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Rudy Park

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Result page:    2  3  Next  (49 images)


1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-10-08 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-10-08 Pub. Date: 2017-10-08
Image Number: 162958
Caption: What was it you wanted to talk about, minion? Boss, you called me in at 2a.m. to clean out the gutters. We don't have any gutters. Of course we don't have any gutters. I'm confused. When I ordered you to clean out the gutters, it was clearly implied that you're first supposed to install them. Am I supposed to do all your thinking for you, Rudy? This is very disappointing. This will impact your next weekly performance review. Anyway, you'd better get to it. How do you expect the cafe's rooftop garden to properly drain without gutters? We don't have a rooftop garden. Very bad man. How do you expect to placate the green-freaks once we install the oil wells without a rooftop garden.
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-27 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-27 Pub. Date: 2017-08-27
Image Number: 161424
Caption: Excuse me, sir, if it's not too much trouble … Hi, Democrats. What can I get you? Coffee Sandwiches? An explanation. We introduced our bold new plan last month: "A Better Deal," but the progressives still aren't impressed. What more could they ask for? We focus-group tested the heck out of the slogan. It was the least objectionable and least un-inspiring of the bunch! It evokes FDR's "New Deal" and LBJ's "Fair Deal" without over-promising. We don't want to risk over-promising. It even sounded progressive! We mentioned tax credits to retrains workers, a $15 minimum wage (eventually), regulating prescription drug prices, and busting monopolies, maybe. We even said we'd think about forming a committee to consider considering sing-payer health care, among many other more corporate-donor-friendly options that aren't single-payer. And we introduced it with an editorial vowing not to expand government or move our party in one direction or another along the political spectrum. Bold! So why didn't that fire up the progressive base? ... Hello?
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-21 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-21 Pub. Date: 2017-08-21
Image Number: 161806
Caption: I'll have a triple-vanilla white mocha and a powdered donut. Also, a Tiki torch. A Tiki torch? Home Depot refused to sell me one for some reason. Then they said "get out." Why would they do that? I don't know. Probably because I was wearing my sheet. But I thought "better safe than sorry." Oh ... Wait, what? At the Charlottesville Klan rally, those guys didn't wear theirs, and plenty of them lost their jobs 'cause of that. Get out.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-07-16 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-07-16 Pub. Date: 2017-07-16
Image Number: 159829
Caption: Remember how you advised me to get a dangerous hobby to build up my self-esteem and impress people? Well, all the dangerous hobbies were already taken. You wrestle alligators … Armstrong skis down a pile of his money … Without a helmet. Even that ancient hag Sadie has a dangerous hobby. Every year, in violation of both common sense and local fire safety ordinances, the old lady lights all the candles on her birthday cake. I heard that!!! Fun fact: The 20th century was one of the most brutal in history. I witnessed most of it. And I took notes!! I've taken up "Sadie-taunting." You'd be better off with the alligators.
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-06-01 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-06-01 Pub. Date: 2017-06-01
Image Number: 158615
Caption: You've reached Randy, the Dating Doctor. What ails you? I'm friends with this girl … She's all I can think about. I treat her way better than the guys she dates, but she doesn't even know I'm alive. Of course she knows you're alive. You're the potted houseplant in the corner of her life. Do you understand what I'm telling you? That it's only a matter of time til it's my turn? You're more like a Venus Flytrap.
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-05-20 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-05-20 Pub. Date: 2017-05-20
Image Number: 158093
Caption: On today's Ask Sadie Radio Hour, we discuss one topic: The constant flirtation with fleeing to Canada. Canada has universal health insurance, far fewer killings, much less bigotry, more social mobility, better schools, less obesity, 50 weeks' maternity leave, blah blah blah. But that means nothing, because you know what they don't have? Panicky media telling you who to blame for the sky falling! We'll be back, after this message from Depends undergarments.
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-05-09 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-05-09 Pub. Date: 2017-05-09
Image Number: 157820
Caption: I've got a new theory, Randy, and it's going to shock the world. Why? Because it's pretty much irrefutable. You know how when you're in the bathroom, it feels like five minutes have passed … but to those waiting to use it, it feels like forever? Yes … And you know how when you're at the event horizon of a black hole, five minutes to you actually is forever to the rest of the universe? ... I think we'd better alert Neil Degrasse Tyson. I call it the Time Toilation Theory.
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-02-16 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-02-16 Pub. Date: 2017-02-16
Image Number: 154553
Caption: You know, replacing Rudy with a robot isn't going to go over well with us customers. Why not? Some customers come in just to see what he'll say next. Some come in 'cause he makes them feel better about themselves. And some of us come in because we actually like the little guy. Well you'll all be happy to hear I'm not replacing him. That was just a scurrilous rumor. Something's different about you. Exterminate!
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-30 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-30 Pub. Date: 2016-12-30
Image Number: 152646
Caption: I'm so sick of 2017, Randy. What? It's still 2016. I know. But everyone's saying how horrible 2016 is and how they can't wait for it to be over. I don't want to be part of the herd, I want to be a trendsetter. There are better ways to be a trendsetter, little buddy. #hashtag-2017-stinks.
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-25 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-25 Pub. Date: 2016-12-25
Image Number: 151673
Caption: Hello, you've reached the private line of the Secretary of Defense. At last! We tried calling you all day yesterday to alert you to an imminent threat. How did you get this number? It was coming straight at your nation-state at speeds approaching Kebin 2. What are you talking about? What's "Klebin 2"? Apologies. In earthlingese that would be "mach 23," or 24.140.16 kilometers per hour. Good lord! I'd better wake ... Not to worry. Our sensors locked on to it as soon as it launched from your North Pole. "North ... Pole?"? We incinerated it for you as it approached a chimney in your social-congregate region known as "Seattle." You ... wait ... you did what? You're welcome.
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-24 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-24 Pub. Date: 2016-12-24
Image Number: 152380
Caption: You're on "Ask Sadie." What's your problem?! Donald Trump. I voted for him, and now my family won't talk to me. They disinvited me from Christmas. I'm so sad. Forget them. If those losers can't suck it up and get over it, you're better off without them. I just meant I'm sad they beat me to it. I was going to tell them all to eat turkey with Hillary in Losertown.
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-11-30 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-11-30 Pub. Date: 2016-11-30
Image Number: 151570
Caption: I just bought a new Kindle Voyage. It's much better than my Kindle Paperwhite. Blasphemy, little buddy. A real man lugs around a paperback that he's milled from a fallen Redwood that he lifted off of a baby deer, before reuniting the fawn with its mother. I bought if off of Amazon. I didn't even use "one-click." I used the shopping cart and chose all the options manually. Almost as impressive. I keep it old-school.
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-10-20 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-10-20 Pub. Date: 2016-10-20
Image Number: 149919
Caption: I've decided. I know who I'm voting for, Randy. Do tell, little buddy. Well, I decided that in order to truly be better than the rest of you, I'd have to be completely above political parties or any one ideology. So I've decided to vote for George Washington. He's the only candidate who was never in a party and had no ideology. Even if that were true, isn't being against ideology an ideology? Don't try to propagandize me with your anti-anti-ideology ideology.
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-08-17 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-08-17 Pub. Date: 2016-08-17
Image Number: 147399
Caption: Rudy, I went out on a date last night. It was a miserable failure. Sorry. As my employee, you've seen me day in and day out. You know me better than anyone. Rudy, do I, your boss and sole source of income, have some personality flaw? Or did the fault lie entirely with my date? Feel free to speak candidly. Mother.
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-07-22 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-07-22 Pub. Date: 2016-07-22
Image Number: 146155
Caption: "Ask Sadie Advice Hour," What's your problem?! My song just started preschool. This sweet, innocent child who's seen nothing but "Sesame Street" came home after the first week and started hitting us and yelling "You're a bad guy! Good guys hit bad guys!" Yes, yes, it's an age-old problem: The corrupting influence of his peers. Might I suggest you wrap your angel in cellophane to protect him from his world? Better yet, launch him into space, where not even the cold virus can ever reach him! He did have the sniffles.
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-06-16 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-06-16 Pub. Date: 2016-06-16
Image Number: 144577
Caption: Boss, I've got a new idea. I think it'll double - no, triple - our sales. Not again. No, hear me out. This one's great. You know how we've been trying to figure out a way to keep customers from going to Coffee King? Yes. We've paid sweatshops in Foreignvania to post negative Yelp reviews ... We've planted rats in their kitchen ... and we've besmirched their name in many ways. Well here's my idea: why don't we try serving better coffee than them? Where's the fun in that?
     
