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Rudy Park

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Result page:    2  3  Next  (43 images)


1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-09-17 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-09-17 Pub. Date: 2017-09-17
Image Number: 162203
Caption: My Youtube channel's taking off. Mine too, little buddy. You have a Youtube channel? Of course, it's got 12.8 million subscribers. I accompanies my best-selling MANuals book series. I post a video per day. There's "Pickup Artist Mondays," "Man-Grooming Tuesdays," "Relationship Escape-Artist Wednesdays" ... "Become an Alpha in Five Minutes Thursdays" ... "New Advances in Speedos Fridays," and "Using Quantum Physics and the Multiverse Theory to Explain Why that Lady She Caught You with was Actually an Alternate Reality Version of Your Girlfriend So it's OK Saturdays." In other words, Saturdays are just fun stories about dumb guys who couldn't get away with dumb things. Viewership spikes to about 15 mil for those. Well ... anyway, like I was saying ... I'm just 87 subscribers away from hitting the 100-subscriber mark. Cool ... Hey, can I feature you on an upcoming "Stop Embarrassing Yourself Sunday"?
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-09-03 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-09-03 Pub. Date: 2017-09-03
Image Number: 161653
Caption: The mummified remains of about 40 Buddhist monks were discovered in China, Mongolia and India. All the mummies were found sitting in the lotus position. Many believe that these monks sat so still, meditated for so long, and slowed their heart rates and body functions so much that they became mummified alive ... and they believe that whether those mummies are 200, 600, or 1,000 years old ... they're still alive. Where'd you hear all that? "Strange Mysteries." It's a Youtube channel. I wrote to them to suggest they do a show on whether playing Xbox for five hours a night is the same things as meditating. I'd hate to accidentally mummify myself. You have been looking a little ashy lately.
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-02 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-02 Pub. Date: 2017-08-02
Image Number: 161038
Caption: I'd like to announce the debut of my new manual: "Randy's Guide for Raising an Alpha Child." I'd like to, but I can't. You see, in recent years we've replaced concrete and dirt playgrounds with bouncy rubber. And we've started arresting parents who let their kids explore the world by playing outside on their own. Somehow, it's become illegal to raise an alpha child.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-06-24 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-06-24 Pub. Date: 2017-06-24
Image Number: 159405
Caption: What've you been up to since college, Lemont? Oh, I became a journalist … had a kid, blah blah … but I wanna hear about you, Rudy. Grigori Rasputin. How've you been all these years? How's your Uncle Mort? Are you a Russian spy? Boop boop boop. How'd that stomach-tumble-translator startup you founded in the nineties go? Wait ... what did you say you became? What do they have on President Trump? How's your cat? Boop.
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-06-06 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-06-06 Pub. Date: 2017-06-06
Image Number: 158832
Caption: To: Rudy Park. From: Lemont Brown. What're you up to these days, Brother Park? That depends. If we're talking the SimCity game I began back when we were in college in '93 … I'm up to 14 linked quad-core RAID devices that take up the whole basement. That's not what I meant. It's costing me a fortune, but I've been playing the same game for so long that I'm pretty sure my 59 billion Sims have become sentient and worship me as a deity. I meant how do you spend your time these days? Working. I've got 59 billion mouths to feed. Tap tap tap tap.
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-05-16 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-05-16 Pub. Date: 2017-05-16
Image Number: 158089
Caption: Have you ever felt like life was a puzzle? What do you mean, boss? Case in point: 1981. At the behest of my bleeding-heart kindergarten teacher, I became pen pals with one Kovarstvo Prestupnik of the Soviet Union. We immediately began a black market export-import business. I would ship him Twinkies dyed red, white and blue, and he's ship me Gummy Stalins. Fast-forward to 2017. Guess who Vladimir Putin just appointed as his Minister of Blackmailing White House Stooges?
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-03-06 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-03-06 Pub. Date: 2017-03-06
Image Number: 155391
Caption: I'm thinking of becoming a radical alt-right internet sensation. Ok, that's it. You can't just go along with every new trend there is. Some people are painters. Some are musicians. Some compose symphonies. My innate talent is sensing incoming trend waves and surfing their peaks and troughs as with the grace of a dolphin. Being a lemming is not a talent, little buddy. And I'm not sure dolphins "surf." Hold on ... trend wave incoming! It involves ... corduroy ... No, wait ... pancakes.
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-02-05 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-02-05 Pub. Date: 2017-02-05
Image Number: 153213
Caption: I've decided it's time for me to start dating again. Again? I've known you for twelve years, and I've never seen you date. I've been focused on work to the exclusion of all else. I have no hobbies, no friends, no interests at all that are unrelated to by business. Lately that's started to take a toll on me, Rudy. I've become sullen. Depressed. Lonely. Bitter. Morose. My customers have begun to notice, and I worry my bad mood will drive them away. So ... you want to focus less on business because being all business is bad for business. Also, true love is eventually tax deductible.
