. Date: 2015-11-26
Image Number: 135702
Caption: What's the best way to break up with someone without hurting their feelings, Uncle Mort? Turn every comment political. For instance, if she says "want to cuddle?" you say … "I guess so. It's better than turning up the thermostat and contributing to the burning of fossil fuels." In my experience, they'll be too busy leaving to have hurt feelings. Let me write this down ...
     
45. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-11-25 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-11-25 Pub. Date: 2015-11-25
Image Number: 135701
Caption: What's the best way to break up with someone without hurting their feelings? Why would you want to do that? The whole point of breaking up with someone is to punish them for their shenanigans, their shortcomings, and their carnal incompetence! Why deny yourself satisfaction?! Every time you bring a tear to the eye of a loser, an angel get her wings.
     
46. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-11-24 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-11-24 Pub. Date: 2015-11-24
Image Number: 135700
Caption: Boss, what's the best way to break up with someone without hurting her feelings? Hush money. What? Offer the dumpee a cashier's check for $5,000 on the condition she refrains from having hurt feelings. If she just can't do that, then you should be compassionate and offer her a $1,000 check as long as she agrees not to burden you with her hurt feelings. Very bad man. Compassion is an essential component of any severance package.
     
47. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-11-23 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-11-23 Pub. Date: 2015-11-23
Image Number: 135699
Caption: What's the best way to break up with someone without hurting her feelings? Can't be done. What about "I think we've grown apart"? She'll be hurt you let that happen. What about "I love you, but I'm not IN love with you anymore? She'll be hurt you didn't tell her when there was still time to fix that. Are you saying there's absolutely no way to do it? There is one way, little buddy ... but it requires a crooked doctor who'll diagnose you with amnesia. I know a guy.
     
48. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-08-15 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-08-15 Pub. Date: 2015-08-15
Image Number: 131014
Caption: This just in: A sheriff's deputy in Kentucky is being sued over a video posted on Youtube … of him handcuffing a crying third-grader's biceps behind his back in a position most of us may consider torture. The child hadn't committed any crime, but he had displayed symptoms of Attention Deficit Disorder and PTSD. Breaking news!!!!! Maybe the police ARE a tad out of control. Some say the child brought it on himself by having a disability.
     
49. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-07-19 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-07-19 Pub. Date: 2015-07-19
Image Number: 129104
Caption: Breaking news! The Hubble telescope has just detected a rogue planet the size of Venus, plummeting through the asteroid belt. Its gravity is pulling Ceres and several dozen mountain-sized asteroids along with it. NASA believes their combined gravity will be enough to pull Mars and the moon along with them as they scream past earth and plummet into the sun. There will only be one place on earth that won't be utterly devastated by gravimetric forces. Find out where that is later in this broadcast. But first stay tuned for sports, after these messages ... OH COME ON!!! Tired of outrageous cable bills? Switch to satellite (until they all get knocked out of orbit)!
     
50. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-07-11 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-07-11 Pub. Date: 2015-07-11
Image Number: 129354
Caption: We interrupt today's "The Price is Right" episode to bring you breaking news … Weeks ago, the Hubble telescope spotted a rogue planet the size of Venus plummeting through the solar system on a collision course with earth. It turns out it was actually just a prank involving two very bored ISS astronauts and a grapefruit. Breaking news!!!!! Maybe we should send them to Mars after all. One of them seems to have scrawled "around and around and around and around" all over his space suit, in crayon.
     
51. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-05-17 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-05-17 Pub. Date: 2015-05-17
Image Number: 126205
Caption: We're back, baby! Oh, no. Today's Special. Latte + 1hr. Web. $12.50. I'll have Jell-o. Make that two Jello-os. We're celebrating. The old lady and I are back together again. What? How dare you?! I'm only four months older than you. You're on thin ice, darling. Oh, I'm on thin ice, snookums? Am I the one who invited his freeloading sister to live with us without even a discussion? Am I the one who "accidentally" left the gate open so her husband's beloved dog could run away? ... Dear? You're the one who incessantly rubs all that in my face ... Darling pudding-pie. Make mine for here, but make his to go. No, make mine for here, but make hers to go. Sorry, I'm breaking up with both of you.
     
52. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-03-23 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-03-23 Pub. Date: 2015-03-23
Image Number: 124709
Caption: 47 Republican senators sent a letter to the government of Iran saying any agreement they reach with the president is worthless. Students in Oklahoma were caught cheerfully singing chants about lynching black people. Hillary Clinton used a private email address, and Kim Kardashian is blond now. I told you, constantly getting breaking news alerts on your phone would not end well. Jellyfish protein may help improve memory.
     
53. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-02-25 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-02-25 Pub. Date: 2015-02-25
Image Number: 123473
Caption: I need to figure out how to break it to my parents that I understand about death. What're you going to say? I'm going to sit them down and tell them that I understand our cat Magus died, and that's why her body stopped working. I'm going to explain that death is a natural part of life, and that they don't have to treat me like a baby. I get it. If they're still feeling upset, I'll offer to take them out so they can buy themselves a treat. If all else fails, ice cream.
     
54. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-25 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-25 Pub. Date: 2015-01-25
Image Number: 121151
Caption: What does the world need most this time of year, minion? Make no sudden movements. It needs to not feel guilty about all the broken New Year's resolutions. I'm not following you. I've created and artificial intelligence program that combs everything posted by or about you on social media ... and then decides your New Year's resolution for you. For instance, yours is to ask out Mbege Anyango from Cameroon. The A.I. was determined she's your soul mate. I've ... I mean the A.I. ... has taken the liberty of booking your flight and deducting all fares and fees from your checking. But I don't feel like going. The problem isn't making resolutions ... the problem is nobody keeps them. Your app doesn't solve that. It doesn't? Are you sure? What if I told you the A.I. also controls a used military drone I bought off eBay? Cameroon sounds lovely.
     
55. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-17 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-17 Pub. Date: 2015-01-17
Image Number: 121464
Caption: You ever wonder what the world would be like if Lincoln had lived? Stop! I'm tired of everyone trying to blame my great-grandmother for what happened! I mean, sure, she could've let J.W. Booth down easy, instead of mocking and taunting him until the shame made him snap. But blaming her for what happened hours later is just unfair! The history books are so incomplete. She always got blamed for everything. Like the time she set off a firecracker at Fort Sumter. How was she to know?
     
56. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2015-01-05 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2015-01-05 Pub. Date: 2015-01-05
Image Number: 121145
Caption: The cutest lady I've ever seen in my life just walked in. The Love Doctor's on a break. That's ok, I don't need advice. I think I'll just ask her out on my own. Good for you, little buddy! Yeah, I'm thinking of staring at her a little too long, and then mumbling my name to her ... and then nature will take its course. The Love Doctor will see you now.
     
57. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-12-08 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-12-08 Pub. Date: 2014-12-08
Image Number: 120010
Caption: Another fraternity's in the new for assaulting a woman at a party. That's why I quit PIG back in college. Pi-Iota-Gamma was the epitome of everything that wrong with fraternities. Guys would ply girls with drinks at every party, and I'd spend all night breaking down locked doors and stopping my own PIG brothers from doing anything evil. Real men don't need numbers, booze, pills or force to get anywhere with a woman. Women never even came to our parties at Lambda-Omicron-Sigma-Eta-Rho.
     
58. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-11-27 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-11-27 Pub. Date: 2014-11-27
Image Number: 119415
Caption: Have you ever broken up a marriage, Randy? Never. Married people are often bored out of their minds, and any hint of illicit adventure is enough to make them feel like they’re more alive then they've ever been. Only an amateur would take advantage of that sort of thing. It's too easy. I thought you were gonna say "it's wrong." That too.
     
59. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-11-26 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-11-26 Pub. Date: 2014-11-26
Image Number: 119414
Caption: What's the best way to break up a marriage? I'm not sure I want to know why you're asking. As long as Beyonce's sister stays married, I don’t have much chance of marrying her myself. I'm not fit enough for "Survivor," I don't have eight kids, and I'm a bit too old to be on "Big Brother." I figure marrying a celebrity's sister is my best chance to finally get my own reality show. Does "Willis" from "Diff'rent Strokes" have a sister? Ok, now I'm 100% sure.
     
60. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-10-20 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-10-20 Pub. Date: 2014-10-20
Image Number: 117982
Caption: Boss, FedEx just delivered a crate full of hazmat suits. Excellent. On your lunch break, drape a couple of them over the trash cans outside every café in town. If we're the only café in the township where people HAVEN'T found discarded hazmat suits, then everyone will assume we're the only Ebola-free cafe. I can't do all that in just three minutes. You can have twice as long for your lunch break today.
     
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