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Rudy Park

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21. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-13 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-13 Pub. Date: 2017-11-13
Image Number: 164882
Caption: What do you mean "give Rudy a minute"? He's doing something very delicate. Like what? He's trying to help Sadie find her old childhood friends online. He found lots of them. They're still alive! But the news is both good and bad, and he's not sure how to break it to her gently. They're ... um ... in a Facebook group called "Sadie-Survivors Support Group." What th -- I said tell me the bad news first, cretin.
     
22. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-10-21 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-10-21 Pub. Date: 2017-10-21
Image Number: 163920
Caption: We interrupt today's "The Price is Right" episode to bring you breaking news … Weeks ago, the Hubble telescope spotted a rogue planet the size of Venus plummeting through the solar system on a collision course with earth. It turns out it was actually just a prank involving two very bored ISS astronauts and a grapefruit. Breaking News!!!!! Maybe we should send them to Mars after all. One of them seems to have scrawled "Around and around and around and around" all over his space suit, in crayon.
     
23. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-10-19 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-10-19 Pub. Date: 2017-10-19
Image Number: 163918
Caption: Randy, I heard you're making a killing from your Youtube channel. How can a guy get in on that action? Simple … Just sit down in front of a camera and talk from the heart about something you're passionate about. Just be a genuine human being. People are drawn to that. I see, I see. Just one thing: What if the phrase "genuine human being" makes a guy break out in hives? Plan B: Find out what people are googling and pretend to be an expert on the highest-ranked search term. No we're talking.
     
24. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-10-15 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-10-15 Pub. Date: 2017-10-15
Image Number: 163200
Caption: You look tired, Rudy. Nah, I'm actually not tired. Why don't you go take a break. I'll man the counter for you. That's ok, Uncle Mort. Look at those bags beneath your eyes. And … are those wrinkles I see there? Did you know you age faster if you don't sleep? I'm on to you, Uncle Mort. You want me to step away so you can fix yourself an Espresso. Your doctors said no caffeine. You sound paranoid, Rudy. You're seeing duplicity everywhere. That's a symptom of sleep deprivation. I'm just thinking about your well-being. You're getting very very tired!!! Nice try, Uncle Mort.
     
25. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-10-02 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-10-02 Pub. Date: 2017-10-02
Image Number: 163382
Caption: Breaking news! But first, parents may wish to have their children leave the room. Children all gone? Ok, here's the breaking news … This just in: I have to advice parents to have their kids leave the room before I can report on what the president said. Breaking news!!!!! Someone's have a breakdown. That's not normal, people!!!
     
26. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-09-30 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-09-30 Pub. Date: 2017-09-30
Image Number: 163108
Caption: Randy, remember when the president went to the U.N. and talked about how unstable North Korea was? Yeah, that was right before he threatened to "totally destroy" North Korea. I see what you're getting at, little buddy. You think that was ironic. Yes. But what about Randy's axiom #67.1 ... "Unapologetic irony is the key to seduction. It breaks all rules of common sense and respect, and breaking rules is sexy." I didn't mean "sexy" in the hubba-hubba sense. Oh, good, because I was about to say, I didn't feel any hubbas at all.
     
27. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-16 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-16 Pub. Date: 2017-08-16
Image Number: 161545
Caption: Is this Randy the Love Doctor? Speaking. What ails you, brother? I met this woman. I fell madly in love with her, but just yesterday, I found out she believes the world is flat … Should I let that break us up? That depends, brother. Would you be happy not knowing whether she was into you because you're a great guy ... or because she thinks you're the mountain-master who pushes mountains up from the ground as she drives toward them, and sucks them back under as she drives away? Did I mention she's hot?
     
28. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-06-21 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-06-21 Pub. Date: 2017-06-21
Image Number: 159402
Caption: So … You're a journalist. That's right. Can I interview you? Eh … no thanks. But … I could get your story out. Don't you want the world to know why you're rebelling against Dictator Clause? Of course. That's why I tweet. I've got millions of followers who hear my side whenever I want them to. @#?* 21st century. RebelElf. Rebuffed loser journo. He got all mad. Time 4 cookie-break. #LameStreamMedia
     
29. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-04-21 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-04-21 Pub. Date: 2017-04-21
Image Number: 157028
Caption: "Ask Sadie Advice Hour," what's your problem?! I've been dating this man for 17 years. How do I get him to pop the big question? Which "big question" is that? "Hey, how come I'm not getting any lovin'?" … or "Hey, where are you going with all your luggage?" ... or "Hey, who's that guy and why are you riding him piggyback and kissing on his neck like that?" Get a clue, lady, he doesn't want you. Move on. Maybe I should give him more time.
     
30. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-03-18 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-03-18 Pub. Date: 2017-03-18
Image Number: 155669
Caption: Rudy, if you're playing a video game in there, I'm breaking this door down. Some of us have got to go. Of course I'm not. What's that beeping? I hear beeping in there. You're mistaken. What you probably heard is a big truck backing up a few blocks away. I've backed up. I've put on my motorcycle helmet. I'm getting a running start. But I'm almost at the next level! ... I mean I'm almost done.
     
31. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-05 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-05 Pub. Date: 2016-12-05
Image Number: 151819
Caption: Donald Trump's brilliant. Every time horrible news about him breaks, he distracts us will all the tweets. Like when he appointed a guy who wants to privatize Medicare. He distracted us all by tweeting that people who burn flags should lose their citizenship. That did seem to come out of nowhere. People barely ever burn flags these days. HOJ. Whenever he tweets, we'd be wise to check the back page of the newspaper. What's a "newspaper"?
     
32. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-10-27 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-10-27 Pub. Date: 2016-10-27
Image Number: 150209
Caption: I suppose you're wondering why I summoned you to the café at midnight, minion. Not really. They're keeping the voting machines in a warehouse on the outskirts of town. I'm not telling you to break in … and I'm not telling you to make it look like anti-Trump Communist illegal immigrants from China and Mexico rigged the machines on behalf of ISIS to elect Hillary Clinton. Does this have anything to do with all those "Trump was robbed" cupcakes you had me order? I'm not telling you that.
     
33. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-10-02 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-10-02 Pub. Date: 2016-10-02
Image Number: 148594
Caption: Open Mike Night Presents Sadie Cohen in: "The Difference Between Us". You're all half a century younger than me … which makes me so very aflutter with glee. YOU think a smartphone makes you a big champ … but I saw Muhammad Ali. You think reading tweets lets you know somebody ... but each letter I read was caressed and indented and scented and carried the essence of whoever sent it. I'm trying to wake you from a "life" that's too thin! ... or, barring that, break you. Either way, win-win. Can you repeat that? I was watching Youtube. What's a "letter"?
     
34. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-09-21 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-09-21 Pub. Date: 2016-09-21
Image Number: 148781
Caption: We've already had 35 people sign up for our new latte, scone and debt-consolidation loan combo. Where are you going to get all this money to loan people? Are you wearing a wire? Are you sure this is on the level? Smash your cellphone and I'll answer you.
     
35. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-09-19 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-09-19 Pub. Date: 2016-09-19
Image Number: 148779
Caption: Have you ever read Dickens, minion? No. Businessman of the Year. Armstrong Maynard. How about Upton Sinclair? John Steinbeck? Who? … Marx? Mark's what? Thank you for reminding me why I hired you, minion. Can I take my weekly lunch break today instead of Friday?
     
36. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-07-26 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-07-26 Pub. Date: 2016-07-26
Image Number: 146483
Caption: Where's my nephew? I haven't seen Rudy in days. He's in jail. He called me to bail him out, but I just can't. What?! What did he do? Did he steal something? Did he hurt someone? What did my nephew do?! And how could you leave him in jail?! Why didn't you bail him out?! He broke into the mayor's house and rooted around his underwear drawer looking for a rare "Pokémon Go" character. Say no more. Please.
     
37. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-04-23 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-04-23 Pub. Date: 2016-04-23
Image Number: 142135
Caption: We interrupt today's "The Price is Right" episode to bring you breaking news … An "Indiana Jones" producer says he can't imagine anyone other than Harrison Ford playing Indiana Jones in the upcoming sequels. This means Ford may be playing the intrepid archaeologist well into his eighties. Breaking news!!!!! He's way too young for me, but he could raid my Temple of Doom any day. We now return you to "The Price is Right."
     
38. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-04-14 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-04-14 Pub. Date: 2016-04-14
Image Number: 141817
Caption: Boss … I just got a memo saying you want me to work longer shifts. But I already work 18 hours a day. I need to sleep. Traitor. Spain is considering doing away with the siesta. No more mid-afternoon naps or three-hour lunch breaks. Spain is the most valuable ally we've ever had in the history of our country. We've got to stand by them by eliminating our own unnecessary frivolities. Very. Bad. Man. Also, Spain's minimum wage is about $5.87. We must stand with Spain.
     
39. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-03-17 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-03-17 Pub. Date: 2016-03-17
Image Number: 140524
Caption: Boss, the weirdest thing happened this morning. Someone threw a brick through my window at 4:30 a.m. Shocking. Horrible. Calamitous. Thank goodness you weren't hurt. On the bright side, since you were woken up, you managed to come in to work on time for the first time in months. Very. Bad. Man. There's a silver lining in everything, minion.
     
40. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-03-06 break 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-03-06 Pub. Date: 2016-03-06
Image Number: 139362
Caption: Breaking news! The Brazilian Zika virus is spreading explosively! Experts say it could be a bigger global health threat that Ebola! Most people infected with the disease won't feel any symptoms at all and those who do will probably just think it's a minor cold, experts say. Of course, if you're pregnant or may get pregnant, the virus may give your child a tiny microcephalic head. Otherwise no biggee. Wait ... what? Experts say concern over this calamitous virus is overblown. This is really no big deal at all. MAKE UP YOUR MINDS!!! Experts say this mostly innocuous virus could ravage the entire globe.
     
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