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Candorville

Comics and cartoons about bears.

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Result page:    2  Next  (37 images)


1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-10-23 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-10-23 Pub. Date: 2017-10-23
Image Number: 164147
Caption: I read your blog post about that dad who didn't make his kid apologize for bullying your kid. I never understood the point of makin' a kid say words he don't mean. How that gonna help the situation? What you need to do is hire a bigger kid to pull that bully's drawers up over his head. Revenge is never the answer, Clyde. If he wake up an' find his teddy bear's head on the pillow next to him, he'd get the message.
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-05-15 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-05-15 Pub. Date: 2017-05-15
Image Number: 158076
Caption: This just in: A week's worth of oil has been found deep beneath Canardville, a suburb of Candorville. Oil companie … click. Photo of the Trump sons, Uday and Qusay, hunting an endangered bearicorn. The elusive half-bear, half-unicorn hybrid was once thought to be a myth, but ... Click. Putin appoints the notorious oligarch Kovarstvo Prestupnik to head up the newly created "Ministry of Blackmailing White House Stooges." Click. Gilligaaaaan, the Skipper tooooo ... the millionaaaaire ... and his wiiiiiiiiife ...
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-05-11 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-05-11 Pub. Date: 2017-05-11
Image Number: 157810
Caption: How was I supposed to know it was innocent? You asked me to "hold something" for you. Never in the history of man has that turned out well for the person who's said "ok." Yeah, well Big Oatmeal an' the rest of the boys found it in my closet. All I could think of to save my rep was to say "I sell them things for $5 at the playground." I'm still not helping you break into "Big Oatmeal's" house to steal back you old Teddy Ruxpin. You ain't no real friend.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-10-04 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-10-04 Pub. Date: 2016-10-04
Image Number: 149307
Caption: 1982. Do you ever get claustrophobic, Lemont? What's "claustrophobic"? I think it's the fear of tight spaces. It's why mama won't fly, or ride the bus, or ride in a car. She walks everywhere. That makes no sense. That should be "tight-space-a-phobic." Claustrophobic should mean something else, like a fear of bear claws. Or a fear of Santa Claus. We should make up our own language. What kind of word is "language?" It should be "talkuage."
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-10-02 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-10-02 Pub. Date: 2016-10-02
Image Number: 148531
Caption: It's my memory, doc. The more I look into it, the more it's just all wrong. For instance … Dr. Noodle. The first book I ever read was a "Berenstein Bears" book called Up Down and All Around. But when I tried to buy it for my kid, I discovered it was BerenSTAIN bears, and that there was never a Berenstein Bears books called "Up Down and All Around." It's perfectly normal to misremember things like that. Even large numbers of people collectively misremember things. I remember "Berenstein" too. Oh ... yeah, I figured. It's a lot more likely than thinking aliens kidnapped me from an alternate reality where it was "Berenstein" and put me here ... not that I was thinking that. Take two "stay off the internets" and call me in the morning. Look up "Mandela Effect" and "Ford Logo" on Youtube and then tell me there's no multiverse kidnapping going on!
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-07-11 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-07-11 Pub. Date: 2016-07-11
Image Number: 145816
Caption: 1982. I wanna be president when I grow up. Psht … A girl could never be president. Most people don't even like girls. Girls can't throw. Girls can't run fast. Girls watch "Care Bears." It's not what I think, it's what most people think. Most people just don't trust a "Care Bears" sympathizer who's likely to have cooties. Most people will never vote for a girl. Most people are girls, Lemont. Face facts: We're as unlikely to have a girl presidents as we are a black president.
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-06-23 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-06-23 Pub. Date: 2016-06-23
Image Number: 144900
Caption: When are you going to teach your son about death? Never. If your toenail falls off, have you died? If you lose a foot to a grizzly bear, have you died? If a wild kangaroo rips off both your arms, have you died? If you can survive without parts of your body, who's to say you don't survive without the whole body? You can't just avoid having hard talks with your son. I don't want him to survive dying and then call me a liar.
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-01-27 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-01-27 Pub. Date: 2016-01-27
Image Number: 138297
Caption: The Double Date. So how did you two meet? Oh, it was really romantic. Do you want to tell it, or should I? You tell it, schmoochie. You tell it so much better. No, you tell it, butterbean. You tell it so much better. They are so disgusting, Princess Leia Pudding Pie. Tell me what they're saying, Cutie Bear. Tap tap tap tap t.
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-01-24 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-01-24 Pub. Date: 2016-01-24
Image Number: 137727
Caption: I told my wife all about us, Jenny, and she left me. That means we can finally be together, like we wanted. All the things we dreamed about over Facebook can finally come true. We can finally take that long walk along the beach … make love under the night sky on a bed of roses ... dress like big teddy bears and mud-wrestle ... All the beautiful things that we alone dared to dream are finally about to happen, Jenny. No ... this isn't Robert ... No ... this isn't Sam ... Jenny, are you joking with m -- No, this isn't Randy ...
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-01-08 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-01-08 Pub. Date: 2016-01-08
Image Number: 137379
Caption: http://archive.org. Wayback Machine. Year: 1776. URL: Facebook.com/ThomasJefferson. Thomas Jefferson. About an hour ago. We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal. Like 35. musketsam: You, sir, art a communist who knoweth aught about the way the world works. Thomas Jefferson: Communist? musketsam: You would have us believe all men are "equal." I suppose that means you also think all men should be given polar bears made of jelly beans and whatever else they want. Thomas Jefferson: If you are endeavoring to change my mind about all men being created equal, you are doing a good job of it. John Adams: LOL! John Smith: This is a good article. If you enjoyed this article as I did, you may also like this Wonderful Sale on Tomahawks I discovered. (This cartoon was originally published on 2012-04-26).
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-08-30 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-08-30 Pub. Date: 2015-08-30
Image Number: 131280
Caption: What's wrong, Lemont? I was just thinking about how the oceans make up two-thirds of our planet. And most of the underwater world is basically unexplored. We have no idea what or who may be living down there, Susan. What does it matter? We've been here for hundreds of thousands of years. If there's anyone down there, they obviously don't want to meet us. We don't know that. What if they're just as clueless as we are? What if they've just never thought to explore what's at the top of the water and don't even know life exists up here? There could be a whole civilization of mer-bears who think they're the paragon of animals. That's just silly, Lemont. Would a mer-bear be silly for wondering if there are air-fish at the top of the water?
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-07-30 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-07-30 Pub. Date: 2015-07-30
Image Number: 130317
Caption: Twitter™. Twitter.com/Candorville. @Candorville - I read your interview with your old roommate who joined ISIS. It was heart-breaking, cuz it reminded me of my own daughter who also ran away to join terrorists … instead of staying home and ordering the brand new cotton flavored grizzly bear treats from tinyurl.com/bxn8Lm6. The pope is right, Capitalism is getting out of control. Twitter™. Oh, how I loved my daughter.
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-07-09 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-07-09 Pub. Date: 2015-07-09
Image Number: 129284
Caption: Pick another story, son. No! I want beaw! You threw the bear story out the window. It landed in a dumpster, and a mangy dog threw up on it. Do you really want your beloved father to climb into that mess, get bitten by that rabid dog, and possibly get hurt or sick, just to get that book? Yyyaaaaay! That was not an offer.
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-07-08 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-07-08 Pub. Date: 2015-07-08
Image Number: 129283
Caption: Do you know what story you want daddy to read you tonight? Beaw. Daddy can't read you the bear book because you threw it out the window earlier today. Daddy told you, when you throw things away, they're not yours anymore. Thtop it! You can't make consequences go away by saying "stop it." Thtop it!!!
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-06-22 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-06-22 Pub. Date: 2015-06-22
Image Number: 128671
Caption: I read your blog post about that dad who didn't make his kid apologize for bullying your kid. I never understood the point of makin' a kid say words he don't mean. How that gonna help the situation? What you need to do is hire a bigger kid to pull that bully's drawers up over his head. Revenge is never the answer, Clyde. If he wake up an' find his teddy bear's head on the pillow next to him, he'd get the message.
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-06-02 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-06-02 Pub. Date: 2015-06-02
Image Number: 127776
Caption: I've gotta do something about my son. He won't go to sleep till about 4 A.M. It's driving me crazy. "The Dude Abuses." You want me to take care of this? There are ways, bruh. You don’t even wanna know about it. I can have that little dude sleepin' by 4 o'clock in the afternoon. I think I'll just let him grow out of it. I'll abduct his teddy bear, you write the note. (This cartoon was originally published on 2013-05-21).
     