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-01-05 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-01-05 Pub. Date: 2017-01-05
Image Number: 152864
Caption: Well first of all, he can't find anything, ever. I have to find the man's socks, his toothbrush … Amanda Kern. Comics Counseling. And he'll tell me he's hungry in the morning. Then he'll go in the other room, and in the evening he comes back in and tells me he's starving. It's like as soon as we got married, the man became so stupid he can't even remember how to slap some peanut butter on a cracker. No, I said tell me his good points. Those are his good points. Foul!
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-29 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-29 Pub. Date: 2016-12-29
Image Number: 152645
Caption: Give me a double-tall white chocolate mocha, extra whip. Put it on my tab. Ok. Just leave your credit card with me and I'll charge you before you leave. What? That's not how it works. I'm supposed to just say "put it on my tab," and then I pay for it at some indeterminate point in the future. And then you're supposed to hint about my growing tab but never ask me to pay it because we've become such good pals. Real life isn't like tv.
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-11-11 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-11-11 Pub. Date: 2016-11-11
Image Number: 150764
Caption: Three years ago during a special episode of the Ask Sadie™ show, our resident octogenarian asked readers for advice about how she could deal with her midlife crisis. You should try a radical makeover. When I hit midlife, I dyed my hair, got some tattoos, and dropped 75 pounds. My husband barely recognized me when he returned from overseas. He was not happy with my "new self," so I divorced him rather than change who I'd become. It was the best decision I'd made since I cut my thieving mother out of my life. She and he were always a little too close anyway. - C. Post, Seattle WA. Maybe for my midlife crisis, I'll try oversharing! It seems to make you happy. Advise Sadie at asksadie@rudypark.com.
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-11-07 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-11-07 Pub. Date: 2016-11-07
Image Number: 150760
Caption: Analysts have said the US and Russia are closer to nuclear war than ever. The outcome of the election tomorrow will probably determine whether we live in mediocrity … or whether we suffer a nuclear apocalypse in which a crafty café owner, who's squirreled away scones and ammunition in a vast network of underground bunkers, could rise to become feudal warlord of a brand new world. So ... who are you voting for again? The person I've been preparing ever since 2nd grade to vote for.
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-11-01 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-11-01 Pub. Date: 2016-11-01
Image Number: 150484
Caption: I still can't believe what happened with "The Walking Dead," Randy. That death … I don't think I'll ever get over it. Characters become real to us, little buddy. They become old friends. So when they "die," it's natural to mourn them just as we mourn anyone. No, I mean I can't believe I forgot to post a reaction video on Youtube of me crying when the death happened. But at least I got to post a reaction video of me reacting to my not having posted a reaction video. I've lived too long.
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-10-08 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-10-08 Pub. Date: 2016-10-08
Image Number: 149323
Caption: Think I'll be a more effective alpha male if I learn to play pool? That's one of those things you always see an alpha male do: Stand around a pool hall polishing his stick and racking up the balls … sizing up his shot, like he's secretly a geometric wizard who's about to make the whole world line up the way he wants it to with just one whack. Or maybe I should take up darts, where I myself become an extension of the missile I'm launching. Any sport in the bar family works.
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-07-31 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-07-31 Pub. Date: 2016-07-31
Image Number: 145649
Caption: Rudy, how's that print order coming? What print order? The "House of Java" flags I asked you to have printed. You were serious? Of course. Britain exiting the European Union was just the first domino to fall. Spain might be next , then Finland, then Foreignvania and all the other Anias. And that's just for starters. It's going to spread. My sources tell me the Maldives will be next to split up. Each coral atoll will become a separate and distinct Maldo. "Maldo"? From there the contagion will spread to Australia, which will become a collection of separate city states, some run by man, some run by marsupials. My calculations show it'll eventually spread to North America, where we'll disintegrate into thousands of tiny fiefdoms ruled by whoever is first to plant a flag. Are you sure you didn't forget to carry the "one"?
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-06-25 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-06-25 Pub. Date: 2016-06-25
Image Number: 144914
Caption: You're on "Ask Sadie." What's your problem?! I met a lady a while back. We're both stuck in marriages we don't want to be in. We'd rather be together but we don't have the courage to end things. What do you mean "courage"? Ending things isn't "courageous," it's cowardly. Courage means not running from misery, but embracing it, becoming its master, and delivering it upon all those around you with vengeance.
     
