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Rudy Park

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Result page:    2  3  Next  (52 images)


1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-17 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-17 Pub. Date: 2018-04-17
Image Number: 170593
Caption: Can I ask you something man-to-man? Shoot. Let's say person A developed a crush on person B, who happens to be less productive. Let's say person A then conducted a study that concluded there's a 78.9% chance that such a crush leads to dating, then to cohabitation, and finally to person B becoming a a drain on person A's resources. Hypothetically, what's the best way to get person B to compensate person A for the time I ... he ... spent conducting the study? Very bad man.
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-01 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-01 Pub. Date: 2018-04-01
Image Number: 169596
Caption: Ask Sadie! I just read an article where Daisy Ridley said J.J. Abrams wrote drafts for Episode VIII and Episode IX. And then Rian Johnson THREW THAT OUT and went a whole different direction. This makes me lose all faith in Star Wars. Am I overreacting? **Actual reader question. Excellent question. This reminds me of the time I saw Gone with the Wind on opening day. I was the invited guest of an elderly veteran of the Civil War. He couldn't stop yammering about how seceding from the union didn't exactly go as planned. So I said to him I thought you were the Union! And I got up and walked out. Which was just as well, because in retrospect I'm sur ehe was trying to become my sugar daddy. And what was the question again? Ask Sadie. Almost answering questions since 1920-something. Send questions to asksadieshow@gmail.com.
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-03-22 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-03-22 Pub. Date: 2018-03-22
Image Number: 169641
Caption: I can't keep up, Randy. What happened, little buddy? You know how I created a hate-bot to automate my back you up in online arguments business? Don't tell me: The Russian troll farms beat you to it. No. My hate-bot became sentient and created an even snarkier hate-bot. Mankind is officially obsolete. For an extra $1, the HB-1000 will throw in racism and misogyny.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-02-18 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-02-18 Pub. Date: 2018-02-18
Image Number: 168052
Caption: When I was a youth, I dreamt of becoming a gangsta rapper who'd someday go legit and found a major record label and sell it for billions to Apple. Dr. Noodle. I never did it, though. I didn't know that career path was really possible. But then Dr. Dre cam along and he did it. That's an awfully specific dream you had. And then there was my Russian dream. I always dreamt of striking out in real estate, then catching the eye of Russian mobsters and foreign banks who'd bail me out if I agreed to launder tons of loot for them ... and then maybe I'd run for high office so I could repay the bank by giving so I could repay the bank by giving it a waiver exempting it from paying some huge fine, and maybe I'd be able to use my office to repay the mafia somehow too. Y'know ... sometimes when we're jealous, we rewrite history and actually believe I thought of that first. Oh, no, I've been laundering money for year -- wait this whole thing is confidential right?
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-02-15 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-02-15 Pub. Date: 2018-02-15
Image Number: 168444
Caption: We interrupt today's "The Price is Right" episode to bring you breaking news … Actor Richard Dreyfuss has been accused of groping the nethers of two female fans, and there are embarrassing photos to prove it. The breaking news is, we're going to stop reporting these things as breaking news, since they've become so common. Breaking news!!!!! It was just a matter of time. Breaking news: The following powerful men have not been accused of sexual assault today ...
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-02-08 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-02-08 Pub. Date: 2018-02-08
Image Number: 168189
Caption: I'm thinking of becoming a personal shopper. What's that? It's where you buy things for people who are too busy to go shopping themselves. I mean, I love to shop. I love it more than almost anything. They say if you love your work, you never work a day in your life. HOJ. To each his own, I guess. I love everything about shopping. From the seductive open sign, to the supple checkout lines.
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-18 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-18 Pub. Date: 2017-11-18
Image Number: 164887
Caption: Warner Brothers put several whole scenes from "Justice League" up on Youtube. Wrong move. Ruins the mystery. To market a movie like this, one must be a mystery. An enigma. A reserved figure who gives the impression of a beast with rippling muscles lurking just below the veneer of a gentleman. Wait ... isn't that last part from your self-help book "Randy's Guide to Becoming a Mysterious Man"? You'd be surprised at how universally applicable these principles are, little buddy. Anyway, I feel like I've already seen the whole movie. Bored now.
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-10-31 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-10-31 Pub. Date: 2017-10-31
Image Number: 164422
Caption: Nasa's going to give the moon a moon. What? It's going to capture an asteroid and put it in lunar orbit so we can practice docking with it and maybe mine it. Do you think it's too late for me to become and astronaut? I would love to be the first human being to say "can you hear me now" from an asteroid. Your deeds will be remember for centuries. I want to be the first human to moon the moon from the moon's moon.
