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Candorville

Comics and cartoons about the year 2008 .

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1. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-11-05 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-11-05 Pub. Date: 2012-11-05
Image Number: 89421
Caption: Remember how four years ago, Hillary Clinton had the superhuman ability to be all things to all people? Go on. Remember how I pointed out that she was "born" in 1947, the same year as aliens crashed at Roswell? Go on. Did you know Mitt Romney was also "born" in 1947? Go on. Remember when we were kids and I bet you $2 the alien invasion would happen before the zombie apocalypse? Stop.
     
2. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-02-27 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-02-27 Pub. Date: 2011-02-27
Image Number: 57548
Caption: 2011. Civil libertarians are upset at how often President Obama has asserted the "state secrets privilege." Some things should be secret, but still it goes to show how this president is way too secretive. That's proof he's subverting our democracy. You're just being paranoid. 2008. Civil libertarians are upset at how often President Bush has asserted the "state secret's privilege." Some things should be secret, but still it goes to show how this president is way too secretive. That's proof he's subverting our democracy. You're just paranoid.
     
3. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-01-09 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-03-10 Pub. Date: 2008-01-09
Image Number: 21007
Caption: Opsleet Computing, Ryan speaking. Ryan, this is a story about a man named Lemont who ordered a hard drive from you. Lemont paid $15 extra for two-day shipping, Ryan. The hard drive never arrived. Lemont is not happy, Ryan. When did Lemont order it? 2006. Lemont should give it a few more days. Lemont is feeling homicidal, Ryan.
     
4. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-06-06 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-06-06 Pub. Date: 2009-06-06
Image Number: 34736
Caption: Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Twitter. twitter.com/candorville. Dick Cheney just refuses to get off my TV. Apparently during the years 2001-2008, his secret undisclosed location was the year 2009.
     
5. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-02-03 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-02-03 Pub. Date: 2009-02-03
Image Number: 29874
Caption: Pros: Yo' new song is tight. It's positive. Uplifting. It makes it sound cool to be dignified. Cool. Cool. What's the cons? You don't say "n*****" even once. America elected a black man president. I ain't never sayin' "n*****" again. …D'oh! Good, I caught that, I'll jus' splice it in.
     
6. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-12-09 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-12-09 Pub. Date: 2008-12-09
Image Number: 28586
Caption: The Obama Transition Team, searching for a new church for the Obamas to attend. Vets Reverend Wilfred. Have you ever associated with criminals, malcontents or degenerates? I'm a minister, ministers minister to . …I mean "sinners." Is alliteration un-American? I believe the Norwegians invented it. So it's French, then?
     
7. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-12-08 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-12-08 Pub. Date: 2008-12-08
Image Number: 28585
Caption: Barack Obama hasn't been to church since the election. So? That's proof he's not a righteous man. Proof he only pretended to be religious to win. What else could it possibly mean? What does it mean, I'm being "vetted?" Have you ever said anything even slightly un-American?
     
8. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-11-18 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-11-18 Pub. Date: 2008-11-18
Image Number: 28119
Caption: So, you voted for Obama as the realization of Dr. King's dream that we'd all be judged by who we are, not what we are… Check. …and that all of us would have equal rights. Check. And then you voted to take equal rights away from gay people. Check. And you don't see any shameful irony in that. Check.
     
9. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-11-17 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-11-17 Pub. Date: 2008-11-17
Image Number: 28118
Caption: You waited in line seven hours? I'da waited 20 to vote for Obama. 400 years. About time America realized everybody on God's earth is equal. Tell it. Except the gays. Say what? Thank God I got to vote to keep THOSE PEOPLE in their place.
     
10. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-11-16 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-11-16 Pub. Date: 2008-11-16
Image Number: 28016
Caption: VH1 presents: Where are they now? The Ozzy-the-Undecided-Voter Story. The time was October, 2008. Journalists across the country yearned for him. There wasn't a television show around that didn't broadcast his beaming smile. And for one brief electoral season, Ozzy-the-Undecided-Voter was at the top of his game. Mainstream media. Which one is Obama again? But as sometimes happens in the dog-eat-dog ignoramus industry, his star dimmed like a light bulb over a moron's head. Guess who I voted for? Yawn. And it sent him on a downward spiral. Anonymous Friend. After the election, he started hangin' around the wrong crowd. People who read an' pay attention. He started recognizin' the difference between such things as ketchup an' mustard. I was shocked, an' I was like "What the @#$% did you do with the real Ozzy? Next up, Ozzy hits rock bottom...
     
11. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-11-07 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-11-07 Pub. Date: 2008-11-07
Image Number: 27822
Caption: The Starbucks at the end of the world. Refuge for the lost and abandoned. I'm totally lost. Don't know what to do. I'm a cartoonist. I draw a pretty political comic strip. I try to be timely, you know how we do it. Anyway, the election's over already, but since my comics are drawn weeks in advance, it'll be forever before I can even mention who won. That's so lame. Well, why not have your main character be stuck in some sort of limbo for another week? You're not helping.
     
12. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-11-04 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-11-04 Pub. Date: 2008-11-04
Image Number: 27819
Caption: So whatchoo doin' here, blood? I'm a journalist sent to cover the rescue of John McCain's lost honor. No, I mean whatchoo doin' here. This here the Starbucks at the end o' the world. Nothin' can find this place unless it's lost. Or abandoned. You mean "No one," right? Pass the chocolate espresso beans. The right to vote.
     
13. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-11-03 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-11-03 Pub. Date: 2008-11-03
Image Number: 27818
Caption: The Starbucks at the end of the world. Where the lost and abandoned can find rest, a warm cup and free Wi-Fi. Note to self… We found John McCain's lost honor, but it refuses to come with us. Of course it does. Why go back home to be with someone it hardly knows anymore? Someone it don't respect no more? Someone who keeps throwin' out his brand new Afro sheen? We still talkin' about John McCain?
     
14. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-11-02 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-11-02 Pub. Date: 2008-11-02
Image Number: 27644
Caption: Liebold. President: Barack Obama. Thank you for voting for Fritz Golem. What the--? CANCEL. President: Barack Obama. Thank you for voting for Fritz Golem. Who the @#$% is Fritz Golem?! I am Fritz Golem. Your new lord and master. YOU WILL SURRENDER YOUR DEMOCRACY TO ME. YOU WILL SURRENDER YOUR FREE WILL. YOU WILL BRING ME A HAZELNUT LATTE FROM STARBUCKS. I won't set foot in Starbucks for anyone. EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!
     
15. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-11-01 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-11-01 Pub. Date: 2008-11-01
Image Number: 27643
Caption: So John McCain never left you behind in Vietnam? No. I came here of my own accord after the divorce. I caught him in bed with dishonor. Embracing those who had attacked his wife and baby. Implying his opponent was a terrorist-sympathizer with inappropriate thoughts about kindergarteners. Spending the entire month of September approving campaign ads that blatantly lied. Letting his running mate incite hate at her rallies. So, I divorced him. I became a salmon, swimming upstream to the place where I was born. I take it you got custody of the metaphors. Let me know when you decide to rant, and I'll come over and interrupt.
     
16. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-10-31 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-10-31 Pub. Date: 2008-10-31
Image Number: 27642
Caption: Anderson Cooper's Battle Journal, Day 18: We found McCain's long-lost honor. After Karl Rove's lies destroyed John in 2000… …he told me: "My God…the genius of that. "The will to do that perfect, genuine, complete, crystalline, pure." That's when he realized, they were stronger than he was. You couldn't stay to talk him out of becoming just like them? I had frequent flyer miles that were about to expire.
     
17. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-10-30 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-10-30 Pub. Date: 2008-10-30
Image Number: 27641
Caption: I remember in South Carolina, 2000. McCain had sworn to be honest. Honorable. But we went there and the Bush people had spread lies and innuendo about him and his wife. The HORROR. He wept like a child. And then he said to me… …that nobody should ever do that stuff to anyone? No, he said "Wait, we can do that?" But good guess.
     
18. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-10-29 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-10-29 Pub. Date: 2008-10-29
Image Number: 27640
Caption: Did they tell you why they sent you, embeds? Why they want you to reunite me with John McCain? They said his campaign had gone totally insane. That his methods were unsound. Do you think his methods are unsound? Honor. I don't see… any methods… at all, sir. Are you assassins? We're journalists. So that would be a "yes"?
     
19. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-10-28 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-10-28 Pub. Date: 2008-10-28
Image Number: 27639
Caption: Anderson Cooper's Battle Journal, Day 18: The Starbucks at the end of the world. Manager said the lost and abandoned come through here from time to time. Said we might find what we're looking for. Pray tell, wouldst thou vagabonds know the way to the East Indies? First things first. Have you seen John McCain's honor? Perchance in yonder men's room.
     
20. Cartoonist Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-10-21 2008 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-10-21 Pub. Date: 2008-10-21
Image Number: 27501
Caption: Anderson Cooper's Battle Journal, Day 16: Airmail caught up with us outside Burger Queen 12 klicks up the Nodung River. I wish to God it hadn't. Dear Lemont Brown, we regret to inform you… …that due to the complete collapse of the American economy, we have reduced your Feudalbanc Massacard credit limit from $7,200 to $48.50. Also, you are now 50 cents over your credit limit, so your APR has been raised to 33.25%.
     
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