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-06-24 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-06-24 Pub. Date: 2016-06-24
Image Number: 144913
Caption: Today's alpha-lesson is "Become a Vapor." Wherever you are, be it a broom closet or a baseball stadium, carry yourself as if your body fills the entire place. Greet people with you arms out wide. Have a wide stance. A booming laugh. A wide-open smile. Becoming a vapor is the best and most legal way to mark your territory.
     
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-06-13 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-06-13 Pub. Date: 2016-06-13
Image Number: 144574
Caption: Have you ever thought of being a nun, Sadie? Of course. Years ago I dreamt of converting and becoming a cloistered nun. I thought it would be the one vocation that would take advantage of all my talents. But that was before I discovered that nuns being abusive, vindictive soul-crushing harpies was just a stereotype. Besides, the vow of chastity would've put a serious hitch in my get-along. Conversation over now.
     
19. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-05-08 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-05-08 Pub. Date: 2016-05-08
Image Number: 142234
Caption: What can I get you? An explanation for that dumb reason why Batman and Superman stopped fighting at the end of Batman V Superman. Would you like that spoiler-filled or spoiler-free? Spoiler-filled would be lovely, please. Ok. Batman did not stop fighting Superman just because both of their moms were named "Martha." "Martha" was not just a person. In Batman's nightmares, "Martha" had come to represent all that was good about him. When Superman whispered "Martha," it did two things: It forced Batman to see Superman as a person who - even as he was about to die - was only concerned with the safety of his human mother. So maybe he's not the alien monster who needs to die that Batman had thought he was ... And secondly, it reminded Batman of the good that used to be in him. The goodness "Martha" personified. Batman was on the verge of becoming a bad guy. When he swore "Martha will not die tonight," he was not just promising to save Clark's mom. he was promising to save his own soul. That'll be $14.95. Can I also get a side of explaining why Captain America and Iron Man can't just agree to disagree?
     
20. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-03-21 become 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-03-21 Pub. Date: 2016-03-21
Image Number: 140826
Caption: You're like the grandpa I never had, Mort. You never knew your grandpappy, Randy? Oh, no, I knew him. Grandpa Randy was an intrepid archaeologist who broke hearts and defeated villains all over the world. "Indiana Randy's" life story became the stuff of legend. They even made some movies based on his exploits. I'm just saying you're nothing like him. I was going to see those films back in the '80s, but the matinees were past my bedtime.
     
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