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-10-28 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-10-28 Pub. Date: 2017-10-28
Image Number: 164164
Caption: It's the Ask Sadie Advice Hour. "Batfan" in Dallas, you're on. What's your problem?! House of Java Cybercafe. My girlfriend is refusing to go see "Justice League" because she things Marvel's take on the genre is the only way to do it. How do I get her to be more open-minded and tolerant? You don't! Just become less open-minded yourself. You can't change other people, you can only seek vengeance upon them. Um ... Do you happen to have Doctor Phil's number?
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-09-17 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-09-17 Pub. Date: 2017-09-17
Image Number: 162203
Caption: My Youtube channel's taking off. Mine too, little buddy. You have a Youtube channel? Of course, it's got 12.8 million subscribers. I accompanies my best-selling MANuals book series. I post a video per day. There's "Pickup Artist Mondays," "Man-Grooming Tuesdays," "Relationship Escape-Artist Wednesdays" ... "Become an Alpha in Five Minutes Thursdays" ... "New Advances in Speedos Fridays," and "Using Quantum Physics and the Multiverse Theory to Explain Why that Lady She Caught You with was Actually an Alternate Reality Version of Your Girlfriend So it's OK Saturdays." In other words, Saturdays are just fun stories about dumb guys who couldn't get away with dumb things. Viewership spikes to about 15 mil for those. Well ... anyway, like I was saying ... I'm just 87 subscribers away from hitting the 100-subscriber mark. Cool ... Hey, can I feature you on an upcoming "Stop Embarrassing Yourself Sunday"?
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-09-03 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-09-03 Pub. Date: 2017-09-03
Image Number: 161653
Caption: The mummified remains of about 40 Buddhist monks were discovered in China, Mongolia and India. All the mummies were found sitting in the lotus position. Many believe that these monks sat so still, meditated for so long, and slowed their heart rates and body functions so much that they became mummified alive ... and they believe that whether those mummies are 200, 600, or 1,000 years old ... they're still alive. Where'd you hear all that? "Strange Mysteries." It's a Youtube channel. I wrote to them to suggest they do a show on whether playing Xbox for five hours a night is the same things as meditating. I'd hate to accidentally mummify myself. You have been looking a little ashy lately.
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-02 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-02 Pub. Date: 2017-08-02
Image Number: 161038
Caption: I'd like to announce the debut of my new manual: "Randy's Guide for Raising an Alpha Child." I'd like to, but I can't. You see, in recent years we've replaced concrete and dirt playgrounds with bouncy rubber. And we've started arresting parents who let their kids explore the world by playing outside on their own. Somehow, it's become illegal to raise an alpha child.
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-06-24 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-06-24 Pub. Date: 2017-06-24
Image Number: 159405
Caption: What've you been up to since college, Lemont? Oh, I became a journalist … had a kid, blah blah … but I wanna hear about you, Rudy. Grigori Rasputin. How've you been all these years? How's your Uncle Mort? Are you a Russian spy? Boop boop boop. How'd that stomach-tumble-translator startup you founded in the nineties go? Wait ... what did you say you became? What do they have on President Trump? How's your cat? Boop.
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-06-06 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-06-06 Pub. Date: 2017-06-06
Image Number: 158832
Caption: To: Rudy Park. From: Lemont Brown. What're you up to these days, Brother Park? That depends. If we're talking the SimCity game I began back when we were in college in '93 … I'm up to 14 linked quad-core RAID devices that take up the whole basement. That's not what I meant. It's costing me a fortune, but I've been playing the same game for so long that I'm pretty sure my 59 billion Sims have become sentient and worship me as a deity. I meant how do you spend your time these days? Working. I've got 59 billion mouths to feed. Tap tap tap tap.
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-05-16 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-05-16 Pub. Date: 2017-05-16
Image Number: 158089
Caption: Have you ever felt like life was a puzzle? What do you mean, boss? Case in point: 1981. At the behest of my bleeding-heart kindergarten teacher, I became pen pals with one Kovarstvo Prestupnik of the Soviet Union. We immediately began a black market export-import business. I would ship him Twinkies dyed red, white and blue, and he's ship me Gummy Stalins. Fast-forward to 2017. Guess who Vladimir Putin just appointed as his Minister of Blackmailing White House Stooges?
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-03-06 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-03-06 Pub. Date: 2017-03-06
Image Number: 155391
Caption: I'm thinking of becoming a radical alt-right internet sensation. Ok, that's it. You can't just go along with every new trend there is. Some people are painters. Some are musicians. Some compose symphonies. My innate talent is sensing incoming trend waves and surfing their peaks and troughs as with the grace of a dolphin. Being a lemming is not a talent, little buddy. And I'm not sure dolphins "surf." Hold on ... trend wave incoming! It involves ... corduroy ... No, wait ... pancakes.
     