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-02-03 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-02-03 Pub. Date: 2015-02-03
Image Number: 122418
Caption: How was I supposed to know it was innocent? You asked me to "hold something" for you. Never in the history of man has that turned out well for the person who's said "ok." Yeah, well Big Oatmeal an' the rest of the boys found it in my closet. All I could think of to save my rep was to say "I sell them things for $5 at the playground." I'm still not helping you break into "Big Oatmeal's" house to steal back your Teddy Ruxpin. You ain't no real friend.
     
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-06-21 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-06-21 Pub. Date: 2014-06-21
Image Number: 112734
Caption: Hi, Lemont? Speaking. Hey, it's Keith. I don't know any "Keith." Are you gonna try to sell me something, Keith? Lemont! Buddy! 'Course not! I'm just a total stranger calling to share the good news about Awesomecorp cotton-flavored grizzly bear lures. Goodbye, Keith. (This cartoon was originally published on 5/12/2012).
     
19. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-05-28 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-05-28 Pub. Date: 2014-05-28
Image Number: 111791
Caption: When are you going to teach your son about death? Never. If your toenail falls off, have you died? If you lose a foot to a grizzly bear, have you died? If a wild kangaroo rips off both your arms, have you died? If you can survive without parts of your body, who's to say you don't survive without the whole body? You can't just avoid having hard talks with your son. I don't want him to survive dying and then call me a liar.
     
20. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-11-21 bear 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-11-21 Pub. Date: 2013-11-21
Image Number: 104085
Caption: Google told me how to get you to go to sleep. Bwing it on! Experts divaricate on the matter. Mindell advocates progressively shortening the amount of time I remain in your room. Ferber, contrarily, posits closing your door for successively longer periods of time. The AAP postulates allowing you to select your own pajamas and sleep with teddy bears and other transitional objects will ameliorate your odds of success vis-a-vis somnolence. Zzzzzz. Brazelton posits that. I thaid Zzzzzz. (Originally published on 2012-04-12).
     
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