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-06-07 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-06-07 Pub. Date: 2016-06-07
Image Number: 144238
Caption: Everything in life is a stepping stone to something better, little buddy. I know exactly what you mean, Randy. It's like when I first played Nintendo's Duck Hunt.
     
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-05-03 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-05-03 Pub. Date: 2016-05-03
Image Number: 142737
Caption: The new Avengers movie is going to be better than the new X-Men movie because it's not about saving the whole world. Yeah. People are tired of blockbusters where the fate of the whole world is at stake. That's why "The Martian" did so well. It was only about the fate of Matt Damon and his potato garden. I want to see a movie where aliens try to conquer Venus and nobody cares. We really should have our own movie review show.
     
19. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-04-17 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-04-17 Pub. Date: 2016-04-17
Image Number: 141249
Caption: What's your most popular drink? Why do you want to know? Why base your order on what other people are buying? Don't be a follower. Be your own man. If you're unfamiliar with a drink, ask what's in it and decide for yourself whether that sounds good. Or better yet, live a little. Take a risk. Choose a drink you've never had at random and see where it takes you. You only have one life. Don't live it following in the footsteps of other people. That's kind of harsh. No, it's the name of the drink.
     
20. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-03-27 better 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-03-27 Pub. Date: 2016-03-27
Image Number: 140308
Caption: To tweet, or not to tweet - that is the question. Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the snark and the venomous replies of anonymous jerks or to take arms against the sea of haters, and by Googling links that prove them wrong, end them. To stop updating, to pause - to pause - perchance to browse the tweets of others ... Ay, there's the rub, for in that browsing state what dreams may come when we have re'lized others are wittier than we. But that the dread of something after tweeting, the undiscovered country, from whose bourn no burned-out Twitter-pundit returns, puzzles the will, and does make anonymous haters of us all. Thus 'tis better to never stop tweeting, and never to read the tweets of others.
     
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