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-02-05 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-02-05 Pub. Date: 2017-02-05
Image Number: 153213
Caption: I've decided it's time for me to start dating again. Again? I've known you for twelve years, and I've never seen you date. I've been focused on work to the exclusion of all else. I have no hobbies, no friends, no interests at all that are unrelated to by business. Lately that's started to take a toll on me, Rudy. I've become sullen. Depressed. Lonely. Bitter. Morose. My customers have begun to notice, and I worry my bad mood will drive them away. So ... you want to focus less on business because being all business is bad for business. Also, true love is eventually tax deductible.
     
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-01-05 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-01-05 Pub. Date: 2017-01-05
Image Number: 152864
Caption: Well first of all, he can't find anything, ever. I have to find the man's socks, his toothbrush … Amanda Kern. Comics Counseling. And he'll tell me he's hungry in the morning. Then he'll go in the other room, and in the evening he comes back in and tells me he's starving. It's like as soon as we got married, the man became so stupid he can't even remember how to slap some peanut butter on a cracker. No, I said tell me his good points. Those are his good points. Foul!
     
19. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-29 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-29 Pub. Date: 2016-12-29
Image Number: 152645
Caption: Give me a double-tall white chocolate mocha, extra whip. Put it on my tab. Ok. Just leave your credit card with me and I'll charge you before you leave. What? That's not how it works. I'm supposed to just say "put it on my tab," and then I pay for it at some indeterminate point in the future. And then you're supposed to hint about my growing tab but never ask me to pay it because we've become such good pals. Real life isn't like tv.
     
20. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-11-11 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-11-11 Pub. Date: 2016-11-11
Image Number: 150764
Caption: Three years ago during a special episode of the Ask Sadieâ„¢ show, our resident octogenarian asked readers for advice about how she could deal with her midlife crisis. You should try a radical makeover. When I hit midlife, I dyed my hair, got some tattoos, and dropped 75 pounds. My husband barely recognized me when he returned from overseas. He was not happy with my "new self," so I divorced him rather than change who I'd become. It was the best decision I'd made since I cut my thieving mother out of my life. She and he were always a little too close anyway. - C. Post, Seattle WA. Maybe for my midlife crisis, I'll try oversharing! It seems to make you happy. Advise Sadie at asksadie@rudypark.com.
     
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